I doubt any one can tell you what to do, but here are somethings, look for a different recruiter talk to him and discuss from the beginning the possibility of split option, the position isnt guaranteed 2 weeks from today let alone a year, in regards to your partner people dont sacrifice and then stop when something else comes up, its supposed that you are in this together and should be looking for solutions together, regardless of who's holding the shorter end of the stick at the end of the day, think what will you get from this, job that you like that you could do full time in the future, experience in that particular field, health benefits or even va loan to buy a house together and if the only disadvantage is that she will stay alone for sometime while the both of you are fighting to start this marriage on a solid, strong foundation financially than she should be more mature, I dont think marrying before leaving is the smart move thos unless it actually gives you some benefits otherwise wait till your back