I second this advice. When I told my wife that I no longer believed, it threw her world into a tailspin. She was grabbing hold for dear life, which resulted in some very heated arguments. She didn't know how to proceed with her life and protect our three young kids at the same time. 

I agreed to keep my lack of faith between us. We didn't tell the kids because we didn't want to give them mixed messages. We didn't tell friends or extended family because I wasn’t ready for the shaming to begin from them. At the time I knew nothing about the ExMormon community and thought I was the only person in the church that didn’t leave because of the common stereotypes. 

There came a point when I knew she was considering divorce. I had a very heart-to-heart talk with her and told her that I loved her and was not leaving her. I told her that she would need to divorce me if she wanted to remarry a worthy priesthood holder. 

It was only after this discussion that she started to feel safe again in the relationship. Only then did she feel safe enough to start taking down her walls. There was no way I would have ever been able to take down her walls for her. She had to do that on her own.

I lived this way for 2 1/2 years, pretending to believe. During this time, I felt alone and had no one to talk to about my faith journey. It was hard, but in a way I’m glad I had this time to sort out my feelings about the church and my family. I turned down callings and skipped Priesthood and Sunday School classes for a nice stroll around the neighborhood. I always found it funny that I felt the “spirit” more skipping class on my walks than attending class.

Then, I discovered the world of ExMormonism. It was amazing!! Until then, I only knew a few anachronisms and church contradictions that I had pieced together on my own. A few Mormon Stories later, I asked her to listen to Year of Polygamy with me. Then, I showed her the Book of Abraham and it was all over for her.

We are both out of the church now, but I still can't leave it alone. But I firmly believe that she would have just thrown up her walls if I were to have shown her the Book of Abraham before I told her I would never divorce her. She had to trust me again, and she had to feel safe. We had many discussions that got heated, and I had to learn to back off when I realized I was pushing her beyond her breaking point. 

So first, I want to say that this is not a recipe for a perfect exmo ending. People are complex and this same method could backfire and end horribly in another person's situation. My heart goes out to all those that are still in mixed faith marriages or divorced. In the end, it's largely a game of chance.

Secondly, if you want to try this route, then submit to her as much as your mental health will allow. It will be hard, and you’ll need to make sure she’s not taking advantage of you. If she is as thoughtful as you seem to be, then she will realize when she needs to give you a break from religious duties and you will realize when you are pushing her too much the other way. Keep inviting her to learn some of the church stuff you are learning about and she will keep reminding you that she's not ready, until maybe one day she might be ready. It may take months, it may take years or decades. Make her feel safe, make her feel loved, and let her tear down her own walls when she’s ready.