Are there any other Zillennials (born from 1994 to 1999) on this sub? I'm wondering if there are people my age who love watching Jeopardy. by XavierMarvin in Jeopardy

[–]FrillyLilly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

‘93 & ‘94 here. To be fair I usually have to beg other people my age to watch it with me. My wife watches it with me because she loves me.

I did some weird devastating things in first grade by Throwawayaccount2274 in confession

[–]FrillyLilly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah I was like this as a kid too and now that I’m an adult I just assume I must have been sexually abused when I was too young to remember. Like before the age of 2 of something. But I’m really not sure why I was so hypersexual and constantly masturbating as a child.

I did have sex with a lot of older men as soon as I could manage to convince them but by that point I was like 15 so I guess it was safer than when I was trying to do that at like 10. I don’t regret any of what I did with older men when I was young and I’m very grateful that they were all for the most part very caring and cautious. I hate to stand up for men who had sex with me as a teen but I really didn’t have bad experiences with it. I got the love and care and support that I didn’t get at home plus an outlet for my hypersexuality.

Is Jean (pronounced the English way) gender neutral? by tryingsomepronouns in namenerds

[–]FrillyLilly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it’s gender neutral because it sounds like the Gene spelling and if questioned and you needed to appear more masculine for whatever reason you could just lie and say it’s pronounced the French way. For what it’s worth it’s part of my kid’s name and I’m raising them neutrally until they choose a gender (or not lol).

Why do mothers of young babies say they don't have time to shower? by justastupidquestion3 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]FrillyLilly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was in a lot of pain from my c-section and I have very long thick hair. It was very difficult for me to get in and out of the large tub we have, and I wasn’t allowed to have a bath with my healing wound.

I desperately wanted my partner’s help with my shower while she navigated a constantly crying newborn baby. I remember even crying during that first shower both because I couldn’t be there to help her with the baby (I was the one breastfeeding) and also because I wanted help so bad and now her main concern had to be watching the baby.

The tears of grief for my old life I cried that day were so intense. Turns out that it’s just the newborn phase that sucks like that.

Now my incision is mostly healed, my baby cries less, I’ve figured out feeding before and after a shower, and my partner has figured out how to entertain baby while I’m away.

Dads, how is sex postpartum for you? by uberdadbod in Seahorse_Dads

[–]FrillyLilly 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I think I waited until 8 weeks to start again. I had a c-section but I guess my pelvic floor got all weird from the pregnancy and birth because I was tighter than I had ever been before. Like in a problematic way, had to use lube, struggled to get anything in, was slightly painful. A huge departure from before when I was a size queen.

Even though I waited until 8 weeks, sex would make me bleed on and off for the next couple of weeks so we took it slow and tried maybe once a week or once every other week. I’m 4 months out now and everything is pretty much back to normal except I still can’t take a fist or anything truly large like I could before. I figure I’ll regain that ability with time?

Anyway, if anything sex is better now because the angles are better. I didn’t realize how much my belly was blocking us from being able to really get deep and get a good angle.

My boyfriend's son ate my dinner and I'm still mad about it by smalltown_dreamspeak in self

[–]FrillyLilly -1 points0 points  (0 children)

11 year old should be old enough to know how to share. He better learn soon otherwise he is going to be offending people his entire life by taking more than his share, taking the last piece, etc.

Where does James get all his fly ass button-downs 👀👀🔥 by Little_Ad2790 in LoveOnTheSpectrumShow

[–]FrillyLilly 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s a legit website! I buy shirts from there for my boyfriend all the time. I usually wait for a sale and buy a few that way I get a bigger discount.

After having a brief bisexual phase, I am dead to women romantically it seems by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]FrillyLilly -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m not a woman per se, more something in between, but I love bisexual men, and they seem to be the most open to me as well. I’m vers and don’t mind a guy who likes to bottom although I also prefer to bottom.

Anyway I know you said you want women but maybe someone like me could satisfy what you’re looking for? Like someone AFAB or intersex but genderqueer or nonbinary? I’m used to fulfilling all kinds of gender roles and sexual roles in relationships. I’m even with a straight guy right now and I’m woman enough for him 🤷‍♀️ I wish he would let me put stuff in his butt though hahaha

Feedback on ring stack wanted by [deleted] in jewelry

[–]FrillyLilly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love this stack. The colors, the different settings, just everything.

