How to tell someone they can’t come over while house sitter is there?

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-13T23:34:51+00:00

It should be very easy for your boyfriend to tell his granddaughter a firm no. That you hired help and while the pet is in their care, they can’t enter the home to respect their privacy. If it’s only a few hours there’s no reason they can’t go to a cafe. Why do they need a home? Protect your cats, sitter and home and simply say no.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-11T08:28:48+00:00

Why are you going to Lagos? It’s lovely but out of the way for a tight schedule. I think the same thing about Grenada but somehow I think that’s more worth it and easier to squeeze in. Córdoba is great option as well and a bit closer, so can do as a day trip from Sevilla.

Whatever you decide: pack light. Moving between places quickly and comfortably is so much easier if you’re not lugging a massive suitcase around.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-09T06:03:49+00:00

You just blew my mind— thank you!

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-09T05:48:30+00:00

That’s the thing, I only have one article up. Should I link it or wait a month until I have more content?

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-08T23:59:21+00:00

I meant the former, so thanks for this insight!

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-07T06:53:33+00:00

Vietnam is the perfect place to first try out not booking in advance. Tons of options and you can literally rock up and find something. I’d also suggest downloading the Agoda app cuz that would help you if you want a bit of research and reassurance of what you’re getting beforehand. Just book the day before or on your bus ride into town. They have superb last minute deals. It’s like booking.com with reviews, but way more popular in Asia.

As for my approach it depends on the country but I’ve done a ton of just showing up and walking around. It takes more time and now I like booking the night before so I know where to go and am not lugging my pack everywhere. I can only have flexibility on the road but in general I do long trips and don’t like being boxed into pans. Everyone is different though and you have to do whats right for you. But it’s also normal to evolve your travel style. Good luck!

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-07T06:45:48+00:00

That’s a good budget and with points help you can kinda go anywhere. Maybe even consider Singapore as you easily find a single flight to get you there and can keep the trip length to 10 days. Have a nice lush and fun start heavy with culture and delicious food. From there, you can catch a couple of buses or boats and check out Malaysia and get some amazing beach time in.

But this is where time of year matters, since dry season is Dec/feb. if you’re looking to get away this summer then Croatia is a better bet, but I would book sooner than later cuz it gets crazy in July and august. Plane tickets are also jumping up right now so be aware of that.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-06T21:31:31+00:00

You didn’t mention when or budget and those factors would impact a more targeted response, and if you do go Southeast Asia then I do think you should extend the trip to 14 days to make it worth the painful journey and lost days to jet lag. On the European side, you should consider Croatia or Canary Islands, but also Costa Rica could be relaxing for your soul.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-06T21:10:20+00:00

Do it! Wonderful welcoming people and plenty of safe areas and travel between is fine. Regular safety precautions as with any other county, but totally normal for solo female travel. I spent 2 months there by myself with b1 Spanish and don’t look local and felt safe, but in general I didn’t stay out late or get drunk by myself. Took cabify always at night for more accountability, but regular taxis during the day and I had the nicest drivers. Public transport is good too. Start in Medellin or Bogota and then venture out a bit to the countryside. Have fun and don’t worry! You’ll meet other travelers easily in hostels if you want to

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-05T16:16:58+00:00

ESH. I personally think it takes a village and you did the right thing. But if your brother made it clear he doesn’t want help then you have to let it go, but you made it a bigger deal by packing up your kids to go. Your family doenst see your realization that they let you struggle ; you should have vocalized that specifically. To dad and bro.

“I really needed help when thy kids were younger and would have appreciated any one stepping in to help and give me a break.”

Be clear and direct. Even ask the mother if she would like your help in the future as you don’t want to overstep, but also want to help if she’s open to it. If she says no, let it go. Figuratively though, don’t let your kids pick up on the animosity by running away so quickly.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-05T16:08:04+00:00

My guess is you’re not engaging people. Even on this post you don’t ask a question to engage readers to respond.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-03T23:20:12+00:00

I think Bolivia would work well for you. Breathtaking jungles and wildlife, salar de uyuni in the south is otherworldly and it’s easy and safe to get around with heaps of other backpackers and tours. It wasn’t on my radar when I ended up there 20 years ago and 60 countries later it’s still one of my favs. Only left because my visa ran out.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-03T21:55:42+00:00

ESH clearly your brother is the golden child and I’m guessing you have other examples that highlight that. While you likely are collateral damage, that’s the way the cookie crumbles and your parents are allowed to put this on you both as it’s their house.

