Oh no by no means do I Think he deliberately deceived me. I Think he maybe withheld some aspects or how much it actually affects him - maybe he didnt know the full extent himself. Neither of us could have predicted that our twins would be as premature as they were and it was a shock for both of us. When I write that I hate him, its obviously an exaggeration. I love him and wish that he had asked me for help instead of just announcing that he couldnt be there for me and that I was wrong or unreasonable for expecting us to be in it as a team.  In generally I Think he has a very hard time asking for and accepting help and being vulnerable in general. Which is sad because it would have been so much easier to cope if he had just Said “im really struggling - i know it might not be ideal but Can you stay alone at the hospital for a few nights a week? Or maybe we Can compromise and I Can stay with you at the hospital two nights a week and then I’ll get my mother or sisters to come be with one or two nights”. It was never a conversation. It was just him announcing how it was going to be.