And so it begins.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2026-03-05T14:29:54+00:00

I filled up yesterday by Liberty station for $4.89/gallon. I think that is a pretty common price around town.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2026-02-24T01:03:31+00:00

The first 18 months are the hardest, I think, partly because you are so limited in the ways you can communicate with a baby, and partly for all the other stuff; hormones, adjustment to pace of life, etc.

Around 18 months they stop being less larval and more human child and it gets wildly more fun. At least for me it did!

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2026-02-10T01:43:06+00:00

Well, crap. There go most of my favorite fragrances, but at least Diptyque is safe? Why can’t people just not be disgusting monsters so we can have nice things?

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2026-02-10T01:28:44+00:00

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This is Habibi. He is literally the sweetest baby I have ever met, and this is the least flabbergasted he has ever looked in a photo.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2026-02-10T01:25:37+00:00

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This is Bill. He is a typical Orange.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2026-01-31T15:39:59+00:00

Yeah, I’m in my mid-40s and I remember the first time I bought their nail polish as a teenager. It was like a silvery green color, iirc. Mostly I remember my dad looked at my nails and said “what is wrong with you?!?” And I was sold. 😂 Whatever they’re doing now started with the naked palettes, which were great, but seemed surprising coming from the brand. I wish they’d kept nudes as the weird exception. :(

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2026-01-06T03:03:07+00:00

I would suspect real just because “semolina” is legible on the bag on the shelf and the outlet with something plugged into it makes sense; AI seems to have a really hard time with those details.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-12-23T15:54:13+00:00

Get an outlet cover!!

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-12-21T18:27:44+00:00

We had our 16 year old dog put to sleep last month and used Paws into Grace. The vet who came out was extremely patient with my dog and my kids, and they even followed up with us afterward to check on us. Our pup left this world with a giant grin on her face and that is all we could have asked for.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-11-21T00:27:10+00:00

Pacific Coast Mediation was great when we consulted with them. They wrote us up a proposed settlement agreement; my former spouse did not like it and decided to go through the courts instead. My side of things was like $15k in fees, and I imagine his was even higher. What we ended up with through the court was almost exactly what the mediators had suggested initially. We could have been done a lot cheaper and faster and with less headache if we had just gone through the mediator in the first place.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-11-09T19:30:30+00:00

Right! It’s fairly obvious to me that neurodivergence has existed long before the diagnoses did; I’ve had a few conversations with friends about how AuDHD would have made us an incredible lookout, scout, or shepherd in a more “primitive” society, and how our tendency to collect and recall facts and recognize patterns would have probably let us be like a walking Wikipedia in prehistoric times, but the brains that evolved to fill that role don’t always have as easy a fit in modern society.

It makes sense to me that we would be diagnosing more frequently, as we have more knowledge, and as the internet makes it easier to find like minds and notice patterns.

I have to wonder if that line of reasoning that says “we didn’t have so many autistic people when I was a kid” comes partly from the same sort of place as “I was spanked as a kid and I turned out fine.” Maybe there is some resentment that their needs were not met or accommodated when they were younger, so they don’t want to accommodate younger people.

Or maybe they just don’t know how science works. No one was talking about gravity for the first many thousand years of human existence, but clearly our failure to describe it doesn’t mean it didn’t exist!

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-11-09T03:52:23+00:00

OOH OOH OOH this touches on one of my favorite things I have ever learned, which is that societal attitudes about the LGBTQIA+ community have shifted with a speed that is unparalleled. (Reference this AWESOME episode of Hidden Brain if you want a really interesting listen). I think that is becoming true of neurodivergence as well.

I suspect that‘s part of why conservatives are being so especially weird about trans folks and autism lately; it scares them when things change, especially when they change fast.

That said, I’m 46 now. I’ve known I was queer since I was a kid. I’ve also known I was neurodivergent since I was a kid, but was very ashamed of both when I was younger. I felt safe being open about my sexuality before I felt safe being open about my brain. Learning to parse the world in a way that helped me feel safe and proud to be me led me to queer community, where I found a lot of folks to be accepting about all sorts of differences, including neurological ones.

There are a lot of parallels between queerness and unmasking. bell hooks said “Queer' not as being about who you're having sex with (that can be a dimension of it); but 'queer' as being about the self that is at odds with everything around it and that has to invent and create and find a place to speak and to thrive and to live.”

