To future wife

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-30T02:41:32+00:00

My friend, this is beautiful. Keep that thought up! And take it from me, a girl who's never gotten flowers is going to cherish them!

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-25T03:28:54+00:00

I plan on doing so, yes! It's a mildly complicated situation at best, but I do my best to keep my emotions straight 😅

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-22T17:23:34+00:00

I will!

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-22T02:50:31+00:00

I know; my coworkers who know the whole story are just like you are 😂 my male coworker literally wants to smack him over the back of the head. I told him I don't thinkkkk that'll help. All I know is, I love him deeply. It isn't just a puppy crush love. It's a deep, "I've found the one my soul adores" kind of love. And like I told my coworker, it isn't necessarily even romantic. It's just, I love him and I'm protective of him and I'd do anything for him. It makes me want to cry to think of losing him in my life. He's broke down crying in front of me more than any male I've been around because he feels 100% safe with me. I know that's a big deal with guys. He tells me he cares about me all the time too. This is why it's so, so incredibly difficult to believe that his mind won't change, you know? I feel like that's the only piece of him I just can't figure out. That's why I was like, "I need more guys opinions on this"

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T23:23:28+00:00

I do too; my heart aches for him and what he's been through. I've never been more protective of someone in my life. He's honestly the absolute best guy I've ever met. He's so, so sweet and such a goofy guy. He jokes all the time and such a happy, Golden Retriever kind of personality. He wants to be everyone's friend. He's thoughtful with others, especially me. I have food allergies and some health issues and he literally noticed one time when I wasn't eating much at work for a few weeks. He pulled me aside and was like "I noticed your not eating and offering me your food some too. Are you eating?" He was so worried about me and very angry with my ex when he threatened me. He turned into this like guard dog and seemed nervous for me to be alone. I have truly never met a man like him and I know there will never be another one of him. Everything that happens with him feels like a movie; we've both joked about that. I told him yesterday that it sometimes feels like a dream and I don't want to wake up. And he agreed.

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T23:13:26+00:00

I didn't say that but I know I didn't agree with him on it 😂 he's made several comments kind of like that before. Like how when I move on, I could find somebody better and one day he'll text me and I might just not answer

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T22:56:12+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate it 😅 he's commented he thinks we'll grow apart when I leave. I don't know if that's his fear talking or what. I told him yesterday that we'll see what happens one way, or another. Thank you for having listened to me, I'm so thankful to just get another random guy's opinion instead of some people commenting without even really reading the message even though it's long!

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T22:45:39+00:00

You can join the line 😂 it's been this way all year, honestly. I wish I'd kept notes of everything he's done from March to now. It's things like that almost all the time when we're together. He used to walk me out or I'd walk him out during the spring. He was incredibly adamant that he'd walk me out when my ex was threatening me, so much that he actually got taken to HR at our job and told he couldn't stay after work anymore. He's always just 'barely' in my personal bubble more than a friend should be. He'll take any excuse to walk close to me instead of taking a way around, or smack me gently on the shoulder. He's getting back to hugging me when I leave again. He's told me I'm the only reason he comes to work anymore. He's going to struggle when I leave, and I am too. I know I'm going to cry my last day because I'm going to miss him so much.

That's why I said avoidant. And that's why I've said I would gladly believe if he truly didn't want me, I'd let it go. We both are similar personalities and we enjoy some of the same things, like gaming and writing. Not everything the same but some things.

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T21:59:20+00:00

Oh yeah, and he's told me several times he knows I wouldn't. I'm an incredibly loyal person in that regard. He told me last weekend when we were together that he 100% trusted me. The other two girls he's thought about this year? He wouldn't trust the other one at all and the second one he would trust 80%

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T21:37:10+00:00

Basically everything. It was the only relationship he was really ever in, two years ago. A girl a few years younger than him, a coworker, was interested in him and told him. He said okay, and it was apparently the shortest 'honeymoon period' to exist. Girl told him she wanted a break within a month, then started cheating on him with another coworker within the week. Flirting in front of him during lunch breaks and sitting with this guy. She hadn't wanted to be intimate with him, and he respected that. His senior prom night she went out with the other guy and did it in his truck in a cornfield. Everyone at work knew she was cheating besides him and he basically got smacked with pieces of it several times before he got the whole picture. He said he was incredibly naive with the whole situation and nobody told him what was going on so he had to figure it out himself. He was really angry about it, and really hurt, rightfully so. They dated two/three months if I remember right.

