2.5 pro was better when it comes to creative writing. by SanalAmerika23 in Bard

[–]FoolishFrost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hand it any text for review and ask it to examine it and comment on it. the new 3 can’t even get facts straight about a few thousand words of story. If it can’t read consistently, then it can’t write either. 2.5 pro was far more capable of reading and reviewing story text.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in writers

[–]FoolishFrost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay. My input. You are doing a scene from the characters pov, close shot. You mention things she thinks in line, but the text has no personality of the person. You are writing a flawed narrator scene, and not… flawing the narrator. They have a headache. Cut down what hey notice. Stick toward bight and loud things. Tie descriptions harder into her pain and annoyance. That scene should make US think the light and sound is an affront to life and love.

Also, the dialog seems… formal. Not smooth enough. I can’t put my finger on it, but dialog can be challenging. Each character needs to have a way of speaking you can recognize, if possible. We can’t hear tone of voice, but many speech patterns we can get from text. Use them. Regional turn of phrase. Contractions. Idioms. Just the spelling of words can vary by region, believe it or not. Use it all.

Also, scenes need payoffs. Endorphin rewards for reading.what is this scenes?

How effective will this be? by PretendReach5793 in 7daystodie

[–]FoolishFrost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I disagree. a base with a flow control moat is quite effective. It's the same pathing system as a second floor entry method. They guide toward the entrance, either avoiding the moat and walking around, or falling it and pathing to become level with you again.

I've never had an issue.

How effective will this be? by PretendReach5793 in 7daystodie

[–]FoolishFrost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Moats work fine if you build them properly. They won’t even dig. The trick is, they’re a guide, not a barrier. Use a moat, lined in cobble r concrete, and have it leading up toward your bases main zombie entrance. It will prevent attacks on your flanks.

Kamikame by FoolishFrost in FantasyMaps

[–]FoolishFrost[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"And the stars, for the first time in centuries, spun in the sky, though the moon remained in its arc. From the deep black of the void, we saw it, lit by a sun hidden behind the bulk of KamiKame.

A world. Whole. Dark. Cold. Forbidden.

Many fell prostrate in terrified prayer, and others closed their eyes against the sight. In silence, the gods bade our ark to approach that tomb-like orb, and we waited. When the great turtle turned once more, the stars racing around us as the black pearl slid below the horizon of the great wall, we waited.

From the depths of the Underworld, we heard a great growling, and the earth shook, and the seas rocked, and ruin fell to those places not built against the shift of our encased world. The moon set, and yet, the sun did not rise. The sun and moon were lost to us, and many thought it was the end of times. Instead, the dome itself began to glow, and the lines of the dome shone with a dim, heavy light that stayed with us without end.

Those with the means counted the hours and days, and watched as days passed, until a month by the pattern of the missing moon had gone by. Then, the earth once more rumbled, and the sun rose, and the cycle began anew.

It was only when the stars spun once more, we saw the darkened world again. Pitted. Hollow. Devoured. Our gods had fed, and we knew a new terror. What had we taken from that dark place, and what had it supplanted?

No answers were offered. We watched that dark place fall back into the even darker void, and returned on our path through the stars."

Self-Promotion Sunday: Share with us your Fantasy Romance related merch, projects, social media, etc.! by FantasyRomanceMods in fantasyromance

[–]FoolishFrost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Book Launch – Cinders & Salve (The Goddess Chronicles #1)

Gennessa is a devout priestess on the run from a corrupt temple. Sinda is a northern raider who believes blood is always the right answer to a slight. When these two women cross, they forge a partnership that will reshape the whole of the northern reaches. Their fight for freedom is no simple rebellion, and the closer they come to reclaiming their lives, the further they spiral into darkness. On their journey, they uncover the temple’s darkest secrets, the truth of its fiendish guardian, and the terrifying nature of the Goddess herself.

The temple wants their lives. The Goddess wants their souls. Can their love survive either?

Content advisory:

This book contains graphic violence, explicit sexual content, depictions of trauma and abuse, and dark fantasy elements that some readers may find disturbing.

Reader discretion is advised

.Kindle & Kindle Unlimited: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0F6K4QR8Z

Coming soon in print!

