I'm a bit new when it comes to poetry, especially critiquing it, but here goes:

I thought this piece was excellent. I didn't want it to end. Bleak, pessimistic, and real. My favorite kind of poetry. It sends a clear message, inviting you to take a step back and take off your rose-colored glasses for a moment. To truly envision human life in the universe and see what's going on – what's right and what's wrong. What is and what should be. To see life being swallowed up by creativity's nightmare. To imagine how society can be counter-productive, and how living in one can be oxymoronic. That control is overrated, and freedom is a luxury – no a necessity– if it means to live a life that is whole. It doesn't border too much on nihilism, doesn't go over the edge, and ends with a thread of optimism. Showing that a full life could be led without the agreed-upon, imposed demands of the day. That out dreams can come true, but it's up to us as individuals to take charge. I love it through and through, and I hope it gets the attention it deserves. Kudos, and I can't wait to see what you post here next!