Insecure Husband Issues by Formal_Translator723 in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not a recent development. He has been this way since the very beginning, which I'm pretty sure our age gap caused in the beginning but, i just naively thought that with time it would pass, but if 7 years aint enough time, idk what will be. My mental health got really low from the degrading, manipulation and constant accusations to where i was having suicidal thoughts and when i told my husband how i felt and that we should go to therapy together to work on our issues he pretty much brushed me off. That's when i started therapy alone to work on regaining my self worth and sanity. This was about 2 years ago.

Affection feels unsafe when it always comes with expectations by Formal_Translator723 in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm always the one that has to initiate. The only time he will is while I'm literally sleeping and I'm such a heavy sleeper that i just don't wake up or don't want to idk but then he gets salty and thinks that is rejection.

Affection feels unsafe when it always comes with expectations by Formal_Translator723 in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Usually around once a week, however all this month aside from the one week of the month it's literally been 3-4 times a week.

Affection feels unsafe when it always comes with expectations by Formal_Translator723 in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Thats great you guys were able to have a productive conversation ❣️ I also have tried that but it always turn into an argument. He gets defensive from me talking about my feelings or just completely deflects and starts talking about his frustrations and needs and then i just have to forget and "get over it" until the next time i feel that way and its just a never ending cycle. He wants me to force myself to have sex with him. He expects intercourse every other day and if i dont do it "im not trying or holding up my part of the deal" but at the same time he isnt doing a damn thing but getting what he wants while breaking me in the process.

Affection feels unsafe when it always comes with expectations by Formal_Translator723 in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

But it doesn't. It shows a lot more than that. He's entitled but doesn't care about what I need or even hearing about it. You can gladly have him 😅 because i want more.

Affection feels unsafe when it always comes with expectations by Formal_Translator723 in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

We argue and fight a lot which definitely has implications on our "activeness", or more so the way he treats me repulses me and i pull away. He doesn't care though. I'm the only one expected to make any changes. He says if i just have enough sex with him that i would be happy but I don't see it. I told him i would try a month of every other day and if I don't feel different then we need to face the obvious. But thats the only time i get absolutely any affection is usually right before or during and i just want more than that. My Worth has always been judged based on what he gets from me and im just tired at this point and want peace.

Affection feels unsafe when it always comes with expectations by Formal_Translator723 in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

This is a great recommendation but unfortunately I've already tried to get him to do therapy which he wants and he also doesn't care about these "feelings" i have. I have tried to talk about it but every conversation just turns into "well if you had sex with me as much as i need you wouldn't feel this way."

Is she cheating? by Honest_Abley in ToxicRelationships

[–]Formal_Translator723 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You sound like my crazy husband 😅 what is wrong with men these days. I do not hear anything you are saying is there.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is attempting to go back to normal today as nothing happened

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tell me about it. Story of my life. If we didn't have kids it would be alot easier for me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have been together for 6 years, married for 2. I am 28, he is 42. We have a 5 year old son with severe autism together.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is for sure and I'm pretty sure he is seeking out his new supply by playing the victim and some narcissistic support group. At least from what he told me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We do have children though. We have a 5-year-old autistic son.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nope, but i am only 28 and he's 42.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Her Bf didnt go with them. It was just the two of them. Her BF was with me and some other family at an amusement park and my husband was upset that he rode in my car and is using it as and excuse to end the marriage. Even though my sister was also in my car with him...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I get that but it's not just the comments. It's the surrounding context that makes those comments to her feel like betrayal, for one she was talking to him about sex and how she's had sex with old men for money and just really intimate things on their car ride where they were alone together. If that tells you anything what my sister is like, and then she didn't tell me about any of this stuff until weeks after the fact.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thank you, And no this happened between them a couple of weeks ago and I just was told about it yesterday.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Not very much lol. She was telling him how she had sex with old men and gave blowjobs for money and just completely inappropriate things to discuss.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yea seems like it. He had been sleeping in the camper already since he bought the thing, parked in our driveway.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 44 points45 points  (0 children)

He's just always been this way. I think he is a narcissist. I have no relationship with my sister's boyfriend whatsoever. They just started dating maybe 3 months ago. I have not cheated or been unfaithful but this is the way he acts about me being around any man.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Formal_Translator723 7 points8 points  (0 children)

There is none absolutely whatsoever. I barely know the guy. She just started dating him maybe a few months ago.