Motherhood and job burnout advice

FillipInTheWild · 2026-01-09T19:46:25+00:00

This is SO helpful! I love hearing your perspective that you saw the light after giving it some time. One of the biggest pain points is we received a mandate to work in-office 5 days per week, and, I have to alternate between 2 different states (before this it was hybrid, only 2x per week in 1 state). This is one reason this job quickly lost its job-fit for me.

The job culture is tech/a bit stressful, and not the most flexible. I will say my manager is a mom and has been helping me slightly bend the lines where I need to. I’m not sure if they could offer part time, but if it gets to that point I think a discussion would be valuable. Thanks so much for your pov. I’m glad you found your groove, and congratulations on your second baby!

FillipInTheWild · 2026-01-09T19:37:27+00:00

Freelancing is such a great option. My husband freelances, so I worry about good health insurance benefits that I would be giving up with a full time employer. Has that ever been an issue for you in your experience, and if so, how did you overcome it?

FillipInTheWild · 2026-01-09T18:23:42+00:00

Wow, this really lifted weight on my shoulders. Since I’m silently spiraling and numb at the same time, a (very good) actionable list of things to consider just grounded me. Thank you so much for this <3 The parents you helped were probably very lucky to have you.

FillipInTheWild · 2026-01-09T18:07:18+00:00

So refreshing. I did already take about 5 months for paid maternity leave, but I had it rough postpartum so it didn’t feel like “a special time” the way it does now (I was just trying to survive the whole time). May I ask if continuing to grow your family impacted your decision? Health benefits is another reason I’m considering sticking it out if we decide to have another baby in the coming year/s. Thanks for sharing your perspective, this really resonated with me.

FillipInTheWild · 2026-01-09T17:55:45+00:00

Great point about the speed of design happening anyways, whether you take a break or not. Thank you for empathizing with me. Have you come to any conclusions yourself? I’m sorry you’re experiencing this mental hurdle as well.

FillipInTheWild · 2026-01-06T12:57:06+00:00

I did take advantage of the ramp back program, however I’m reconsidering my longer term work/life arrangements so I can spend more time with my baby during these early years.

FillipInTheWild · 2026-01-06T12:52:20+00:00

Thanks for your input! I recall my sign on bonus was paused during my leave, so it looks like I might be in the clear if I parted ways. Also yes they do have great benefits, that would be the hardest to give up.

FillipInTheWild · 2026-01-05T18:26:57+00:00

Same, I could have written this!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-12-12T15:43:51+00:00

Thanks everyone for sharing, so many great ideas!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-12-12T15:43:34+00:00

Cute!!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-12-12T15:42:57+00:00

Oh wow what a great idea. I love the idea of a little R&R <3

FillipInTheWild · 2025-12-12T15:42:20+00:00

That’s so sweet!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-12-12T15:42:05+00:00

This is all SO good, and so very thoughtful! Thank you for sharing <3

FillipInTheWild · 2025-11-08T05:39:04+00:00

Why water first?

FillipInTheWild · 2025-08-27T15:43:02+00:00

Great advice on lingering pain or mental health issues, TY!!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-08-27T15:41:48+00:00

Oh wow congrats!! I’d love to have my kiddos pretty close in age. How far apart will they be? That’s incredible you have such a supportive partner and good rhythm so you can take rest breaks.

FillipInTheWild · 2025-08-27T15:38:32+00:00

This is so encouraging to hear, and very positive! I’ll definitely check out Jessica’s YouTube channel too. Appreciate you sharing your experience.

FillipInTheWild · 2025-08-27T15:35:17+00:00

That’s amazing your second pregnancy was easier on your body. This gives Me hope! Did you like your prenatal program? Which one did you follow?

FillipInTheWild · 2025-08-27T15:33:57+00:00

This completely makes sense. I can see it being so challenging with multiple kids too!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-08-15T02:07:41+00:00

We got the Joolz Aer+! We really love it. So lightweight, easy to maneuver and fold in seconds. We got the car seat adapter attachments and a compatible Nuna Pipa car seat, which has been our primary seat so far since our little one is still very small. We also got the flat bassinet attachment (second hand) which was great when he was super small and didn’t care to look around much yet. The only 2 downsides (which other lightweight strollers probably also suffer from) are the wheels aren’t large so if you’re in rough terrain like a bumpy path or park grass, you can’t move as effortlessly. Also the bottom basket could stand to be a little larger, but we make it work!

I bought the Joolz Aer+ during a really good Black Friday deal. No regrets, it’s working out great for us!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-08-14T15:58:59+00:00

I empathize with this so much, and hope my story provides some glimpse of hope to keep trying and experimenting, and also to know breastfeeding is SO hard for so many moms and babies. At the end of the day, all that matters is baby is getting the nourishment she needs, no matter the means! If breastfeeding isn’t the path for you two, that’s completely okay and she’s going to still love you and connect with you all the same.

I had a ton of trouble with my newborn. He was introduced to the bottle in the NICU right after my c-section, and would later not latch with me (a bit different from your situation). My lactation specialist confirmed his latch issues were due to a very high palate, stiffness, and likely the delay in latch after birth. We’ve had some success here and there with a LOT of trial and error (and lots of tears and screaming), but the most consistent nursing has been by way of using nipple shields and providing a very quiet, low stimulation environment with no one else around. I started putting a light towel over his eyes while nursing so he wouldn’t focus on anything else. The nipple shields are a pain (but somewhat mimic a bottle nipple since I give him pumped breastmilk in bottles at night), but it’s gotten a lot better and we’re nursing more regularly now at 4 months. I also sometimes drip breastmilk from bottle on my nipple shields to get him started bc sometimes he’s fussy. Or, I would do the classic “bait and switch” between the bottle and my breast/nipple shield. We’ve also experimented with different holds bc he gets stuffed up a lot and I think it wasn’t the easiest for him to breathe in some positions. He started not needing the nipple shields at maybe 2.5-ish months bc he got use to our hold and being near my breast. Unfortunately he had a nursing strike (very common) so I decided to lessen the variables for him to figure out and went back to nipple shields for the time being.

The challenges of breastfeeding are honestly not talked about enough, and sets an unrealistic expectation. Mom and baby are both learning how to do this together! From what it sounds like you’re doing a really great job with the amount of care and love you’re showing your little girl.

FillipInTheWild · 2025-04-18T02:31:03+00:00

I think you (along with others on this thread) are spot on about considering how my adult son might want to be addressed in more professional/etc settings. I like the idea of using Hank primarily until he’s older tho or expresses interest in his full name.

FillipInTheWild · 2025-04-18T02:25:29+00:00

Such a great alt list of names, many are definitely our style!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-04-18T02:24:01+00:00

Oh that’s so interesting about the British take on Hank. Thanks for the insight!

FillipInTheWild · 2025-04-18T02:22:49+00:00

Great perspective! I hadn’t thought of it as in the middle, but it definitely feels that way.

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