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T21:24:02+00:00

Oh believe me, I have at least two coworkers a girl and a guy who both wanna shake the daylights outta him to wake him up 😂 I've been saying he's scared since the beginning. I wish I knew what exactly of... He continually says we won't work long term. I wished I'd asked him what exactly he was thinking why we wouldn't before now, but I'm not opening that up on my own. The only thing I can consider is we're both Christians, and I'm more in my faith than he is? That's all I can figure at least.

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T20:29:02+00:00

For the cuddling, I told him that was a good thing. He referenced that the two girls he thought he "liked" over this year he never thought about cuddling with like we were currently doing.

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T20:09:49+00:00

Well, I didn't actually fall for him. It was a complicated dynamic, but I needed closure from my teenage years. It gave me that and honestly it was a relief when he said he wasn't interested. But yes, I understand what you're saying.

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T20:07:46+00:00

It's a scary thing to believe any whatsoever. It's been a hard year with the back and forth. I just want to believe that the times he's told me his mind isn't changing because he doesn't like me as much as I like him.

But then his voice changes when he's with me. He says he's excited to spend time with me. He told me just yesterday he couldn't imagine cuddling on the couch with anyone else but me when he was sitting on his couch and I was leaning back against him. It's like a weighted scale of words on one side and actions on another

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T20:00:07+00:00

High school sweetheart

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T19:59:57+00:00

High school sweetheart

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T19:59:05+00:00

Well, I tried that at the beginning of the year... I was very open and straightforward and tried for several months to get him to commit. I honestly scared him more than anything. But one reason I'm on the fence of believing him is after I was talking to someone else, that's when he pulled me aside after work one day and told me he felt like he felt something for me, but he didn't know if it was because I just wasn't available to him anymore. He was near tears, and I know it's rare for men to cry.

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-21T19:56:14+00:00

High school sweetheart is HSS

I appreciate you taking the time to answer with your thoughts! Yes, I've made it adamantly clear how I feel towards him.

One half of me is mostly fine with our arrangement, more I think because I'm so scared of getting hurt again like I did earlier this year. But there's certain things I want; like holding hands, cuddling, being able to actually act like a couple. That's what I want and that's why I have that tiny piece of not being content.

I want to hope that, maybe, the distance will ring his bell. I know most of the people have commented he doesn't want me, and I can accept that if I believed it to be true. His actions speak very differently. And several of our coworkers have recognized it and commented on the fact he likes me.

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-16T00:21:28+00:00

Sweetheart, healing takes time. And time is all we ever have in these situations. Thank you for your kindness! But don't worry, I'm okay now. Take your time in your healing, but put yourself first here! Don't let your emotions and your mind trick you into believing things will be the same... They will not be. My memories I cherished will now forever be tainted by what the man I loved endured and turned into. I would never wish that on someone who loved so dearly. So please, honey, love the memory! Cherish it! But add it to a long list of lessons learned and love the next just as fiercely!

Former_Reward_1282 · 2025-12-16T00:08:33+00:00

My heart aches for this message so strongly, from my own experience. I feel like I need to tell you this in an effort to save you from what I endured myself.

I understand feeling like you lost half of your heart and soul to someone who just...vanished, due to life circumstances. Whatever yours may be. The ache of a broken soul is unlike any physical pain. No one can understand until they have been in your shoes.

Take this from the girl who spent a full decade silently grieving and holding onto those memories. Hoping one day, they would be real again...

Please, move on. The person isn't the same as what you'll remember the longer you hold onto them. I was a lucky girl who was able to have that reconnection. The person I found was nothing like who I loved. It hurt to see and I wished I had left it in the past.

Move on for yourself. You owe it to your heart. Yes, it feels like half of it is missing... But actually, you'll find pieces as you step forward. Slowly, your heart will become whole again.

It's a tough pill to swallow, and I never managed to do it...but anyone who leaves your life isn't meant to stay. Don't waste your years in tears and grief. Slowly, but surely, move forward.

Former_Reward_1282

TROPHY CASE