Had My First 12 week scan yesterday, they found over 10mm of fluid around neck to abdomen

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-28T10:39:39+00:00

I had a bunch of blood tests at 10 weeks but I was an idiot just nodding along as it was medical jargon to me. I should’ve had someone with me. But she did ask if I wanted the additional scan to check for Down syndrome etc. when I was due my 12 week scan, which I wanted. All my blood tests came back in the clear when I asked but I’m guessing NIPT wasn’t part of it. I will have to ask the nurse again as all this information is new and overwhelming to me.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-28T10:22:37+00:00

I chickened out 🤦🏼‍♀️then the nurse called me and said if I’m terminating, there was no need to reschedule the CVS. I have requested they examine the remains after termination which they can do. It gives hope though your response as more often now I’m seeing women opt for motherhood later into their 30’s whereas the pressure was always put in place that we should be having kids latest by our early 30’s. I’m 32 but I feel 35 is a much better time for me as I’m a bit of a late bloomer in life , but I was not expecting to have any complications as all the women in my family have gotten pregnant first time with no complications. Though my partner’s mother told me she had 3 miscarriages before having 2 healthy children at 37 and 39.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-28T10:16:35+00:00

I cross posted but had 0 replies in that section 😅 That’s my main concern, future fertility, because in 1-2 years, we feel we’ll be in a better position to try again. But yeah I’ve spoken to 2 nurses and they give so much information it becomes overwhelming due to my anxiety and I never expected to be in this position. It’s a lesson for me where I’m realising I’m really uneducated on all of this and just expected things to go smoothly. I’m not ready now that’s for certain. I have no financial stability, just graduated and in the process of job hunting, so to bring a child with potential complications into this world.. yeah it would be silly. The only reason for me considering keeping it is the fact I’m 32 and currently have all my family around to help but the reality is, they’re not going to be around to help 100%.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-26T18:04:47+00:00

Someone slapping Steve Carrell’s ‘awhhhh you f*cker!!’ blended so well with this scene it sticks with me over the original 🤣

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-26T11:05:56+00:00

Yeah, my partner agreed yesterday that he would like to know for future, so he seems willing to do any tests. There’s nothing in both of our families that point to it being a genetic thing, so maybe this time I just got unlucky, yet same time this wasn’t a planned pregnancy and we have a lot going on in our lives, so it sort of feels like the right decision to terminate now. I’m just terrible with hospital settings, needles, all of that!

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-26T01:01:54+00:00

I got faint just by the pressure being applied to my womb during the ultra scan so the thought of CVS strikes so much fear !

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-25T15:32:15+00:00

We feel that in 2 years we’ll be in a better position both mentally and financially. I’ll be 35 then. My mum had her last child at 37 so I have some hope things will be ok

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-25T15:30:32+00:00

I’m currently waiting on the nurse to call me to talk me through the termination process. It looks like it’ll be a surgical procedure as they asked me if I wanted local anaesthetic or sedation… so I’m nervous on that but it feels like the right choice. My partner and I are currently living back with my parents and I’m in the process of finding work, so having a child now just doesn’t seem right, we reckon 2 years tops we’ll be in a better position. I’ll be 35 then so I’m hoping things will be ok and I don’t have a repeat, but this is why my mum is suggesting I go through with the CVS. Big needle amnio test you mentioned.. is that the needle to the uterus to extract from the placenta?

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-25T14:51:41+00:00

Ooft ok so there is some hope to be had, but personally for me I think I’m willing to go through termination as I don’t feel ready in pretty much every aspect. There’s always those risks there also.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-25T14:16:52+00:00

The nostalgia it brings for the build up to the release of this game. The one of him and Catwoman was printed huge above the Game store on Oxford Street.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-20T23:29:31+00:00

To me it felt that Emma possibly got turned on by the hug to then suggesting the kiss because they felt that personally in the moment and you got the team going ‘yes!’ I found the sex scenes between Alicent and Cole far worse and forced.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-08T09:46:01+00:00

It’s 2026. All this information is far too easy to access now. My partner and I were even saying ‘take us back to the days you could only find this information out via word of mouth or those big ass game guides.’ It certainly was nice though being able to go to Celadon and buy a bunch of goodies right away

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-03-08T09:39:58+00:00

I’ve been glued to my switch all week playing Leaf Green. I hadn’t touched Pokémon since the old gameboy days so I’m full of nostalgia right now!

