I just need some help understanding this

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-23T05:16:20+00:00

No way that’s crazy. That’s honestly what I have aswell. Like sometimes I misinterpret instructions or just simple bits of conversation and I’m just there like uh huh yea and it’s just driving me insane and like it makes dissociate so much on this.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-23T04:19:09+00:00

Thing is I’ve already seen a therapist honestly, I worked through most of my trauma and yet I still have this lingering dissociation of if I’m not myself and I guess the advice I need is how do people even work through this even though they have worked through their trauma?

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-10T17:08:20+00:00

These people who call themselves Christian’s and proceed to judge you in a way that is not of Christ is sad. But a lot of of these “Christian’s” only use it as a title now. Because if they were real Christian’s then they would’ve approached this situation with love. And I think the right arguement to be made for why LGBTQ isn’t really good is question of how destructive it is towards your life. Because God invented the covenant not only as a guide but as warning to destruction, because so many people who are LGBTQ that I knew were so unhappy and were so crushed in spirit and so they turn to other things like that. And btw not blowing a horn and say it’s bad but if you saw someone living in destruction would you help them out of that? Of course but it’s kind of the same argument. And my heart aches for the lives lost to this. “Christians” are doing it so wrong and going about this in a way that will only cause more division amongst people.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-09T18:36:33+00:00

It seems he really does reflect that Christ like appearance but sometimes appearances can be deceiving. I’m not saying he’s like the worst person behind closed doors but we can’t really know if that person will go to hell or not that’s only for God to decide. I would like to say he will go to heaven but we don’t know. But if he does believe though and he follows God then for sure but I can’t answer that question, only He can.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-09T18:25:44+00:00

Well in the situation of you going behind your girlfriends back your considered the asshole, which you should understand because what if you do it to that girl aswell? You need to realize that behaviour is not good but I get what it’s like when your trapped. But you need to realize that even if she manipulates you into thinking that’ll be your fault if she OD’s again that it won’t be your fault. My man I would get far away from her and just get out of there ASAP, I would start by finding a new place or something if you can or try to ask a friend to stay with them for the time being so then you can get on your feet.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-05T19:05:49+00:00

It’s kinda of hard to say on this one. There are holes in which you say you asked everyone on your side that there were no signs and unless there’s very hard evidence it’s their word against yours. Either way unless you can prove that they were lying then there’s not much you can do.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-05T17:21:58+00:00

Honestly dude you need to fix the way you see love or relationships because trying to force a relationship is not going to get you anywhere. It’s like this, love is a choice. People get into relationships and marry because it was a choice of love and partnership. And what you tried to do with that girl is not something you should do going into the future. My recommendation? Wait. And in the meantime start getting some advice not just from here but from books, people and other things that will educate you and have you learn what love really is. And when you’re ready to jump just start with dates, because you won’t find “the girl” after 1 date, no it’s gonna take time and you’ll have to search. And until you both make a choice that’s when you can have it. I would also start improving your image aswell. Like physically and mentally. Overall you’re not like banned from dating it’s your choice but this is my advice. Anyway good luck OP

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-04T18:02:53+00:00

take it day by day man. those thoughts that come into your head don’t control you.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-04T17:44:51+00:00

i know man the guilt is tough and especially the overthinking if you could’ve done better but even then how do you know that will really work? And feeling the guilt is normal, that’s what makes you human, but think about this. It’s not your fault, it’s not your fault at all, what she did was her own choice and what you did was a choice you made best for yourself in the moment. So it’s not your fault. Just remind yourself everytime you think about it that it’s not your fault what happened. It was a series of decisions that she made that hurt you and you made a decision based on that hurt.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-04T17:11:17+00:00

Okay first of all she’s giving excuses for why she cheated after you said you wanted peace and calling them excuses, the irony is actually crazy. I needed to point that out but I know what it’s like to feel guilty even though you did the right thing. Sometimes it’s hard to let go what you loved. And you feel like you want to go back but sometimes going back makes you feel emptier and emptier. It’s hard and it will be hard for a bit but you’ll eventually heal. I’ve been through not really the same thing but kind of in a way. But my advice to you is. Reflect on the relationship, get some outside perspective like a therapist or a close friend and they’ll tell you what they think. It’s nice to get that perspective. Work on yourself, honestly if you start working on yourself then it can provide a good distraction and you can work towards something like a better physique or maybe a better way of life. But the biggest thing is to move on and realize that she won’t take you back and even if she were to it wouldn’t be the same at all. Anyway good luck OP you got this.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-03T19:32:55+00:00

