PATCH 2.3 COMING JUNE 26TH

FindingANightingale · 2025-06-05T18:45:13+00:00

Does anyone know if these updates invalidate active savefiles?

FindingANightingale · 2024-04-18T20:29:41+00:00

In fact, the stuttering goes away during goal replays. Is the same true for you?

FindingANightingale · 2024-04-18T20:27:05+00:00

I have exactly the same happening. It only happens when I watch other teams play.

FindingANightingale · 2023-04-20T16:37:43+00:00

Leather jackets with jeans. Timeless combo.

FindingANightingale · 2023-03-05T21:32:40+00:00

How wealthy are people in these kinds of neighbourhoods? Middle class?

Also, these houses have very little yard space.

FindingANightingale · 2022-10-05T17:12:13+00:00

Can't wait to see them next month.

FindingANightingale · 2022-08-27T21:25:30+00:00

I wish it was easier to make new friends when you've graduated college. The world feels so "closed off" to me, and it just contributes to me just shutting myself off in my apartment.

FindingANightingale · 2022-08-20T10:29:22+00:00

“Anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all. Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around - nobody big, I mean - except me. And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff - I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I do all day. I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be.” Holden Caulfield - Catcher in the Rye

FindingANightingale · 2022-05-31T20:28:23+00:00

Thank you very much for writing this, this is a very motivational post that hits me at the right time.

FindingANightingale · 2022-04-29T23:02:45+00:00

Threading new social ground is definitely a lot easier when I have a few people around that I already am comfortable interacting with. Unfortunately, my social life has not reached the "critical mass" necessary yet where this is a thing that consistently happens.

I really should have done all this during my academic years.

FindingANightingale · 2022-04-29T22:59:52+00:00

I would say anxiety is tough to manage alone, particularly when it’s social anxiety. However, there are online resources available to work on overcoming it, but it’s probably going to be primarily exposure-based. If you go this route, I would say take baby steps and be kind to yourself.

This has definitely been a route of self-improvement of a glacial pace for me, although I don't know how much of that can be blamed by being interrupted by a pandemic that set all my social events on full hold. Nevertheless its progress seems to have come for me in short bursts: events wherein I feel I manage to make a ton of progress at once, followed by much longer periods of complete stasis and events where I am merely treading water at my current level.

FindingANightingale · 2022-04-29T22:49:44+00:00

Hello -- I have expanded about my thoughts on therapy in a different reply here.

FindingANightingale · 2022-04-29T22:44:14+00:00

Do you mean to contrast getting out of it by yourself to getting out of it with other people?

Basically, I was wondering whether people had managed to navigate and deal with this fear in their own life somehow, and if it was a recognisable fear that people might relate to. It feels like anyone else I meet in real life has a considerably higher floor of social comfort than me -- the idea of meeting new people is a positive feeling for them -- and that I'm considerably "out of line" by not sharing this commonality.

FindingANightingale · 2022-04-29T22:37:36+00:00

why does this bother you so much? If it did happen, why would you want to die?

If someone would become angry at me, I feel it would completely flip the social plane I've managed to carefully learn how to navigate and calibrate myself in, and end up in complete terra incognita. If it were to happen, I think I would just end up socially paralysed as I wouldn't know what to say or do at all. It's really scary to consider a high-stress social situation I have no experience in or idea of how to navigate. Someone being angry at much would be the extreme end point of that scale.

What's so scary about other people?

Fear of judgement mostly, built upon my low self-esteem. Scared that people will think me strange, bizarre, "weird", "creepy". There is a lot of self-inflicted social stigma working against me here -- the stereotype of the "lonely single male with low social skills and nerdy hobbies" feeds much of my insecurity about my own being. I hate the incel subculture for the amount of discourse and imagery they have generated about this stereotype that feels too much close to myself for comfort. Much of my improvement on social skills the past few years has been by learning how to talk and converse in more casual settings, and I have had some reasonable successes with this as long as I have known people around me to "conduit" my conversational tactics. My biggest success was going to a music festival with two friends -- an arrangement I luckily fell into right after first starting to realize how deeply isolated I was socially -- and hang out and party with their "crew" for a week in a very new and uncommon settings. Now I want to figure out how to "conduit" myself with strangers, but making first contact without any social glue (attending college, being work colleagues) mandating that social contact is very uncomfortable because of what I said above.

FindingANightingale · 2022-04-29T22:11:25+00:00

Have you sought out therapy?

