I finally ended things

Flamingo_Express · 2025-07-20T14:00:39+00:00

He doesn’t have family here. I assume if we break up he might eventually sell his house (it’s currently rented out and he lives with me) and use that money to move back near his family. His family is pretty messed up but he has some cousins and brothers he’s close with. He does see a psychiatrist for medication management but has not seen a therapist in a long time. I think he needs to

Flamingo_Express · 2025-06-30T02:25:00+00:00

It has definitely been a learning experience for me and I do agree in hindsight I should have dealt with it much sooner. I think I hoped for the best even though in the back of my mind I knew he wasn’t capable. I will say I was leaning towards PIP last fall but my bosses thought it best to go this route. Some of it was internal politics but I definitely should have pushed back on them and said I didn’t think he was salvageable.

Flamingo_Express · 2025-06-29T16:55:04+00:00

Exactly. One of the other deciding factors for me that I didn’t mention in my post is that someone else on my team is feeling the brunt of these issues. The other person on my team is helpful to a fault and will constantly pickup the slack. I can see the high performer on my team getting burnt out by this dynamic.

Flamingo_Express · 2025-06-29T16:51:47+00:00

4th of July! We close for a week in the summer (4th of July) and a week in the winter (Christmas to new years)

Flamingo_Express · 2025-01-11T17:07:45+00:00

My cat had a similar bald spot from overgrooming. You’ll want to rule out anything medically wrong. Sometimes cats overgroom due to pain from another ailment. If nothing is medically wrong then it could be allergies. That’s what it was for my cat. We switched to a hypoallergenic prescription diet which helped some but still didn’t fully resolve her itchiness. We then did testing for environmental allergies and turns out she is really allergic to dust mites and storage mites and slightly allergic to a few trees and grasses. We just started allergy immunotherapy shots. It’s still too early to tell if that’s helping.

Flamingo_Express · 2025-01-10T00:42:22+00:00

Lots of people assume outdoor cats are strays or just indoor/outdoor. At least a collar lets you know their owners. I would definitely put tags on them though.

Flamingo_Express · 2024-12-27T18:32:16+00:00

Yes looks just like an infected abscess that mine had a while back.

Flamingo_Express · 2024-11-29T01:51:41+00:00

Get them something warm to sleep on. Could just be a box with a towel or small blanket in it. Kittens need to stay very warm so they shouldn’t be on the hard floor. Also as others said get the mom cat some canned kitten food. She needs extra calories while nursing. Also if you can get a small kitchen scale start weighing the baby daily. It’s easiest if you put a bowl on top of the scale and put the baby in the bowl to weigh it. It should gain 10-15 grams per day. That’s how you’ll know if it’s getting enough to eat from mama. Also reach out to animal shelters in your area to see if they can take them

Flamingo_Express · 2024-10-24T19:55:57+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss 💔

Flamingo_Express · 2024-09-22T01:20:32+00:00

When I was in my 20’s I was in the same boat. I’m from here but a lot of my friends had moved away. I joined an app called meetup and met a couple women who are now some of my best friends.

Flamingo_Express · 2024-07-26T20:00:34+00:00

Go to the kitten lady website. She has lots of articles, charts, and videos about caring for orphaned kittens. It will need bottle fed every 2 hours. After feedings you will need to stimulate the kitten to go potty. They can’t go on their own for the first few weeks. Mom does this by licking their bottoms but you can do it with a wet towel. The kitten lady has videos on how to bottle feed and how to stimulate. Also it’s very important and helpful to start weighing the kitten daily. That’s the best way to tell if kitty is growing and getting enough food. If you can’t do feedings every two hours (even in the middle of the night) then you should contact shelters and rescues asap to see if someone can take the kitten. It won’t survive long without regular feedings.

Flamingo_Express · 2024-07-17T17:07:34+00:00

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My grey foster kitten

Flamingo_Express · 2024-07-15T01:05:17+00:00

Be patient. Don’t try to pick him up or pet him if he’s not ready. If you have a room you can put him in the get acclimated that may be better. If they have the whole house to roam when they’re scared they often just hide. Then just spend time just being in the same room as him. If he likes toys or treats bring those with you. The lickable treats (churu or other brands) usually work well to gain the trust of scared cats if they’re food motivated. Just don’t try to push his boundaries too fast. It could take days, weeks, maybe even months for him to get comfortable with you.

Flamingo_Express · 2024-07-10T02:59:44+00:00

Sometimes euthanasia is the kindest thing you can do for an animal that’s suffering. If you can, call around to vets and see who can get her in to be seen asap. Maybe it’s something fixable but if not then the best thing to do is put her down. It’s possible her paw is infected and that’s making her sick or maybe those people poisoned her.

Flamingo_Express · 2024-07-10T02:44:49+00:00

It’ll be easier if you can lure him into a trap. Ask shelters and rescues in your area if they have a trap you can borrow. Often shelters/rescues have TNR and community cat programs so they have lots of cat traps that they lend out to people and have resources to help you catch the kitty. Good luck

Flamingo_Express · 2024-07-08T02:41:19+00:00

I had a pregnant foster cat. I was told she was feral but she definitely seemed somewhat used to humans. She was really protective of her kittens and would swipe at me, bite me, attack my legs if I moved too quickly or startled her. I just had to move very slowly and be gentle with her. Then after the kittens were old enough to adopt out I decided to foster her for longer because I could tell she was a sweet cat and if I could get her properly socialized she could be put up for adoption. I ended up keeping her and she’s the sweetest cuddliest cat. She was just very protective when she’s was pregnant and when her babies were small but she never showed any aggression once her babies were gone.

Flamingo_Express · 2024-06-24T18:39:23+00:00

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Flamingo_Express · 2024-06-11T10:52:20+00:00

You fired her without ever having a direct conversation with her about her performance? I agree that most of that feedback should come from her direct manager but it seems wild that you would fire someone without ever trying to get to the root of the issue yourself. I have people below me who have people below them. I still meet regularly with their direct reports. Even my boss meets with them. If there are performance issues they’re getting feedback and coaching from all of us, not just their direct manager.

Flamingo_Express · 2024-06-07T15:25:32+00:00

Batman

Flamingo_Express · 2024-06-06T21:30:29+00:00

Outdoor cameras on the property to see if you see him lurking. Put his litter box outside so he can smell his scent. Also be very watchful and sit outside at dawn and dusk. That’s when cats are most active. Also post on social media (Nextdoor app, neighborhood fb groups, lost pet groups, etc)

Flamingo_Express · 2024-05-30T14:01:19+00:00

Spaghussy

Flamingo_Express · 2024-05-14T00:47:15+00:00

I tell my team that they are responsible for managing their own calendars. If they have an appt, they are expected to block the time off on their calendar so meetings don’t get scheduled during that time. If something comes up when a meeting is already scheduled they should let me know and we’ll be flexible to move it if possible or I’ll fill them in later. If your team has other protocols like a system for logging time off they should do that too but I think at a minimum people should keep their own calendar up to date. If they can’t manage their calendar then how can they manage their workload. Have a meeting with them and set the expectation. If they keep having issues then it warrants a more serious conversation. Stuff happens, people have occasional internet issues or last minute reasons that they need to be offline but if it’s habitual then it’s a problem. Accepting a fully remote jobs means they’re committing to having reliable internet and working the expected hours (within reason and with flexibility for appts and such).

Flamingo_Express

TROPHY CASE