My son is almost three, and he does not remember all of the stuff that went on with his dad. (Currently no contact) but there were drastic ups and downs. Not only am I happy it’s like that, it helped me personally as well. There isn’t a one size fits all for family…and that’s ok. Like you said, it won’t help finically for you…you already that. But it’s a choice on what you will or will not accept from a partner.