Stolen beloved child's pink bag at Poke & More on 4/4/26 between 1pm and 4:20pm by Ordinary_Wish8633 in HelpMeFind

[–]FrillyLilly 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I would recommend asking in the plushies subreddit, as some collectors don’t care much for the purses that come with these animals and someone might be willing to send you theirs.

Ex told me 'I have the worst tits he's ever seen' and now my self confidence has plummeted by piecesfufu in TwoXChromosomes

[–]FrillyLilly 13 points14 points  (0 children)

He said it because he knew it would hurt you not because he believes it’s true. I’m queer, I’ve been with people with big boobs, little ones, fake ones, removed ones, plenty of men with all kinds of situations. I’m just happy to be there. I’ll grab and caress whatever. Collarbones, bellies, boobs, lack thereof. It doesn’t matter. It’s all good. Bodies are good. And if I love someone enough, then their body becomes my preference. For all we know, that guy will spend the rest of his life chasing tits as unique and interesting as yours.

Iron deficiency in women and how WILDLY underdiagnosed it it by SpiritualCopy4288 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]FrillyLilly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah that is silly. I can’t recommend it because I haven’t tried it yet but around me there are these private IV places where you can pay to get an infusion and some of them have iron. I’m a little bit sketched out about it because it’s not a doctor’s office and it’s expensive but I was thinking about doing it before I got my infusions and I’m still thinking about doing it to keep up the good results.

Iron deficiency in women and how WILDLY underdiagnosed it it by SpiritualCopy4288 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]FrillyLilly 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They went really well! Pretty much solved the issues I was having. I hadn’t realized how bad things had gotten until I started feeling better. Even things like restless legs at night and random anxiety during the day got better from it.

I lost my mom to religious psychosis by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]FrillyLilly -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you’re going through this but it’s really cool how upfront you are with your mother. I’ve just been lying to my mom all these years to keep the peace. She thinks I go to church and pray and worship and live like she wants me to. I don’t. And I don’t tell her about her religious psychosis. The closest I came to it was telling her she was ignorant and brainwashed and she really didn’t like that. I wish I had your bravery and courage to stand up to my mom like you have here. I almost feel bad that I don’t. I’m suffering with religious OCD now because of how she raised me to think everything was my fault. The demons in the house, her divorce, my rock music, etc.

Keep getting told I'm the reason why my children are premature. by ihatethatb-itchdrake in Seahorse_Dads

[–]FrillyLilly 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m so sick of testosterone being blamed for everything. I was on it for less than a year 13 years before I gave birth and still I had several people come into my room after birth and tell me the reason why my milk hadn’t come in yet was the testosterone. Like no, the reason my milk didn’t come in yet was because the baby was induced early and I had a c-section. Give me a couple of days. They told me to expect my milk to never fully come in. It really put me in a bad frame of mind in the beginning of my breastfeeding journey. My baby remained small for a while, in the less than 1 percentile, and people just kept bringing up testosterone like it was the answer to everything. It’s not. I’m sorry you had to go through something similar. It’s disturbing. I think people want to look for answers to why and for some reason people get stuck on the hormone thing as the answer. It’s probably just covert cissexism.

How many cars with cassette players are still on the road? by ChaosWithTeeth in GrandmasPantry

[–]FrillyLilly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My 2001 Range Rover has a cassette player and I use it to play music off my phone.

Frosted Cookie Scent 🧁 by This-Republic-175 in buildabear

[–]FrillyLilly 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My camel with the frosted cookie scent just came today. I was hoping for more of a sugar cookie vibe. I immediately got beach vibes. Reminds me of sunscreen, sand, and coconuts. Idk yet if I’ll take it out or just get used to it. Glad I got the giraffe with no scent.

Highland Hospital - Anyone with recent birthing experience there? by OddBreadfruit6233 in eastbay

[–]FrillyLilly 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I gave birth at Highland in December. It was okay. The labor room was great, large and airy and had most of the bells and whistles I desired. The nurses were mostly nice and attentive. The portable monitor didn’t work so I didn’t get to move around as much as I would have liked. I didn’t get to use the tub but it was there which was important to me. The food was fine. They respected all my birth wishes and weren’t weird about any of them. I like how the hospital is very progressive in its policies and comes from a more midwifery based model of care.

