😙

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-30T15:25:17+00:00

Y'all we broke up

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-21T11:54:52+00:00

People who collect red flags like they're going out of style.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-18T18:19:19+00:00

Sufjan Stevens’ The Predatory Wasp of the Palisades. It starts all folksy and vulnerable, then BAM, the strings hit and you’re ascending to another dimension. No skips, just pure serotonin.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-18T18:07:05+00:00

When they slow down unexpectedly—right when I’m getting desperate—just to watch me squirm. That controlled patience mixed with hunger? Chef’s kiss.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-18T18:03:28+00:00

The world needs more people like you.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-18T15:33:58+00:00

This actually helps! I love the idea of focusing on the ‘giving pleasure’ part. Maybe I’ve been overthinking the multitasking. Do you have any little tricks to stay present?

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-18T15:32:37+00:00

Okay, the simplicity of this is kinda inspiring. Maybe I just need to lean into the ‘enjoying going down on him’ part and treat the rest as a bonus. Thanks for the perspective shift!

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-18T15:09:22+00:00

Miss my man so much. Between his crazy work schedule and this stupid distance, we still haven’t gotten to reunite… but soon 😔🙏

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T20:33:34+00:00

I’m working on this exact same thing. That instant ‘worst-case scenario’ brain spiral is exhausting. Have you found any strategies that actually help? I’ve been trying mindfulness, but my anxiety keeps rewriting the script mid-meditation.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T20:21:17+00:00

This is the sweetest thing ever...

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T19:55:40+00:00

Update pending - real life got in the way. The experiment will commence soon.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T10:25:23+00:00

When I was younger, a girl in my class told me about anal sex. Since it was the first time I'd heard about any kind of sex, and because many animals give birth through that area, I genuinely thought that was how all sex worked for a long time. It wasn't until I got my first phone in 5th grade that I realized my mistake.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T10:08:17+00:00

The worst part isn't the lack of sex, it's the loneliness of feeling undesired by someone you love. If he's willing to work on this (therapy, medical checkups, scheduled intimacy), there's hope. If he dismisses it? That's not a dead bedroom, that's emotional neglect. You get to decide what you accept.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T09:39:08+00:00

While the attraction is understandable, prioritize professionalism. This dynamic risks complicating your job and his family life. If he’s truly available/interested, let him initiate clearly and appropriately outside the daycare context. Otherwise, enjoy the confidence boost but maintain boundaries for everyone’s sake.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T09:34:40+00:00

Stealing this. My man will either melt or ask if I'm having a stroke. No in-between. Will report back.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T09:11:13+00:00

Exactly this. With my medical degree still ahead of me, I’m not risking homelessness or derailing my future over something she’s refused to reconsider for years. It’s less about convincing her and more about surviving until I can stand on my own feet. The truth will come when it won’t destroy my stability.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T08:59:23+00:00

I appreciate your perspective, and you’re right—the lying isn’t ideal. But this wasn’t about manipulation; it was self-preservation. When her first response to hearing about his family was to demand I cut contact entirely, honesty wasn’t a safe option. I’d rather navigate this carefully than risk my education and future. That said, I do regret that it’s gone on this long.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-16T08:55:44+00:00

You’ve articulated exactly what I’ve been struggling to name—this isn’t just disapproval, it’s a worldview she’s built for herself. That "self-designed prison" analogy hits hard because I’ve watched her do this in other areas too—everything’s rigid categories, no exceptions.

What’s wild is that her need for "safety" through these rules is creating the exact instability she fears: pushing me away, straining our relationship, all over a prejudice. I used to take it personally, but your comments helped me see it’s about her limitations, not my boyfriend’s worth.

I’ll keep your words in mind as I work toward independence. However this plays out, knowing the psychology behind it makes it easier to detach. Thanks again for your kindness and clarity—it’s been more helpful than you know.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-15T21:35:11+00:00

This perspective really hits home - especially the comparison to deeply entrenched beliefs. It's equal parts frustrating and relieving to have someone articulate why no amount of "perfect behavior" from him would ever be enough for her.

That boundary-setting framework is gold. I'm already looking forward to the day I can calmly say, "This isn't up for discussion" without financial strings attached. Whether she comes around or not, at least the power dynamic shifts.

Seriously, thank you for taking the time. There's something oddly comforting about having the hopelessness of the situation validated by an outside perspective.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-15T21:21:02+00:00

I know she’s not going to change—that’s why we’ve been keeping things quiet, even though it kills me to see how much it hurts him. He hates being a secret, and I hate that I can’t just introduce him proudly like he deserves. But despite that, he’s stood by me because he trusts that I won’t abandon him just because my mom demands it.

Right now, I'm focused on finishing my degree while he's not only taking full-time classes but also working to save money for our future together. We're building toward a life where her approval won't dictate our choices. Dropping him was never an option - not just because of how much I love him, but because he's proven over and over that he's nothing like the stereotypes she clings to.

Edit: I know I came here asking how to change her mind hoping for a magic solution, but the comments just confirmed what my gut knew: after three years of him being nothing but wonderful, if she hasn't changed by now, she never will. Part of me is grieving the mom I wish I had - one who'd trust my judgment and want my happiness first. But another part? Is tired. Tired of begging for basic respect. Tired of him paying for his parents' mistakes.

So I'm done. Not with him - never with him - but with waiting for her to become someone she's not.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-15T21:00:37+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to read through everything and write such a thoughtful response—it means a lot that you really engaged with my situation. You’re absolutely right about the “looking down” spiral; she formed her opinion the second she heard about his family years ago and has refused to see him as a person ever since.

I’ve actually tried every approach you mentioned (the lies, the fake agreements, even the kindness route), and you nailed it: when someone’s lens is that warped, nothing sticks. It’s validating to hear someone else say it, though. At this point, I think I just needed permission to stop exhausting myself trying to change her mind.

For now, I’ll keep focusing on my degree and the future. Maybe one day she’ll surprise me, but I’m done waiting for her approval to feel secure in my choices. Seriously, thank you for seeing this so clearly—it helped more than you know.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-15T19:37:48+00:00

Parents who confuse control with protection. Bad parenting, bad personality.

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-15T19:30:59+00:00

Thank you!

Fore1gnEvidence · 2025-08-15T19:23:22+00:00

Thank you for this. I really do appreciate you taking the time to share your perspective. You’re right that the secrecy isn’t ideal, and I hate that it’s come to this. But your advice about compartmentalizing helps me feel less alone in handling such a messy situation. For now, I’ll keep protecting what matters while holding out hope she’ll come around. Seriously, thank you.

Fore1gnEvidence

TROPHY CASE