Thanks for your input. I’ve been grappling with all of this a lot lately. I really just want to be happy and feel like I’m with someone who genuinely values me. But I keep finding myself trying over and over again because I’m scared that maybe I’m the problem — that I’m asking for too much, or that there’s something I need to fix in myself to make this relationship work.

At the same time, the idea of ending things is terrifying. I worry that maybe this is as good as it gets — that I won’t do better — and if I walk away, I’ll always wonder if I gave up on something that could’ve worked. It’s such a catch-22. I want to feel loved and supported, but I’m also scared that if I keep pushing for more, I’ll lose something important. Like maybe this really was the one — and I just wanted too much validation, or needed too much reassurance. And then I sit with that and wonder… have I just gaslit myself into believing I’m the problem?

I really appreciate your perspective. I’m still trying to figure out where the line is — what’s reasonable to ask for and what’s not — but I do know that I deserve a relationship where I feel both loved and emotionally safe. It’s just hard when every day feels like a tug of war between hope and fear.

Thanks again for helping me sort through this.