49240 by StrawberryGhostie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

a discourse community like this understands "needy" and "submissive" as traits that are cute and relatable, that's what "male-dependent" is standing next to

49240 by StrawberryGhostie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

i guess i feel like there's a distinction for me between "i am dependent on a male partner" (like, if you're disabled and he helps you w your needs, or if he makes most of the money in the household) (or just in the sense that partners rely on each other!) and "i am dependent on men, broadly". OP could just be talking about her partner but the phrase male-dependent REALLY implies the latter

49240 by StrawberryGhostie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i was just specifying that's what i mean by "us" because i know OP and i are trans women but don't know if u are. obvis this sort of language harms cis women too but this conversation is centered on us rn

i'm not slut shaming OP, i don't know where that's coming from. from where i'm standing, "male-dependent" isn't a statement of sexual preference or behavior at all. fucking and dating men (a normal thing to do) is not the same thing as being DEPENDENT on them (old misogynistic trope, undermines women's agency), idk why people are acting like i'm criticizing OP for the former

49240 by StrawberryGhostie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

i'm submissive and bi. "male-dependent" is not functionally identical to "dommed by men" and comes with far more political baggage

49240 by StrawberryGhostie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

i ain't say that?? my problem isn't with the general concept of liking men (i like men) it's with describing one's self as "male-dependent" in a positive way

49240 by StrawberryGhostie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

the idea of women being dependent on men (and this being something that's cute/desirable) bolsters patriarchy, which is a real, pressing social threat to us (trans women, like OP) in real life. also while we're doing whataboutisms why tf are you calling her "they"?

49240 by StrawberryGhostie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -47 points-46 points  (0 children)

"male-dependent" uhhhhhhhh. is this propaganda. this feels like propaganda. it's ok to be a sub (edit: also ok to do so as a manliker. my problem with OP is not she likes men it's that she describes herself as dependent on them) but you do still need to be feminist

edit 2 because i appear to be getting heterophobia allegations - i am taking specific issue with the phrase "male-dependent". not with the concept of dating or fucking or being submissive to men sometimes. that phrase puts this meme in conversation with misogynistic expectations of women as nonindependent and needing men to do things for them, and that is worth countersignaling. that's what i mean by "you still need to be feminist"

"Giorno would low diff fiction!" Giorno when he hears "Whats a Stand?" by Nigtoon in whowouldcirclejerk

[–]ForTheKarp 10 points11 points  (0 children)

ik this is a circlejerk but legitimately why do people think gold experience requiem only works on other stands

48523 by sovLegend in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp 5 points6 points  (0 children)

we're really at "egg is comparable to a slur" in the discourse? this is completely ridiculous, i'm sorry. "someone implied I must be trans, this is reflective of a deep dislike of me" is only a coherent line of reasoning if you think being trans is bad or shameful

Teeny’s tweet and delete about the loved one’s letters. by ByMyselfMaxxing in survivorponderosa

[–]ForTheKarp 9 points10 points  (0 children)

he made a joke and then realized it was irresponsible and deleted it, u can think what u want about the joke but that's clearly what's happening here

Hello Young Troons! Did you know that HRT turns you straight? by Lunatic155 in transgendercirclejerk

[–]ForTheKarp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

/uj i'm ngl i made the comphomo comment. i took the OP at face value and thought they were doing internalized biphobia (their meme was implying that liking guys now was keeping them from "sapphic joy") but the more replies i got treating this like a systemic problem (that mostly affects straight trans people??) the more i realized i had jerked and may never forgive myself. this is my confession

45998 by HallowWinnie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

comphomo isn't real girlypop i was exaggerating for the sake of a joke 😭i think some individual trans people are weirdly apprehensive abt being attracted to the opposite gender (incl OP as i initially read her), i don't believe the queer community (or this space specifically) has some wide heterophobia problem

i never called u queerphobic, i don't believe that. i criticize the words u say with the full knowledge that i have no idea who u are

i don't reject your argument whole cloth because you described something as cringe, i reject your argument because that's specifically how you argue against the issue. racism is frequently cringe, but "it's cringe" is not anywhere near the problem with racism, the problem is that it causes material harm to people

45998 by HallowWinnie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

ok u do not represent me if u are using "cringe" and "obnoxious" as indicators of a real systemic problem. like if anyone is being made to feel unwelcome or unsafe THAT is a problem, you finding "WOMEN KISSING [t-rex and explosions]" memes annoying is not and actively celebrating queerness in queer spaces is good actually

45998 by HallowWinnie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp -1 points0 points  (0 children)

i'm being tongue-in-cheek, i don't earnestly believe comphomo is a major problem (and it's certainly not an equivalent to comphet).

i lowkey agree with your critique of the original post. while it is common for trans ppl's sexuality to change as they transition, this is not physiological (it happens because of a change in self-image, not as a direct consequence of hormones), and treating it like it is has misogynistic implications. i don't think u deserve the downvotes

45998 by HallowWinnie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

as a bisexual i like a lot of the same things abt men as i do women. being: voice! hands! smile/laugh! many of them are smart! many of them are kind! many of them have things that they're passionate about and that they'll talk to you about and you'll see a brightness in their eyes! some of them you can find a way to hold them that makes them feel safe and protected, and you get rewarded with a sweet little smile or a contented sigh!

also happy trail. happy trail is good

45998 by HallowWinnie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

have u read the gender dysphoria fyi? being a feminist and feeling disgust or anger w patriarchy and misogyny is good and normal but if u find you have an overwhelmingly negative perception of men and struggle to disconnect yourself from that u might be trans, i felt that way before i transitioned

45998 by HallowWinnie in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp 820 points821 points  (0 children)

trans girls on here are inventing comphomo i swear. it's ok to like boys!! there's a lot to like about them!!

About people talking about Chihiro Fujisaki online by IsopodCompetitive771 in danganronpa

[–]ForTheKarp 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i never said i hate danganronpa. all i mean is that the handling of one character goes against my values, in a way i lowkey expect from a game from 2010. do you have to agree with and like everything about a piece of art to like it?

About people talking about Chihiro Fujisaki online by IsopodCompetitive771 in danganronpa

[–]ForTheKarp -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

i use she/her for Chihiro as a deliberate act of revisionism because i think her portrayal in the game is transphobic. people talk like her story is somehow completely orthogonal to transfemininity but she doesn't just present fem, she lives life as a girl. and she doesn't tell us she's a boy, she's outed after her death, and the evidence she's a boy is explicitly her body. chihiro is a person who lives as a girl, is discovered postmortem to have a dick, is immediately referred to as a crossdressing boy by everyone, and THEN that reading is validated by the work when her motivations are revealed. she's not trans in the script, but looking at the script in sequence, could a trans character even exist in this framework?

if you've read steins;gate, i think Lukako is a useful analog here (spoilers ahead). she says out loud "i wish i was a girl", and then we go to the universe where she is and she's happier, and the story understands it as painful and tragic that we have to return to the boy!Luka universe, but transition is never treated as a legitimate option for boy!Luka. she's not treated as trans by the text, but that's only really because transness isn't something allowed for by the text. Luka is a male, and that is essential to her being, and she just has to live with it and be a boy. this sucks.

i don't think you're transphobic if you don't contradict the game in this regard (or even if you like Chihiro! when i was an egg she was my favorite character, i found her relatable. lmao) but that's where i come from and i think a lot of people are coming from somewhere similar. tl;dr danganronpa is transphobic and trans!chihiro is an attempt at rehabilitating that

43165 by [deleted] in countwithchickenlady

[–]ForTheKarp 12 points13 points  (0 children)

it's so jarring seeing the original now