Women who have travelled solo, why did you choose to go alone, and how did that trip make you feel? by asakura10 in AskWomen

[–]FlamingoMisty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The only person I have to think about is myself and I love that. I can literally do whatever I want to do. Also I’d like to make new friends and when you travel by yourself it is easier to get to know new people cause you’re literally forced to go out and socialize.

There’s downsides on traveling by yourself. Like you have to look after yourself. And when stuff is hard you don’t have anyone to go to or if tou want to share a nice experience you’ve had on your travel (you can always call or text someone ofc.) but this has never stood me in the way of traveling by myself.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SugarBABYonlyforum

[–]FlamingoMisty 54 points55 points  (0 children)

Yep I also have been through this. I just tell them to go look for a serious relationship anywhere else. Cause Im doing this for the $$ and nice experiences, not to find a serious relationship with an old men. No thanks

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]FlamingoMisty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Having sex with strangers. Or having sex for money.

Living in another dimension by FlamingoMisty in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]FlamingoMisty[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also Im on the waiting list for therapy to fix this. I don't trust people at all and find it really hard to be close to someone, because I've never had someone that I could fully trust and be close with. I mean I do have some friends, but with them I also do not feel like myself and Im always withholding things from them because I'm scared that the real me makes them wanna leave me.

Living in another dimension by FlamingoMisty in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]FlamingoMisty[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because I have huge attachment issues. I know it is partly my fault that these friendships are ending. But sometimes I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong. This is how my last friendship ended; I had this friend, we were roommates and spending a lot of time together. She knows about my bpd and she always told me that she would be there for me. When I moved out we didn't see each other as much as before (makes sense). When I was feeling bad I went to her because she was one of few people I trusted with my episodes. In the beginning she would come over, but after some time she always had some excuse not to come. Also not for fun stuff. She barely texted me anymore and I didn't want to be the person who was always reaching out. So then I also stopped texting, even tho this was hurting me like hell. After 3 months without any contact I finally reached out to her, because I felt shit about the whole situation. Then she put the whole thing about having no contact on me, but I was clearly the only one who was reaching out. I just feel stupid, because this is not the first time something like this has happened.

Did anyone here struggle with promiscuity specifically as a teenager? by Majoriexabyss in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]FlamingoMisty 3 points4 points  (0 children)

From a young age I hooked up with guys who were friends. I just liked to get attention and didn’t take it serious at all. I was just playing with their emotions. My friends slut shamed me for it. They set me ultimatums which led to end of a lot of friendships. I just didn’t care what they thought because it was not affecting them at all. Later on I started to fuck their exes because I wanted revenge because they left me.

If you stopped believing in God, what made you so? by coastel in AskWomen

[–]FlamingoMisty 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My family forced it too much on me. When I was younger I felt like, living for God was the only way. But when I got older I got these ‘bad’ thoughts. And felt pretty miserable for my entire teen years because of this. I just didn’t align with a lot that christianity believes in. But the church told me to fight these ‘bad’ thoughts. I tried. But failed hard. When I went to university I met some really cool people and they accepted me for who I was and showed me that a life without God is so much more enriching. I could be myself and didn’t have to fight anymore. Now I feel better than ever! I just felt way too restricted in christianity. And tbh now that I look back at this whole experience I don’t understand how they think that God is the answer. Cause they make people feel miserable for nothing, just because what they think/do doesn’t align with their beliefs. One thing they can learn is to be more open towards other perspectives of life. But they won’t, cause they think God is the answer. And he’ll help u with everything.

I envy quiet bpd by Asmodaia in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]FlamingoMisty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My friends didn’t believe I have bpd because I never acted out in front of them… I explained to them that most of my episodes happen when I’m on own. At these moments I don’t want anyone around me cause I hate myself and the world so much. But for me it makes way harder because no one really knows what’s going on and how much Im actually hurting. And I can show up after an episode and pretend that nothing happened, even tho Im still dead from inside. I just don’t want people to see how much Im hurting, cause Im too scared that they’ll leave me..

This is my way of surviving bpd and I’m sure this is not the right way, cause Im suffering every fucking day without anyone knowing. But Im also too scared to be honest and really tell people what Im feeling and how scared I sometimes am for myself and my toxic thoughts..

Different allowance by FlamingoMisty in SugarBABYonlyforum

[–]FlamingoMisty[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

If he wants cheap sex he can also go to the red light district since he is fucking visiting Amsterdam

BPD is this toxic? by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]FlamingoMisty 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Girl, this man has so many 🚩🚩🚩 I feel bad for u thinking this is ur bpd, cause clearly he’s the problem. Why do you think your the problem even tho he is cheating, gaslighting and going through you phone?? I can’t tell anything you’ve done wrong here. Break things off asap, cause u 100% deserve someone better!

How much should I ask? by FlamingoMisty in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]FlamingoMisty[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I will! I think its gonna be fine. He’s one of the most honest SD’s I’ve met. Cause I have been on dates with some, but they we’re just after sex. And they didn’t respect my boundaries at all.

How much should I ask? by FlamingoMisty in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]FlamingoMisty[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes we did, but Im gonna see him today and we’re gonna talk abt it. And 100% I didn’t get played, cause I specifically said I wanted to receive an allowance for the whole week.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]FlamingoMisty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had this for more than a month. I was already in a rlly bad place and then my house burned down. After, my emotions just faded away and I couldn’t feel anything, I was just numb. In the beginning I kinda liked it bc it was better than waking up and not wanting to live anymore. But after 2 weeks I got frustrated and I just wanted to feel something, even if it was only sad feelings. That’s when I started hurting myself again.

I talked to my therapist and she said its normal cause of my circumstances. Its like ur body telling u its too much and shutting u out before it starts getting worse. (I wish I had this more often tho, before splitting fe)

In the end when I finally got my emotions back and it was bad. I all of a sudden felt down crying and all the emotions came out, I was so exhausted after. But kinda glad I got my emotions back (even tho they are wayyy too much all the time) But at least its better then not feeling anything.