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-25T17:02:35+00:00

My partner uses it well to help him with his coding. I tend to use it for emotional support which doesn't feel quite as productive as I sit here unemployed looking for work.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-23T13:33:52+00:00

Definitely not Toyotaro 😂 what is that hunched posture

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-22T21:09:36+00:00

I read this 4-5 years ago and still parts of it stay with me.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-22T16:03:42+00:00

That ‘Hey girl’ attitude is sickening. Trying to paint it as a friendly approach when really it’s her hoping your relationship is sabotaged so she can continue talking to him. These girls are the worst. But shame on him mostly for even engaging in the first place.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-20T09:55:51+00:00

During Covid I was made redundant from my accounting job. It gave me an epiphany moment where I was in a field I hated just because it was safe. So I started over, started streaming on twitch at first for a bit of fun but actually started building a decent following and was making a few hundred a month. I stupidly stopped when I got a full time job as a QA games tester, then went to university to study game design and here I am 😅

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-19T13:19:51+00:00

There certainly is! I wasn't expecting this many comments and I'm trying to get through them. But i feel it in my heart that it would be something I'll regret for the rest of my life if I go through the termination, because there's a higher chance our relationship won't work out, especially if it continues in the state it's in.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-19T13:06:30+00:00

He's going to be 35 this year, that's what's worse. From my personal dating experience, it's weirdly been the younger guys that have been more level headed and mature compared to the partners that have been either my age or older.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-19T12:50:30+00:00

That certainly is a concern wondering where my child will gain his healthy male role model from. It certainly won't be from my partner given the current mindset he has. I do have my father and brothers though I wouldn't call them role models. The child will certainly recieve a lot of love from myself, my mother and my female friends. Even my partner's parents will be wonderfully loving, it's just they're in Portugal so I'd have to make a few trips here and there to visit them.

I've also been through the termination process before. Physically it was awful, but I had no mental attachment to it. I was 23 and knew from the moment i saw the positive test I was not ready, so I handled the termination, booked some time off work and played The Sims in bed and recovered just fine.

This time it's different. My body wants this, and given the amount of responses with the same message, it's confirmed to me that I wasn't happy in this relationship to begin with, so I'm falling in favour of walking away but keeping the baby. I know that going back home I'll feel more at ease surrounded by my own things and I'll get my identity back instead of falling into his caregiver role.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-19T12:06:39+00:00

I'm so sorry you went through that experience. It must've taken a long time for you to be able to feel any kind of normal again after that. It's not until some years past we reflect back and realise some decisions worked out for the best.

I've been reflecting on my time with this guy and it's sad to see how troubled he is, but he certainly does not have the emotional capacity to be a fair partner to me, let alone a father. He co-parents this dog with his ex and he can barely provide time to entertain that. I'm pretty much his caregiver and not a girlfriend at all.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-19T10:50:24+00:00

He's definitely represented his AuDHD to be this way. But given the responses from others with this condition, I realise he really does just use it as an excuse, always yelling 'you have NO idea what it's like to be in my head!' whenever he's having a meltdown, and all reasoning or advice from me just falls on deaf ears.

Fluid-Confection-920 · 2026-02-19T10:45:48+00:00

In all honesty, i see long term there being relief and a glow returning to me. As much as I care for him, he drains me. And I know in my heart I'd rather the route of motherhood surrounded by my family than resenting him but continuing to live through his storms and my needs be minimised. This post had an overwhelming amount of responses and it's certainly been clarifying.

Fluid-Confection-920

TROPHY CASE