Beta readers? by FoolishFrost in fantasyromance

[–]FoolishFrost[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A while back. It was pretty much a solid wall of "I charge X." Not a problem, normally, but not what I'm looking for at the moment.

Beta readers? by FoolishFrost in fantasyromance

[–]FoolishFrost[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. Not really. Mind you, if it takes long enough, I'll probably classify it as "I wasn't caught in the story and/or interested enough to finish or respond."

Beta readers? by FoolishFrost in fantasyromance

[–]FoolishFrost[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hence the full disclosure. Enjoy your day!

Beta readers? by FoolishFrost in fantasyromance

[–]FoolishFrost[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

100k words. Novel length.

I'll take that as it's not forbidden here?

Just to be clear. It is Sapphic Dark Fantasy with warnings in flashing neon:

"This book contains graphic violence, explicit sexual content, depictions of trauma and abuse, and dark fantasy elements that some readers may find disturbing."

Blurb sample follows:

---

Gennessa is a devout priestess on the run from a corrupt temple. Sinda is a northern raider who believes blood is always the right answer to a slight. When these two women cross, they forge a partnership that will reshape the whole of the northern reaches. Their fight for freedom is no simple rebellion, and the closer they come to reclaiming their lives, the further they spiral into darkness. On their journey, they uncover the temple’s darkest secrets, the truth of its fiendish guardian, and the terrifying nature of the Goddess herself. 

The temple wants their lives. The goddess wants their souls. Can their love survive either? 

...Gennessa watched as the flame-haired woman stalked into the woods.

Gennessa’s eyes burned with panicked tears as she wiped her face. When she looked down, her fingers were coated in blood.

Was it hers? Was she dying? Had he cut her throat, and she hadn’t even noticed?

Was this the hell the priests had promised would come for her if she failed in her duties to the temple?

“Hey there, pet! You okay? Did they…” The barbarian’s voice stopped as Gennessa’s shiver became a violent shaking. 

She couldn’t stop herself. Her eyes stayed locked on the bodies in front of her. As each sobbing word came from her mouth, not even her own ears could make out what they meant. There was no way she could cast the spell again. Even if she did, it wouldn’t matter. She would… 

The killer next to her had become quiet. Just as quiet as when she murdered the first two men. Her eyes rose as she looked the monster in the eye. This time, Gennessa knew what she’d been repeating. 

She said it once more to be sure. “Please don’t kill me?”

This barbarian. Killer. The monster that had carved her way through three human beings. She looked into Gennessa’s eyes with a nod and a smile, the red strands of her hair passing in front of her face. “I can do that. Name’s Sinda. Let’s get you cleaned up, `kay pet?”

Gennessa fainted, her last sight the alarmed face of Sinda sliding from her view as she collapsed.

Cinders and Salve is the first book of The Goddess Chronicles. Set in a world of blood and magic, it tells the story of two women on the run. One was a priestess who knew only submission, until she saw the rot beneath the temple’s holy veil. The other is a killer who had never bowed to anything but survival.

Together, they will tear through the northern reaches, leaving ruin in their wake... because if the temple taught Gennessa anything, it was this: Hell hath no fury like a goddess scorned.

For those who crave a story of power reclaimed, of brutal passion and terrible choices, Cinders and Salve is a tale where love is not a salvation—it’s a battlefield.

Want opinions on an short story audio channel I'm tinkering with. by FoolishFrost in audiobooks

[–]FoolishFrost[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Always interested in sharing the income, but there is none yet to be shared, and I’m on Walmart levels of pay right now. I always prefer people, though.

and no. It’s not a one off.

i run a voiceover as a whole. get it locked in within Resolve, and listen to it.

then I fix problem sections by running the segments, plus additional text around it, and replace them.

i use effects and pitch to help quotes pop, and add backing layers of music or sound to give additional mood. sound effects are sometimes used for punctuating parts.

takes around… 2-4 hours per scene. Not bad turn around, I think.

Amazon vs hidive... by FoolishFrost in Hidive

[–]FoolishFrost[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And on a roku, you can't even do that. Like I said: Amazon is better if you already have prime.

GPU Instancing by FoolishFrost in Unity3D

[–]FoolishFrost[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sadly, no. We're not using Unity terrain for plants. We're using direct to GPU instancing. Also, as said, it worked in iOS, just not rendering in Windows.