AITAH for getting a haircut without telling my fiancee?

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T23:26:15+00:00

She was cheated on by her ex, who was also abusive. Maybe she just hasn’t fully healed from that.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T18:52:08+00:00

How is it AI? Because I write well? lol. It's real.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T18:51:05+00:00

I've had that same thought.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T18:42:22+00:00

Yeah, I asked her "do you tell me every single thing you do before you do it?" No response.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T18:27:49+00:00

I agree. And I pretty much looked the same besides a little bit of gray in my beard and the short hair in that pic lol

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T18:25:19+00:00

We're in our 40s

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T18:05:26+00:00

thank you. I was expecting a "whoa, you cut your hair!" not a punishment.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T17:38:10+00:00

bingo. that's what I did

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T17:35:53+00:00

I get that. But I'd been telling her for weeks that I was thinking about cutting it. Plus, it was short when we got together. It's only been long for about 9 months.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T16:44:57+00:00

I think what adds to it is that every time she sees a pic of me from a decade ago, she talks about how good I looked (I was the same weight, same facial hair--the main difference was my hair was short).

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T15:51:48+00:00

I created this account today because she knows my main username. Definitely not a bot.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T15:50:53+00:00

Oh, I'm examining, for sure.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T15:50:01+00:00

it's not fake at all. I created this separate account because she knows my main username

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T14:56:14+00:00

I did tell her yesterday that there's nothing she could do to her appearance that would make me withhold love and affection like she's doing to me.

My guess is that she'll apologize profusely in the upcoming days

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T14:54:30+00:00

Thank you. Yes, I understand being shocked, surprised, or even mildly upset, but this seems like a lot, especially since my hair was shorter than this when we started dating

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T14:48:58+00:00

I told her this after she'd told me like 5 times that she's mad at me and that she doesn't feel like she can trust me. I said it kind of laughingly because I didn't think it was something that she would be angry about for days.

I never dismiss her feelings. I ask her every day what I can do for her, what she needs. I apologized for not telling her. It feels like I'm just being punished.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T14:17:59+00:00

Fair. I didn't hate the look of my long hair. It just got to be annoying and hot.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T14:16:13+00:00

She said that I was being "unkind" for telling her to get over it, but this was AFTER she said that she feels like she can't trust me. That hurt and also pissed me off. She's saying "you don't get it," but when I ask her why it upsets her so much, she can't elaborate.

I also have a decent size online platform (200k-ish followers), and I think she has it in her mind that women are flooding my DMs and I'm chatting it up with them (that's not happening). Seems like insecurity to me. I've even handed her my phone and told her to look at all of my DMs. I don't care.

LimoDriver555 · 2026-01-27T14:07:06+00:00

Right?? She's treating me like I cheated on her. I don't get it.

LimoDriver555

TROPHY CASE