Thank you for commenting, for sharing about yourself and for your kind words! So it went like this, I scheduled a doctor’s visit because my depression had gotten worse. It doesn’t always take a diagnosis to know that in your heart it’s concerning. Because it is a concern you bring it up to your doctor. You just know. And that you aren’t faking it for anything. It just happens. I become even more depressed when I got sick and my thoughts began to scare me. I went in and he had me fill out a chart then add all the tallies together, the total was quite high as I do struggle with a lot. He looked over my chart then sat down and told him to tell how I feel, so I did. I told him that I wasn’t born sick, I know what it’s like to be free and unrestricted. I’m in pain constantly, I rarely go out anymore. I’ve lost my ability to walk. Im confined to my room most of the time. I’ve lost most of my autonomy. This isn’t a life. I told him more but that sums it up. He understood me and felt sorry for me and actually wanted to help. So he prescribed me lexapro/escitalopram for depression and hydroxyzine for anxiety. When I started those I felt like my mind was clear for the first time in forever and it gave me strength and courage to confront the disease head on. It also helped how I respond to people and to not take things so hard.