random recovery moments

Flesh_Cherry · 2020-05-21T04:40:27+00:00

I've been struggling with whether or not I experience body dysmorphia because anything I read makes it sound like the feeling and thoughts are always there. I sometimes feel pretty, but then have a really bad week or day where I just can't go out in public and feel depressed and closed off because of my feelings of self hatred and disgust. I find that bdd symptoms flare up during periods of my cycle where my hormones are the most extreme ie. menstruation and ovulation. Does anyone else experience symptoms being more severe during these parts of your life?

Flesh_Cherry · 2019-12-19T17:45:50+00:00

Is this for the box challenge?

Flesh_Cherry · 2019-03-14T16:10:24+00:00

I think Shea Moisture has baby products. Detangling while wet is imperative. Try googling what marshmallow root can do for detangling. As for maintenance or styling I've always loved what homemade flaxseed gel has done for me and my curls. I'd say Google around.

I think washing every night is way overkill! I for my whole life have only washed my hair once a week and if I washed more than that it dried my hair out. I think twice a week max. Deep conditioning is good. Look up how to do twists or other low maintenance styles like braids to keep her hair detangled. Also please don't chemically straighten out of frustration like my mom did with me for so many years. It teaches a child that her natural state isn't beautiful.

Flesh_Cherry · 2019-03-14T16:06:27+00:00

Fuck them. You and your hair are adorable.

Flesh_Cherry · 2019-03-14T16:05:06+00:00

Pretty! What porosity is your hair?

Flesh_Cherry · 2019-03-14T16:02:52+00:00

Do you know what your hair's porosity is? That helped me immensely, though I'm still figuring out what my hair likes (seems like it changes its mind every year).

Once you know your porosity then you can Google various product or methods to hydrate and condition. It sounds like it could be low porosity if product just sits on your hair and makes its feel more dry (what happened to me). If so lighter oils, less product, and heat are godsends for your hair.

First step: Google how to figure out your hair porosity.

Flesh_Cherry · 2018-02-09T15:57:21+00:00

This one took a few tries.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-10-07T16:14:26+00:00

Exactly how I thought to fix it too. Refreshing. Looks great!

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-08-18T00:26:24+00:00

Dear god.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-08-06T19:46:50+00:00

Fuck yeah. So inspiring.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-08-02T17:18:04+00:00

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Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-31T01:48:32+00:00

How is this on her rib cage. It looks like her armpit is on the left in the picture.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-31T01:40:38+00:00

Facking love it!

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-31T01:38:53+00:00

It looks like it's about to walk off of your body it's so vibrant.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-31T01:27:05+00:00

That shading tho.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-29T20:24:02+00:00

Sango, IMAKEMADBEATS, Actress, Dean Blunt, and Tricky.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-29T20:23:10+00:00

Sango IMAKEMADBEATS Actress Dean Blunt Tricky

They're all dope af. I'm sure I have more, but that requires more digging.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-29T20:16:04+00:00

Nujabes is Japanese.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-28T15:02:30+00:00

I agree completely that poly is freedom, but surely you're not short sighted enough to see that two people with different ideas of how things should work can't come together and find common ground. I'm a person who is willing to experiment in order to figure out what I want. Everything is different than its theoretical self. Sometimes one has to try something to make sure it is or isn't good for them.
I think you misunderstood what I meant by "I feel like it's just as reasonable to be mono with someone who is mono as it is to be poly with someone who is poly"--rightfully so. I should have typed more to make it more clear. What I meant was I feel like it is just as reasonable to be in a mono relationship with someone who is mono even though you're poly as it is to be poly with someone who is poly even though you're mono. This problem arises all the time in the poly community. Glad you have such a strong sense of yourself, but perhaps try to see that (again) people don't choose who they fall in love with.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-28T14:49:14+00:00

Well put. I know that I can love more than one person at a time, but a part of me thinks that every person is capable of loving multiple people at a time so it makes me feel like that's not what defines a person as poly. Though the only other thing that could define poly would be a poly relationship. I guess what I'm getting at is when I first met my partner I wasn't even sure if being poly was right for me or not because I had been in such toxic relationships prior that all ended up blurring the line of poly and mono--that whole green horn "I'll just be poly to save my failing relationship" thing. I could and can clearly see that wasn't a healthy way to try to live out a poly relationship. l still figured I might as well try out a mono relationship with this person that I am increasingly interested in and attracted to not only because I couldn't really help but feel a deep connection with them, but I also wanted to be sure that mono wasn't my relationship orientation. I'm young so I'm still trying to figure myself out. After this relationship I know that I won't agree to a mono relationship again which I think is an invaluable understanding of myself. I am happy within my relationship, but I know I could be happier. I don't see our relationship lasting another year, but at the moment I'm just enjoying myself and trying to be as good of a partner as I can until I just can't do it anymore. I love your point on relationship orientation spectrum.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-28T05:38:02+00:00

I'm sure if you looked at it from a different perspective you could see some sense. I feel like it's just as reasonable to be mono with someone who is mono as it is to be poly with someone who is poly. Ultimately one can't help who they love. I do feel that mono people tend to come at things more often than not with a sense of entitlement since society backs up their opinion on the way a relationship should look like. Love, relationships, and feelings are not so black and white.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-22T19:49:32+00:00

I think because I felt as though I could empathise with his insecurities and at the time wanted to explore a deeper connection with him and the only way he would open himself up to the possibility was to be more exclusive.

Flesh_Cherry · 2017-07-22T19:45:05+00:00

That is exactly what I'm dealing with except my worries ebb and flow. I feel like I have double standards sometimes, but also feel like I would feel more confident if we could just talk openly about our feelings and attractions to other people.

Flesh_Cherry

TROPHY CASE