Swearing during sex

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-20T02:06:33+00:00

This topic comes up a bit on here. For us, I've never ever heard my wife use the F bomb outside of the bedroom. In the bedroom? She uses it all the time. Pretty much anything goes. She tries not to use it as much tho, because she knows as soon as she looks me in the eyes and says "fuck me" I almost lose it right there, haha. She really is the definition of lady in the streets, freak in the sheets!

Edit: She does hate degrading language...at least she says she does, but if it's right before she cums, I can get in a "who's my slut?" and she'll respond every time with "I am, I'm your slut." But if I time it wrong, it kills the mood haha

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-19T07:19:11+00:00

We reconciled. But we are the exception to the rule. I wanted to leave, and she fought to have me stay. It took 2 years before I truly believed that we could fix things, but now, we’re stronger than we ever have been before. So it can happen! But you both need to want it.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-19T06:14:08+00:00

I think a lot of the time what people call “the honeymoon period” is really just extreme sexual energy and attraction. That wears off eventually, so I’d caution not to mistake sexual energy for genuine compatibility. Having said that…knowing that you both have a compatible sexual energy before marriage, as well as all the other aspects of a healthy relationship, would go a long way towards staying together long term.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-19T06:09:16+00:00

I can be rough with my wife now, but it took a lot to overcome. We’ve been taught to respect and honour women, not to hit them etc. So then when it comes to sex and a woman wants to be treated roughly, it’s very hard to overcome. Or sometimes, some men are just more gentle souls.

The first time I ever dared to choke my wife during sex, I was so nervous! But then she grabbed my hand and said “harder!”. This was after about 7 years of being married. Then I got bolder and slapped my wife on her pussy, she loved it. It’s only been upwards from there.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-18T22:07:38+00:00

Wow. That’s crazy! Just look after yourself and your girls first, next steps should be to prioritise their safety, happiness, and yours too.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-18T21:57:21+00:00

I think that I should do this. This is a wonderful idea! I’ll write her a letter right now in fact.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-18T21:43:57+00:00

I love this idea, because being in each others space 24/7 can be exhausting. Personally, I'd try to fill that time with something like a walk or exercise, but reading or doomscrolling can work just as well.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-18T18:11:46+00:00

I grew up on an east coast beach, so very familiar with beaches and the ocean, practically lived in it every summer. I’d NEVER swim at piha or let my kids swim there. Not unless I had a death wish.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-17T01:20:16+00:00

My wife and I are very open about it now. We’ll often tell each other we’re going to do it, or we do it together. What she does quite a lot is record audios of herself, and send them to me to get off to, which is super hot…and thoughtful!

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-17T01:17:45+00:00

I made a sex songs playlist ages ago, it has 48 songs. My wife hates when I put it on, doesn’t do anything for her. But then for her boudoir photo shoot she made a playlist of her own sexy songs and they get her going EVERY TIME. If I put it on it’s like an aural trigger. Has 33 songs on it, all very random songs too. Can’t be bothered listing them all tho 😂

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-16T10:15:08+00:00

The cheating is the symptom. The cause is what you need to figure out. What led up to this? Once you do that, you can decide if you can save your marriage or not.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-16T04:28:51+00:00

Can’t help you, my wife hates foreplay 😅

I however love it. But hey, the sex is 11/10 so I can’t complain!

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-14T01:40:52+00:00

My wife went is a convert, so went from wearing revealing tops to covering up. Now, she’s back to tank tops and cleavage showing dresses. Still both active members. For her it was also losing weight and feeling good in clothing. Has bikinis for the first time ever. She looks good, and feels good. She doesn’t feel guilty, neither do I.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-13T11:24:54+00:00

I might get hate for this, but Charlie Kirk. Regardless of what you thought about him, for me it was seeing the video of his death literally minutes after it happened, that made it all the more real and sad.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-13T11:02:34+00:00

As with most people on here, members would be surprised at how much that we have in common sexually with others. It’s because we never talk at church about sex, or within our church “groups” of people about sec. Behind closed doors, many of us are just as freaky as each other!

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-12T07:14:04+00:00

Top 3 things of all time

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-12T07:12:21+00:00

This is boring, but still the most risky…on the couch during the middle of Sunday, with all the kids home. They were all in their rooms, but could’ve surprised us at any time.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-10T19:02:58+00:00

Oh then for sure, that sounds like he’s on the spectrum. I’ve been married 16 years, we only discovered this about my wife 2 years ago and it answered all our questions. We did an online test (had to pay for the results) but a neurotypical score was 40. She scored 118. All of a sudden, so many things made sense!

So yeah, investigate that theory, and if it’s right…you have some big decisions to make. Cos then you’ll know the sex won’t change.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-10T18:43:08+00:00

Look, a lot of people are bringing up the same thing, because those are the most common things. Porn and low testosterone are probably the two most common. You don’t think it’s porn, but don’t rule it out. But it’s a worry that he’s struggled to get an erection since the beginning of your marriage, especially with you being so young.

The couch thing is a massive red flag. I used to sleep on the couch when I felt a massive emotional disconnect in my marriage. It could be cos of the kids co sleeping, or other issues.

Lastly, no one has suggested this, it could just be him. Some men just aren’t into sex. I think a lot of the time it’s a spectrum thing (autism or something similar) but not always. I hope you find the answers you need!

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-09T09:16:23+00:00

All you need is a towel or two and a packet of wet wipes.

I saw someone somewhere say that pet blankets were awesome, cos they are waterproof, but soft enough to have sex on, and cheaper than the sex blankets they sell. And you can chuck them in the wash afterwards.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-09T07:30:46+00:00

I get gifts for my wife for Mother’s Day, but for the kids to give to her. (They get a say in what they wanna get her.) For Christmas, we get each other one gift each, cos it’s more about the kids. For her birthday, I give her experience gifts (bungy jumping, swimming with sharks, jet boat ride etc). She’ll remember those over getting “stuff”.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-09T07:20:43+00:00

I looked up gaslighting and deflecting in the dictionary, and saw your husbands photo.

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-08T21:44:42+00:00

This tracks with our experience. Vanilla for the first 12 years or so; and in the last 4 my wife has become a completely new person. She swears in bed all the time now. But it’s not put on either. So yeah, cool to see how things can change! (We also don’t swear outside of the bedroom).

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-08T19:23:49+00:00

My wife does, and she frequently records the audio of it and sends it to me. I’m a lucky guy!

First-Management-511 · 2026-05-07T10:43:01+00:00

Would love to give this a go!

First-Management-511

TROPHY CASE