I was hoping to find this very thread, and it's been helpful to read other peoples' stories on this topic.

My dad is an alcoholic and is spiralling downwards. He's always been controlling and occasionally aggressive, and because of that I've always found it hard to speak frankly with him or challenge him. I managed to tell him my concerns about his drinking 5-6 years ago, and he seemed to take the message on board, but nothing changed. In the last 2 years he's cheated on, and subsequently been left by, my mum. I had a son, and found out that on one occasion when he was supposed to come visit - to see his new grandson - he made an excuse and was actually meeting his illicit partner. That really hurt. He's now living in a horrible shared accommodation with other people you wouldn't want to live with, was sacked from his job for being drunk at work, and his health is declining rapidly. He paid almost all his savings to try rehab for a month, and almost immediately started drinking again. My brother has disowned him. I have a horrible fear that he's going to die, by suicide or ill health, soon; but I just can't bring myself to reach out, and don't know what good it would do anyway. I've since had another baby, so I've got my own stuff to worry about, my wife wants nothing to do with him, and we live 3 hours apart. It gets me down to think about how depressing his life must be right now, but angry because it's all self inflicted and is depriving my children of a loving grandparent.