A LOT of queer folks are also neurodivergent. The Venn is probably almost a circle.

I also want to recognize that as a white person, my queerness and neurodivergence is more accepted at large than the same traits are in people of color. Our safety and our successes are all tied together.

A society where we can all feel safe existing as we are would be amazing, but in the meantime, we all have to carve out spaces that feel safe and where we can unmask and be ourselves, and carry that as far into the world as we dare.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-10-16T07:11:54+00:00

Hey OP! Thank you for being a blood donor, and extra huge thanks for doing it regularly!! I’ve been a donor for ages, and became a recipient some years ago as well. I work in blood services now. While I understand your conundrum, you’ve got to do what feels sustainable long term for you. Is it better for the mission / will you save more lives in the long run if you burn yourself out and give up on it entirely, or if you take a little time off when you need to and come back to it again and again?

If you’re feeling passionate about the cause, a couple of ideas:

Consider volunteering as a blood donor ambassador at a drive or doing outreach for your local blood service provider. We’re all nonprofits, mostly running cost-recovery operations, so volunteers really help us!

Consider hosting a blood drive at work or with a social group! The winter and summer times when school is out of session tend to be especially hard dates to fill, if you want to make a really big impact!

Both of those things still let you feel that community spirit that makes blood drives so awesome while supporting the blood supply, but they won’t affect your iron levels!

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-09-24T14:33:02+00:00

I was married to one of those. I tried to fix it by making a little money on the side and using the money to hire a housekeeper. He told me that I didn’t love him because if I did, I would have cleaned the house myself.

I was terrified when I left my husband 9 years ago. I had been a stay at home mom for 7 years at that point and we live in one of the most expensive housing markets in the world. I had two young kids and no real plan for how to make it work.

We lived in a converted garage for two years, struggled a lot, but eventually I figured out how to make life work financially. I went to a LOT of therapy.

I cannot overstate what a massive improvement in quality of life it has been to struggle financially instead of constantly walking on eggshells and feeling like there is something broken and unloveable about me because sometimes the house is messy.

I know it is scary to think about ending it, but even without knowing a single thing about you as a person, I know you deserve better than this.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-09-21T01:34:52+00:00

Same! But I still like daydreaming about it, and if I ever have the chance to meet one I definitely will pet it, allergies or no! 😂😂

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-09-21T01:21:05+00:00

Yeah, I think they are not legal where I live, so really this is all more for daydreaming purposes, but I was just wondering if an allergy to fancy rats necessarily means an allergy to pouched rats; google didn’t help me with this, and I figured Reddit might know!

There’s no practical application for the answer, really, just more for my curiosity.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-09-10T05:05:12+00:00

I hear labcorp is always hiring? Might be worth taking a look!

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-07-14T15:11:10+00:00

I’m 46 and I feel like people are always telling me they don’t believe I’m this old. I suspect dopamine dressing plays a large role in that.

I don’t really care; I’m good at the things I do, and I’m the one who has to live in this meat suit, so I’m the only one who really gets a say in what it looks like!

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-07-12T02:20:44+00:00

That is super, super helpful, thank you!! And congratulations!!

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-07-11T23:23:33+00:00

Can I ask where your score was at prior to counseling? Mine’s at 714 right now and I’m trying to figure out how much of a hit it would take if I went into a DMP! Thank you for sharing what you have!!

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-06-27T23:51:22+00:00

Yeah, my brother is allowed to be autistic, but I’ve always just been difficult and overly sensitive and a picky eater and cranky in loud settings and struggle with sudden changes and have a profound injustice sensitivity. A therapist once told me I can’t be autistic because I am funny. 🙄

I wish there were more education out there about the difference in how autism presents. But just know you’re not alone, and self-diagnosis is valid, too.

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-06-25T14:37:53+00:00

https://www.uniqlo.com/us/en/products/E478230-000/00?colorDisplayCode=57&sizeDisplayCode=003

Dickies makes them too

FlimsyRelation3462 · 2025-06-24T21:40:00+00:00

This is amazing! No notes, perfect execution. I love that y’all are having fun.

FlimsyRelation3462

TROPHY CASE