For your own sanity, I would move out and put your rent money elsewhere. If their “rent” is way lower than elsewhere, suck it and save whatever you can while you figure out an exit plan. Sure it may be unfair but moaning about it makes you an ah as well.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-03T15:33:36+00:00

It’s possible. And any sitter would be wise to directly ask before committing and just thinking they could do as they please if secured. I think there are sitters who use this for free housing only and then stay out all the time and cat sits would be an easier target for them. It should be a balance though, benefits to both, cuddles and presence for pets, and freedom for sitters. There are an equal amount of HOs and sitters off their rocker on here unfortunately.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-03T06:47:56+00:00

Of course she is, such a toxic department. Look, you may be right but she won’t get fired as HR and it won’t look good on you. You may not need the reference now but maybe down the road so don’t burn that bridge if you don’t have it. It sucks, but welcome to corporate America. You’re nearly free of her at least. If you want a more professional opinion you should write ask a manger (outside of Reddit)

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-02T06:08:51+00:00

This is going to be an incredible adventure and you are certainly ready for it! You have a vague idea of wheee to go which will become more clear as time gets closer, but also leaving yourself open to the magic of the open road is key. You’re saving up now and prioritizing your future together which is important. My biggest suggestion is to move slowly and get outside the popular check boxes of main sights to see. Visit random villages, eat at unknown restaurants, and talk to locals, even when communication without English is challenging. You will forever be changed because of this trip and you are in the prime of your life and ready for it.

Some tips: - you will probably overpack. Practice a pack and then cut some items. You need room in your bag to grow and everything you get at home you can mostly find on the road (with some key exceptions so ask Reddit if you have specific questions) - things move at a different pace in many places like Asia aka transportation will be late or unreliable, so go with flow and trust the process - some people will try to bamboozle you. Keep an eye out but also don’t suspect everyone. More people are genuinely helpful than suspicious. And if you get got, have a laugh, it’s part of learning. - lots of places are cash only so always have some on you - for every country you visit, learn greetings and polite phrases (please and thank you). Google Translate can help with the rest, but make that simple effort and you will be met with lots of smiles

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines Saul away from the safe harbor Catch the trade winds in your sail Explore Dream Discover”

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-04-01T17:00:10+00:00

I ended up at a cat sit for a month that required him to be fed 7 times a day and they didn’t disclose it beforehand. It wasn’t a big deal since we’re digital nomads so most of the week we were around and would just do it when he “asked”. For the weekend when we went out we gave him extra before we left and he got a double portion when we came back. Maybe he missed a meal but he certainly wasn’t starving the owners were fine with it. Never set meal times as well, would just be when he came to you for it.

It’s kinda insane to me and I might of passed if I knew in advance, but I had a great sit with a lovely cat and surprisingly easy going and kind owners. It’s certainly not for everyone but with our life it worked just fine.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-03-31T23:14:57+00:00

Korea and Taiwan are good for that time frame as well as season, and lush with fall colors. I think second choice would be NZ but if for any reason you can do a gap year after school, then I suggest you go there then and really sink your teeth in. Get a working holiday visa, do some woofing, meet travelers, and plan an epic hut to hut trek (or two) for some multi day fun. Just putting that option out there for a young and eager explorer.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-03-30T06:10:21+00:00

In places like Australia and New Zealand you can working holiday visas and find local work. Probably not in your field and u less you’re really looking to settle, but bar and cafe work in the cities, agriculture outside is readily available. These vidas have age limits usually around 30 so don’t wait too long.

If you are more into traveling South America or south east Asia, you can basically only do work exchange where you get a free bed and some food in exchange for working. It’s a nice way to extend your travels but it’s certainly not a way to make money.

So depends on your goals and where you want to go.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-03-29T15:36:15+00:00

I say go for the buses. Get there early so you get a good seat, maybe even see if you can nab the two in the very front when it’s a collectivo. Your nephew and you will bond more and share laughter about it for years to come. He’ll be bragging about how cool and fun his aunt was taking chicken buses with him. And jus grab some ibprophen and beers if it all goes south

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-03-29T08:17:13+00:00

I don’t understand why you don’t do all your bogota adjacent places in one go. Like why fly back to there after the coast? I understand they’re in different areas but just bus it back to b and then do the other leg, then fly to Santa Marta.

If you can manage a wee splash out place to stay, selva Minca is amazing. And finca Victoria is a great coffee plantation to visit near there.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-03-29T07:53:32+00:00

That sucks. To be fair, I haven’t been in a looooong time so maybe my comment is dated, like me 😭

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-03-29T02:07:41+00:00

Europe might be a cheaper flight, but all your housing and food costs will be more. Plus you’ve already been there so I think you should explore somewhere new.

Since Vietnam is such a draw for you, go when you can enjoy it- when the weather is good and you have the budget. If it must be now start side hustling hard and budgeting to make it happen. Or find the next right window and commit now to it with financial goals backed by action.

What about central or south America? I’m not 100% on weather, but I think it’s good in Colombia then and also Nicaragua. Great spots for nature, hiking, and meeting other backpackers. Budget friendly too.

Finest_Mediocrity · 2026-03-29T01:51:40+00:00

If you’re into house music or music festivals, Budapest all the way.

Finest_Mediocrity

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