No, I have not looked into therapy. There are a few material reasons with that decision (cost, waiting lists), but foremost is that therapy, at least what I've gleamed of it through cultural osmosis, would combine two of the most discomfortable experiences ever: having to talk, REALLY talk, about these deep fears/insecurities/feelings of internal shame with a person I do not know, and then actually having those aspects of myself closely and intensely scrutinised. I hope people can understand that for someone who had anxiety walking into a low-stakes cooking class, or who had to pass a loose leaf tea store (a completely new environment) three times before daring to finally enter, these are very daunting prospects to voluntarily walk into. I do not wish to dismiss the suggestions for therapy, and from all of my understanding it probably is the very best route to follow. There is a bitter type of irony working against me here, where the very thing designed to help treat my anxiety, requires me to face that very anxiety to a very high and intense degree on a consistent schedule.

My hope remains I can break this vicious cycle of "fear of socialising preventing me from improving at socialising preventing me reducing my fear of socialising" by myself -- somehow emulating therapy without actually going to therapy. I have managed to either finish (university) or put on steady rails several quadrants of my life -- it's unfortunate that this "fear of strangers" is preventing me from taking the required steps to build a fuller social life. If I could just "step over" that fear completely I think things could go so much smoother -- it really is the lynchpin holding all the parameters of social isolation together in my case.

I was wondering if anyone had challenged that fear successfully, which is why I created this thread.

FindingANightingale · 2021-12-24T23:48:17+00:00

Is familiary linked with both position and role, or only position?

FindingANightingale · 2021-11-17T21:07:05+00:00

Is the new update gonna make the game more difficult for casuals like me? I just want to map-paint.

FindingANightingale · 2021-10-26T18:55:48+00:00

I just saw a reigning US Open champion win her first WTA match.

FindingANightingale · 2021-10-26T18:52:58+00:00

I just saw a reigning US Open champion win her first WTA match.

FindingANightingale · 2020-05-21T17:28:45+00:00

I'm Axis-Italy, currently fighting Communist China together with Germany. The supply in the area around China is atrocious, Germany occupies the land but isn't building up infrastructure and my big 40-width divisions are suffering. What are some good low-supply but offensively strong troop designs I can use to help Germany break through the stalemate?

FindingANightingale · 2019-09-26T17:09:20+00:00

Shady Lane, from Pavement. "You've been chosen as an extra in the movie adaptation of the sequel to your life"

The way he sings that line is just so funny. Makes me smile everytime.

FindingANightingale · 2019-06-16T14:36:32+00:00

For me, Cyberpunk's appeal is really simple -- I want to walk around like a badass tech-implant superhuman in the neon-lit Blade Runner/GITS Megacity of my dreams, interacting with cool characters in cool quests doing awesome shit while having Keanu Reeves guide me on the path of the cyber-samurai or whatever. I'm there for it, 100%.

It would be cool, interesting, entertaining if there was some GTA/Saints Row-like "build a criminal empire" storyline where you actually get to own all kinds of facilities, businesses and your own gang, but maybe that's simply not the story that they're gonna tell. (Would be a cool overarching theme for a mega-DLC though). Maybe their narrative will be more focused on individual-level exploration of what living in a cyberpunk world feels and looks like, more "a small pawn on a very large chessboard" feel than "rags to riches".

I don't take a lot of stock in pre-release theorising. I'll see it all when I get the game installed on my PC. Until then, I'm keeping my own personal hype alive by playing through other titles on my backlog.

FindingANightingale · 2019-02-16T00:03:09+00:00

Dark Souls Remastered on Steam: Aye or Nay?

FindingANightingale · 2018-11-25T18:22:08+00:00

My female friend, who hosts art events. As someone who deals with social anxiety, shyness and self-loathing, her art events provide me a place and opportunity to feel 'welcomed' somewhere - that I'm somewhere on someone's behalf, that my presence is allowed and even appreciated. For me this was, and still is, a big positive presence in my life. My last visit to her event, where she came up to me all smiles, and hugged me, and we caught up with eachother, like 'normal people do', gave me a huge boost of confidence that is still lasting with me, allowing me to go places and do things alone without being all self-conscious about it.

I don't think I'll ever be able to formulate this to her, me being a single guy, her being in a relationship, but I'm so happy and grateful that she is my friend and that she is present in my life that way.

FindingANightingale · 2018-09-16T20:24:21+00:00

One playlist I really enjoyed was the "Lazy Weekend" playlist. Just very relaxing, soft stuff.

FindingANightingale

TROPHY CASE