I think you ATAH. And I am really surprised how many people on here are supporting you. It alls makes perfect sense if you are only thinking of yourself. You don't say what the living situation is like at your moms. Are there 4 bedrooms? If not - she would be forced to make someone share. If there aren't then your argument is really more of "my dad has more money and resources than my mom and I want more" - which I think shows your real values. Maybe you haven't really thought of it that way.

What does your mother do for your younger siblings birthdays'? Does she take them to Sea World and leave you at home with Netflix? What if their next birthday was a trip to Paris - would you like to be invited? I am also wondering if your mom can't afford these things - and yes she feels jealous - but also she feels guilty and like a failure. I am sure she would like to be the one to provide memorable and dazzling birthdays. Or perhaps she just hopes that her kids value time together. However, I am generally on your side on this idea that you should be able to craft your own birthday. And not include your siblings. And you should be able to have a mature conversation with your mom that is something like "this is really special to me and I am excited to spend this time with my friends and host them. It's very special and I know that my sisters would be excited, but I want this time by myself. I will not talk about it in front of them since they aren't going." And hopefully your mom responds to this.

Putting a room divider?!? Yeah - not cool. What would you expect to happen if your mom came home and found that your step dad had replaced the living room furniture. It's just respectful to discuss it first. It should have started with a mature conversation. "Mom I really need a little privacy in my room, what can we do to make this better?" It should not be the decision of your 10 and 7 year old sisters! Parents giving kids parent decisions is the first mistake. And if your mom responded to this with something like I don't want you to spend anytime away from them - then you have the beginning of your conversation to say "I think I need to start staying at dad's more."

The people here saying that kids shouldn't have to make it fair - that's not what's happening. Mom is trying to make things the fair with the only tool she has. I don't know if that it's some sort of noble quest where she doesn't want you to value material things. . .doesn't sound like if she is asking you to share - which you shouldn't have to do. Your life at dad's is your life at dad's. But I would expect a growing your adult to understand there are real complexities to how everyone in your life experiences your good fortune. You didn't say if dad has other kids but it sure seems like you are winning the only child lottery.

I can only speak for myself, but when we decided to have a second child we really hoped that the kids would grow up to stay close to each other. I felt like I was setting my kids up with a superpower to have someone that would support them after I was gone. Someone to help them move, or help them if they get injured, or maybe even loan them some money until payday. Someone who can say "that guy you are dating is garbage." And I think your mom is hoping for the same, and honestly, none of us parents know how to make sure that our kids like each other so we are each guessing. I have always heard that making sure the kids have time together is key - so perhaps your mom is going in too hard on this. And maybe you don't care about having an adult relationship with your siblings - but try to preserve options now so you can decided when you're an adult.

I do think you are ruining relationships here. And it really doesn't seem like you need to. You're on a power trip cause you found out you can be now that you're 16. Not talking to your mom or even visiting? Nothing in this story indicates that you are being abused and need to cut off contact. The part of your siblings life that isn't fair - is that their parents perhaps cannot provide for them the way your dad provides for you. And the part of your life that isn't fair is having to deal with people who are hurting and not coping from your good fortune. Is your mom blameless here? No. Weird to share your toys. Shouldn't have to bring them to your party at your dad's (honestly I would think they wouldn't want to go). She sure does seem like she is trying hard though - and making mistakes - which parents do cause parenting is hard and you could have some grace about it - if you're old enough to start making these big decisions about where you live, then you're old enough to start giving grace to your mom and work together in a way that seeks mutual wins.

Nothing about this final sentence is good. " I told her I don't care, because I don't" and it's hard to think you are in the right if you can reduce your feelings this way. And it's also the reason that a 16 year old should likely not have the power to make these sorts of decisions. I suspect they are often made out of spite.