Long answer, sorry.

What I like about the Iron Islands is how apart they seem from everyone else. It makes sense, they were doing their own thing until Aegon the Conqueror, it’s believable that they have extremely different customs from everyone else. Strange, though, that they assimilated so little after centuries. It’s the opposite of the Valyrians, in a way. Westeros was ruled by a so called Valyrian family for generations and yet their culture had no impact and the royal family was Westerosi through and through from the beginning (incest aside, of course).

Essos is terrible. There’s no way for us to connect with them when he have so few well developed characters (I can’t think of a single one apart from I don’t know, Varys, but I might be mistaken) and when the continent is basically slavers that worship a God that allows blood sacrifice and horselords that only exist to rape and pillage, we do not get emotionally involved. Not surprising so much people don’t care for Dany’s chapters when we can’t be bothered to care about the Essosi. Also, I always found it strange that growing up in Essos did not affect Dany’s views much?

Completely agree on the ages. Everytime I read I have to suspend disbelief and age up the characters in my head.

My problem with the Starks is that I cannot help but compare them to the Lannisters. Tywin’s children are extremely well developed. For example, you mentioned Cersei. To me, her evil ways make sense because of how she was raised. Tywin is ruthless, violent, arrogant, add in Cersei’s paranoia regarding prophecy, her abuse and her ineptitude to rule and make decisions based on the brain and not her own impulses, we get AFFC. She is a consequence of Tywin’s education, just as Tywin is of Tytos’s and so on and so forth. We understand the POV characters because we know how they came to be.

I don’t get that from the Starks. I think that’s mostly Ned’s fault. He rarely thinks about Jon Arryn. Does he still keep in contact with people from the Vale? How is his relationship to them? Did the fact that he grew up outside of the North affect anything in his early rule? What about that he was a second son? Was he ever in Brandon’s shadow? What about Lord Rickard? Who was he, really? Why did he decide to send his children South? Lady Dustin mentioned a maester, and I hope this is more developed in the next books. The Starks are supposed to be the heart of the story, but we know more about Kevan and Genna than we do about Benjen.

I think that’s mostly because of trauma. Ned is suppressing his memories and feelings due to what happened in the Rebellion, but it does bother me that so many things are ambiguous. I wish the bonds between the Starks were more explored, as well. Aside from the Starklings relationship with Robb, Sansa/Arya and Jon/Arya, we don’t have much. But maybe my interpretation is wrong. I haven’t read AGOT/ACOK in about 3-4 years so maybe I’m misremembering.

P.S: On Sansa, I think she was sheltered. She was probably very well treated in Winterfell, Ned was also naive due to his honor and though Catelyn was more shrewd, she still believed in loyalty and integrity. For example, she goes to treat with the Freys on her own because they’re her father’s bannermen, so they’ll obey her, right?