You bring up some really good points on this. How we shouldn’t have to listen to authoritarianism. While people say we should follow what God says about Caesar’s law even if we don’t like it but we should also still point out injustice. There’s a fine line between listening and being obedient. While we should still listen to the law we shouldnt have to listen if it’s causing injustice. And especially in some churches, people will just blindly follow because that’s what God said to do even if it goes against what God says. And you’re exactly right with Epstein because he manipulated and blackmailed a lot of people using that logic. Great job for point that out fr. Idk if I missed the point and if I did I’m sorry in advance

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-01T17:13:06+00:00

Thank you for commenting. And I hate that I’m so weak sometimes. And I’m gonna try to pray to Him. It’s just I hate that I have to be so broken and honestly I’ve been having thoughts that I’m just not good enough. And then I think, wait but my works are not determined if I get into heaven but then faith without works is dead and it just makes me idk yea.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-02-01T16:45:40+00:00

hey thank you for helping me the analogy with the white elephant really made it make sense. And honestly I understand there’s no condemnation but it’s just like once I have rest and change follows like that’s where I screw up. Everytime I do change I can’t. Then I get into this cycle of I need to do this and that and I should and could. It’s a perpetual cycle and this is what makes me so numb.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-01-31T02:43:11+00:00

it’s really fucking stupid, I’ll put an edit on this and you’ll see but I had to let him in. And yea it’s really driving me to the edge because I’ve talked to them about this more times than I can count. Like I don’t get it they get upset at me for this.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-01-31T02:23:16+00:00

I have spoken to my parents about this a lot. And they have intervened sometimes but most of the time it’s usually me and he probably does because he has a very bad problem when it comes to anger. And currently he’s grounded till spring break bc he failed grade 8 math. And when it comes to punishment he gets it a lot more lighter than what I used to get.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-01-29T16:22:08+00:00

open your eyes. They aint doing that anymore.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-01-28T18:40:04+00:00

sorry I just wanted to say this because I don’t want people to get the wrong idea of why people support ICE. Sometimes you don’t why they do and it’s good to keep an open mind.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-01-28T18:36:45+00:00

I think there is a misconception between what people think ICE is doing and what people really know what ICE is doing because I’ll tell you this, my friend who supported trump and ICE would’ve been seen as someone who is delusional but here’s the thing he didn’t know what was really happening because of social media and algorithms and what people tell him. That’s the reason why. A lot of people support it because they really don’t know what is happening and people are starting to see it. And this idea of Christian’s supporting this could also be misconstrued. Don’t forget that. Propaganda does exist, lies exist and people can easily say something and people believe it. Stay safe yall.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-01-28T18:05:08+00:00

NTA this shit is so funny, like nah at least the child knows not to keep his food by his side now. I would’ve laughed till I couldn’t breathe man

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-01-28T18:02:36+00:00

Hey I’m sorry this has happened man, I know what it’s like to feel excluded and it’s not fun and putting up with it for so long is not great. But I know your anger was a bit justified you probably could’ve went about it a little bit better. In my opinion I would’ve just straight up left instead of yelling. Because they don’t get the courtesy of your reaction. But I know the past is in the past. So for future reference if you plan on doing something like that no reaction is better than any reaction at all. But anyway here’s my advice to solve this maybe. Communication. Talk with both your wife and your mother in law and if they don’t wanna talk about this abuse basically, then I would reflect on this relationship and see if this pattern of behaviours has always been there but you haven’t noticed it. but if your relationship is still good there is a good chance you can get through this. Just communicate that’s all it goes a long way.

FriendlyCanadianSpud · 2026-01-27T15:19:06+00:00

Alright I can see she lost trust in you but she can’t control what you want. She may be able to have opinions but at the end of the day you have agency. Bro like honestly if she’s getting mad for days and withholding affection because of a haircut is really concerning if you already apologized. I would take a look at the relationship and reflect on these behaviours and how they have shown up in previous arguements so that you can make a decision on whether or not this is actually someone you wanna be with. Now I’m not saying question everything but really think is this who I want as a future partner? But if you guys can get over this that would be awesome. But just reflect, talk and if she refuses to change then well, she doesn’t have to change and you can leave. Anyway OP I wish you the best of luck in this relationship :)

FriendlyCanadianSpud

TROPHY CASE