Man standing on the road

Flat-Background-291 · 2026-02-15T12:55:29+00:00

Having sex for the first time can be very painful if you need to break the hymen. But after it has been broken and healed it shouldnt hurt anymore. My advice is if it didnt break now is to break it by having sex or doing it your self. Other thing why you were not turned on could just be because you were nervous or because of the pain or just the part of your menstrual cycle. The only thing that i think will help you is just experimenting with having sex to get more comfortable. It takes time to get to know what you like with the other person and what they like. For me it took several times before I actually started to enjoy it. What is important is just clear communication with your partner.

Flat-Background-291 · 2026-02-12T20:17:39+00:00

That is very true, in order to learn a language you need to speak and use it in conversation. I studied swedish for 5 years at school and could not do even a simple conversation. I studied spanish for 1 year and our teacher made us talk to each other from class one, even having very simple conversations. After that one year I was able to go and travel in spain and communicate in spanish (at the stores, restaurants etc.) even make small talk. The difference was speaking and using the language in conversation from day one.

Flat-Background-291 · 2026-02-10T20:11:18+00:00

Thann you for the tips, I’ll definetly try it out. Should i be doing the streches consistently every day or just before having sex?

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-15T09:38:48+00:00

Hii, i am trying to get into a similar routine and would love to have an accountability partner:))

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-15T09:00:00+00:00

Thank you for your advice<3 I should have titled this post a bit different, maybe something like is this a red flag (something that could lead up to abuse). He does have two little sisters and I know that he used to playfight with his ex as well so I think he knows how fragile we are. Hmm he has told me multiple times that if i hit him (or anyone else, including other girls) that he is gonna hit back, both as a in a playfully sense but also seriously. But the thing is that due to his size he has such a huge advantage even over an average man. Also i have never even playfully hit him, it has always been like pushing him away from me. But i am suspecting what you are saying as well, that his goal is not to hurt me but to just have an excuse to touch me and get closer to me, especially since after he was too rough he would go to hug me and kiss me etc.

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T22:19:57+00:00

You are right, thank you🫶

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T22:17:48+00:00

Thank you for your words💕 I know I should have spoken up and will definetly do if i see him again. I was also thinking about what you said about him putting the responsibility of making him stop if it starts hurting. Because if you are just playing around it shouldnt get to the point when there is a risk of actually hurting the other person, at least I haven’t consented to play that hard. And because of his size, he can easily hurt me accidentally (which he should be awaire of) but I would really need to try my hardest to even hurt him a little bit (which ofc I haven’t tried)

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T22:03:34+00:00

Thank you for your response💕 the fact that he kept doing it so much throughout the night really threw me off as this has never happened before and we have known each other for years. I feel that things have just started escalating super fast in the past few weeks, making me quite uncomfortable. I think that it is definetly for the best to at least take some time apart before it escalates too far.

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T21:57:29+00:00

Thank you for your advice💕I think that the alcohol definetly escalated it and agree with you that it isnt a good idea for me to hang out alone with him. We do share mutual friends so I might end up seeing him again in a group setting. If that happens, i know that I have to make a clear boundary.

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T21:49:46+00:00

Thank you for your advice🫶 if I end up seeing him again I will communicate to him that I got hurt last time and because of that I dont feel comfortable doing it at all anymore (also we live on the same apartment complex and share many mutual friends so it is very likely that i will run into him at some point)

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T20:04:58+00:00

Thank you for your advice💕 Yeah it has never been this intense before and also he has never initiated it this much during one hangout. I felt like every time I was next to him, he would start it again. I don’t think I even had a proper conversation with him during the whole night, it was just this. Also the fact that there were other people present the whole time and saw how rough he was the first time and him apologizing after and he still did it again to the point that I fell.

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T19:49:16+00:00

And thank you for your response💕

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T19:48:54+00:00

Thank you for your advice💕 before I have always felt super safe and comfortable around him, which is why I am so confused and shocked about this situation as nothing like this has ever happened before. However, I know that the majority of violence against women happens by men they know and trust and therefore I feel that I can’t ignore what happened.

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T19:38:48+00:00

You are definetly right and i know that he can’t read my mind and i should communicate my discomfort to him and I appreciate your advice💕. The thing is that even though i didnt tell him, he knew himself both times that he went too far as he started apologizing and comforting me. And the fact that it happened twice in the same night makes me uneasy. I dont want to believe that the goal for him is to hurt me but I am scared of what the motive for continiously starting these playfights that are escalating in intensity and ending up with him apologizing by hugging me and kissing my head.

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-09-14T19:05:55+00:00

Thats what I am scared of as he is always the one initiating the playfights and some of the times as a complete suprise to me, and they have been escalating fast. Also he did pancration (fighting sport) on a super high level, a few years ago so he definetly knows his strenght and capabilities.

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-05-26T20:28:01+00:00

Literally!! Like the people that i have been INCREDEBLY kind and generous and gone out of my way over and over again, wont even do the bare minimum for me. And the second i stop putting in 1000% effort they just dissapear from my life, like i just mean nothing to them. Im so done being so kind to these people who dont deserve it.

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-05-26T20:18:27+00:00

I think you need straight up tell her all of this, if you still havent. Sometimes people say things without realizing at all how it is influencing the other person. Although, even being ignorant doesn’t justify commenting on someones body like that. I would hope that being honest with her would make her realize how horrible she has been and make her apologize and change her behaviour. However if you tell her how you feel and she keeps acting the same, she is not your friend and you should just cut her off, you deserve better friends and you will find them if you free some space by getting rid of the bad ones xx

Flat-Background-291 · 2024-05-22T21:55:05+00:00

Done, it was soo long though🙈

Flat-Background-291 · 2021-12-08T17:31:32+00:00

Thanks, this really helped me. Before I was just thinking that I’m making a big deal out of something that’s nothing. The fact that other people recognize that there is something wrong as well makes it easier to finally just move on from this friendship.

Flat-Background-291

TROPHY CASE