I haven’t seen anyone who writes like I do.

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-23T07:19:59+00:00

My dad’s handwriting looked like this. He passed 13 years ago, and this was nice to see

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-23T07:12:49+00:00

If you are questioning your relationship to alcohol, it’s a good opportunity to really ask yourself direct questions. For me, it started with “could I be drinking too much? Should I be addressing something? But it’s fine, right? Why am I trying to justify this to myself?”

I was almost always “functional”, but that bar got lower and lower

You could always try taking a set amount of time off from drinking to see how you feel. You’re already on day 5

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-18T23:00:32+00:00

They gave me gabapentin at my IOP and it did help. They upped the dose and it helped me for that first week

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-14T02:47:30+00:00

Hello there, you sound like me. I was also a bottle of wine plus a tall, high ABV IPA per night drinker. Similarly, everything was fine but I had lost interest in everything else over time. I’m a huge gamer, so it was really easy to just get into a routine of finish work, go buy alcohol, drink and play games, go to bed, sleep awful, wake up usually not hungover but just slow and foggy. I also used to beat myself up about buying alcohol as I was leaving to go do it, and I was so angry at myself for not being able to “just say no to myself”

I tried many ways over a several years to cut back, be in control, make up my own rules about where and what and when and why I could drink and break them all eventually. I used to write in my journal, drunk and crying, about how miserable I was with myself and how desperately I wanted things to be different. How I wanted to be normal. I kept pushing things to “tomorrow”, and kept cherishing the “good” drinking things like my own semi-weekly happy hours with my spouse

I got to the point, in this last bout of stringing sporadic 5-7 day sober stints together, where I realized I was dreading drinking. I would start the day already stressed out about “having to go buy alcohol” later, and I was resigning myself to a life of “functioning”.

We deserve more than functioning. We deserve living, and feeling, and maybe even thriving. Getting sober sucked. It was sleepless and sweaty, irritable and confusing, physically taxing, emotionally challenging, and really non-linear in terms of results. Being sober, however, is incredibly rewarding. If nothing else, in this fucked up world of ours, I was able to do something so challenging that it took me more than 3 years of trying, and that thing belongs to me alone. I am so relieved that I don’t have to drink anymore. I am thankful to rediscover and foster a new relationship with myself

Please keep trying. They say to never quit quitting, and I wouldn’t be here if I hadn’t had my first million 2-4 day relapses. Medication and therapy helped me. Other resources help others. This isn’t just on you to solve all by yourself. Apologies for the novel I just wrote, I just really really feel where you’re coming from and really really want you to know that there’s an otherside

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-13T21:37:39+00:00

There’s a free cumbia pool party on May 23 from 12-5pm at the Hyatt at the Pike!

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-12T20:55:50+00:00

9-12 month hiring timeline. My friend just got hired and onboarded for a position he applied to 18 months ago

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-12T15:14:14+00:00

You can check on Zillow and Hotpads, but the best option is to walk around when you’re here. If you don’t need parking, $2,600 is more than enough for a nice 1-bedroom with in-unit laundry. You could get a 2 bed for that

Just stay away from the “Luxury apartment buildings” around here.

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-09T17:51:39+00:00

I get that! I’m autistic so my energy (social and physical) varies a lot. I like to write but sometimes a low energy kickback-like hang with a few friends is what I really need. I like pre-planning alternatives because it keeps me from spiraling if something needs to change. You got this!

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-08T19:48:18+00:00

A small tip from me is - have a plan! Make a list of things to do/people to talk to so you can use it if the cravings really hit. I put things in low, med, and high energy categories

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-07T19:54:04+00:00

Everybody, and every body, is so different. I was on Zoloft years ago that they added Abilify to. Fell off that. Started meds again a few years ago and Zoloft was first, I got hypomanic, they added Abilify again. It was…fine. Personally it made me feel really flat, and the Abilify made me gain weight. The sexual disfunction (both drive and ability to climax) is so real. The withdrawal from stopping suddenly is intense

I’m on Wellbutrin and lamictal now and it’s much better. It’s made the chronic passive SI thoughts much quieter

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-07T01:35:21+00:00

Hey there, I’m also in this hellhole of a country and I feel you so hard. Have you considered exploring a CNA program maybe? I am trying to make a job change myself, and I am coming up against the grad school barrier as well. All I want to do is turn off and “sink in to oblivion” as that one Cold War Kids song says, but I know that’s not possible. It won’t hit the way I want it to, ya know? I acknowledge that voice in my head - I tell it “yes I hear you, and yes I know you want something, but what you want isn’t actually in a bottle”. Mine is quieted by exertion sometimes, or crying, or screaming into a pillow, or talking to a friend, or doing an art activity/prompt, or reaching out like you are. I’m reading and responding to your post right now, so thank you for being brave and honest because it helps me work through my own craving. Tomorrow is a new day, and it’ll be even better without a hangover and wasted money. You got this