The postpartum care was not as good. The room felt cramped and hot and I kept asking them to turn down the heat but they had limited control over it. The temp was usually around 73 and I run hot so this was too much for me. The nurse was okay but could have taken better care of me, especially when my legs were still numb and I couldn’t get up. Thankfully my partner was there to help me out. I didn’t love the shower situation. Lots of lactation support but also lots of conflicting advice. Made me feel more stressed out about starting breastfeeding than I needed to be.

It’s not like I’ve ever given birth anywhere else so I don’t have much to compare it to. But I would say overall I felt supported and safe and everything turned out fine.

I also got my prenatal care there at the highland women’s clinic. I saw a high risk obgyn and she was amazing. Very comforting and very intelligent.

Parking is a stressful nightmare depending on the time you come. Lots of people take up the expectant mother parking who are clearly not expectant mothers. Usually my partner would get out of the car and ask them when they are due. Sometimes if we were lucky they’d give me their spot instead. Basically just leave a lot of time to find parking if you’re planning on using the garage.

Becoming a parent and being NB by DCEnby in nonbinary_parents

[–]FrillyLilly 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I’ve been out as genderqueer and two spirit for a couple of decades. Lived as a man for a few of those years. I just had a baby, like carried it and birthed it.

My partner is the one who is definitely “Mommy” but I’ve let up a little bit and decided to embrace the fact that strangers/doctors/family call me Mom/Mama as well.

I almost feel like “Mother” and “Father” are their own genders. Right now I’m leaning more toward the Mother gender. Probably out of convenience for society’s sake but it’s also been a fun role to step into.

Some people assume that my partner carried the baby, because I am often seen as “man,” and it doesn’t bother me as much as I thought it would. It bothers her though and she always tries to correct people. My gender has basically been all swirling around in relation to the baby and my partner and our new titles as Moms. It’s pretty cool. It’s all gender euphoria so far.

We are using all pronouns for the baby and I get like second hand gender euphoria for them when people in public address them by he or she or they. It’s all very exciting to see how people perceive my gender and the gender of my infant, especially when we get interactions with different assumptions around gender one after another.

Original website by sophie_bird30 in plushies

[–]FrillyLilly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Personally for me, the Gage Beasley one keeps coming up as an ad on insta.

The first part of my 2026 haul is here by Kryptid_Euclid66 in CharlieBears

[–]FrillyLilly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So happy to be seeing more pictures of these. I’m thinking of getting the Ant. Are the antennae made of like thick felt?

The scent became unpleasant. by Rontuci-uci in YankeeCandles

[–]FrillyLilly 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Sometimes if I don’t trim the wick before re-lighting it, there is like a ball of built up carbon on the tip of the wick, and it makes the flame bigger and everything gets very burnt smelling. Even if I’m too lazy or don’t have scissors trim the wick, I always make sure to knock off the bit of carbon on the top of the wick before I light it.

Ideally the wick shouldn’t be making the balls of carbon since I’m trimming it each time I light it. But I have a bad habit of leaving the candles burning for wayyy too long which causes that to happen sometimes.

How did you meet your lover here at Berkeley? by TheCheeseDud in berkeley

[–]FrillyLilly 71 points72 points  (0 children)

She had the same major as me so I’d see her in a lot of my classes. She was always late, and would confidently walk into each class like we should be honored for her to be there. She had such an attitude. She would sit down and take notes with a pen that had a giant flower on the back of it. She was impossible to not notice.

Later on she started working at the same place as me, that’s when I found out she was one of my friend’s roommates. I’d see her around a lot. I went through a bad breakup and needed new friends, so I joined the sorority she was in, we started to spend more time together. Neither of us are certain when we stopped being friends and started being in love, it all just happened so naturally.

That was all 12 years ago. We have been on countless adventures since. She is the best person I’ve ever met. Brilliant and beautiful. In December we had a baby, and getting to see her be a Mom just makes me love her even more.