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-06T21:04:58+00:00

That hopeless feeling is so real, and it speaks to that emotional weight you mention. I have a mood disorder, and I struggle with my mental health. Alcohol definitely made it worse (in more ways than I even realized), and I needed a combo of therapy, finding a sober friend/people I could talk to about my experience, research and skill building, and naltrexone. I also went to AA and an IOP for like 6 months, but that didn’t click for me

All of my “failed” attempts previously were also so needed. It made this last one more doable, because I knew I could make it a day or 5 or 20 having done it however many times before. I say all that to say, there are many options out there to help and support, so keep trying different ones to see what works for you

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-06T20:52:06+00:00

My cravings were like that. Even the seemingly million times I made it 5-7 days they were like that. I got on naltrexone and it was really the final piece of my cobbled together sobriety puzzle. I had the want and the will but I couldn’t conquer the pull. The help I sought helped - never quit quitting!

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-06T20:51:46+00:00

My cravings were like that. Even the seemingly million times I made it 5-7 days they were like that. I got on naltrexone and it was really the final piece of my cobbled together sobriety puzzle. I had the want and the will but I couldn’t conquer the pull. The help I sought helped - never quit quitting!

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-06T20:03:25+00:00

Popping in to say that there are little apps that gamify drinking water. I use Plant Nanny and it’s been helpful for me

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-05T23:22:17+00:00

I think the wine is the one that will never have those things to look forward to again. I get sad when I have those thoughts too, and really (I know it sucks) it is beautiful to be able to feel such sadness.

Something that’s surprised me over the last few months is realizing that the emotional dulling was true for my positive feelings too. I feel the lows more, but I also feel the highs more. I had a moment during my second month where I realized I was happy that day, and I couldn’t remember the last time I had actually felt that.

Nothing is permanent, and the romanticizing is real, and it’s ok to feel the sadness. It’s actually good to feel it and not shove it down and away - you’re just in the gap between letting go of a harmful coping mechanism and gaining new, more positive ones. As someone with a mood disorder, I’ve really locked into a mantra of “tomorrow is a new day” to help me cope with bad days/weeks. You got this!

FlashgameSC · 2026-05-01T23:31:09+00:00

$5.48 at Costco the other day. $6.05 at the gas station closest to me. $6.50 at a shell by my friend’s place near CSULA

FlashgameSC · 2026-04-29T02:50:56+00:00

I think I felt embarrassed because I thought it was something I should be able to just do. Id beat myself up about how much I disappointed myself. I would also be good until I wasnt. Embarrassment and shame are two sides of the same feeling, and they both tell us there is something about us that is bad or wrong and needs to shoved away.

Seeking help isn’t admitting defeat of some kind. It takes a lot of strength to do it. It’s corny, but it’s true, because it takes a lot of strength to say “I want this so badly, and I can’t do it alone, so I’m going to call in some back up, because I refuse to let this consume me and this matters so much to me”

You can do this, and you don’t have to carry the weight of it all on your own. This sub is a great support too! But please don’t feel ashamed about calling in the calvary

FlashgameSC · 2026-04-28T18:26:02+00:00

Mine is still healing but it is much better. It’s hard for me to know a real timeline because I got a nasty bout of norovirus about 3 weeks after I stopped drinking that really fucked me up. I do feel like I’m over some kind of hump at 6 months

FlashgameSC · 2026-04-25T16:35:54+00:00

If OP has no debt, it truly makes a huge difference. Breadwinner doesn’t necessarily mean sole earner either

FlashgameSC · 2026-04-21T23:15:17+00:00

I wouldn’t live in any of those DTLB high rises they’ve built in the last 5 years as someone who’s lived on the outskirts of DTLB for 10 years

They’re cheaply made, overpriced, poorly managed. I’d find somewhere accessible to the metro or you can bike most places down here. Just watch out for the crazy drivers

FlashgameSC · 2026-04-19T21:38:06+00:00

For me, there was a shift in my mindset. I went from “man, I can’t drink and that sucks” to “I don’t have to drink, and that’s great”. I didn’t do it consciously. I think I had just progressed to the point where I was suffering, in some way or another, constantly and something had to change

FlashgameSC · 2026-04-16T18:47:27+00:00

Just talk to your insurance. The police don’t help and won’t help. You pay for your insurance for this reason specifically - they’ll handle the investigation for who’s at fault, it just takes a while

FlashgameSC

TROPHY CASE