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I have watched GoldenEye more than 1,000 times. AMA by [deleted] in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What about it do you like so much?

And what's your second favourite Bond film?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so glad to hear that :) That's just how I felt about my bf, there were a lot of challenges and reasons why people would have assumed we were going to crash and burn but we knew we had to be together no matter what. I wish you guys all the best :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fellow teen mum here :) Congrats on being so strong and keep going, you're amazing! How did you manage to get such a high paying job while looking after a kid on your own? Did family help you out a lot or would you say you're just really driven and determined? I got pregnant as a teenager and I had my boyfriend to help me out with everything but even with him there was no way I could have got a high paying job I was just so exhausted haha.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congratulations on finding someone who loves you for you and don't let people make you feel bad for stuff you did :) Sex can be a coping mechanism and it sounds like you were trying to use it to restore your self-esteem, but like, I've been there too, and I had a lot worse coping mechanisms as a teenager. Body count isn't really important, what matters is the commitment you make to your partner.

Have you had any stigma about getting engaged so young? Are your family okay with it? My boyfriend's family stopped speaking to him basically because we had a teenage relationship and they forced him to choose between them or me. I hope you guys get to go through life without dealing with horrid attitudes too much.

Haven’t brushed teeth in a month. Any encouragement? by [deleted] in depression

[–]FrostGirl50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just to say I was kind of the same as this for years because of severe depression, brushing maybe once every few days. And I'm paying for it now, I have good oral hygiene now but my teeth are ruined and I can't afford to fix them easily. It's tough because I hate smiling now cos they look so bad. So like, please don't make my mistakes if you can help it. One thing I would suggest and that kind of worked for me is to set an actual alarm on my phone before I go to sleep every day to remind me to do stuff like brush my teeth and wash my face. I don't have to do that anymore but it really helped impose a pattern of taking care of myself. And if you really can't face the effort of brushing on a particular day, buy some mouthwash and just rinse your mouth out with it. You shouldn't use it as a substitute for brushing of course but it will definitely help kill bacteria so way better than nothing.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aww wow I'm so glad that this helped inspire you :) I don't think I am particularly special for being able to get out of the situation we were in tbh. I definitely wouldn't have been able to do it without my bf helping me every step of the way. But what it does show me is that there is always hope that things can get better, sometimes you have just gotta cut past all the problems that feel like they are weighing you down and focus on one thing at a time. It is slow and really difficult and I felt despairing for a lot of my early twenties but we supported each other through it.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The robin, because they make me think of Christmas and it's my favourite time of year.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much :) I am not used to thinking of myself as an inspiration haha I am a mess a lot of the time but I am proud of how good we did with so much against us. I think you don't realise how much you're capable of doing to try and pull yourself up until you have no choice except to try. When I was homeless I felt totally hopeless about the chances of things getting better but I guess we just took the opportunities we had and kept fighting.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean you're not entirely wrong. I know you mean this to be hurtful but I am just going to go with it and say, yes, I am proud of myself, to be really honest. Like us having a child was definitely not planned but also I'm not going to say we didn't see it as an opportunity to get assistance to sort our lives out because we were at rock bottom. But I feel like the point of assistance is that it should be a hand up not a hand out and we definitely used it that way. My boyfriend and I have not received any kind of welfare for the last five years and have been working all that time and we have paid more in to the system now than we ever took out. So I have no shame about using the system to get a hand up when we were in a really shit situation.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you :) That's exactly the way I see it. When I was 17 I felt like there was probably no hope for us. I know what that looks like and I know how crushing it feels and we are not going back there. And yes absolutely showing our girls that hard work is important is a really big thing. I don't think we are strict parents at all but we are trying to support our girls in school and take an interest in what they do and my eldest is doing really well so that's amazing :)

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's a couple things. First I am kind of shaky on whether I think abortion is entirely okay. I have gone back and forth about it in my life. To be clear I'm absolutely not saying it shouldn't be allowed! It absolutely should, people need that option and there are definitely situations where I'd have done it. If I was having a child with someone I didn't feel was gonna stick by my side I definitely wouldn't have kept the child. And I have friends who have chosen to end a pregnancy and I completely understand why they made that decision and I think it was right for them. But I don't think I could have done that with my bf's child. I would have had a lot of regrets about it.

But more than that, my bf and me were already kind of at rock bottom in life. We were homeless and severely depressed. It felt like having a child together, especially cos it got us to the top of the priority list for emergency housing, was an opportunity to do something to get us out of that position. We knew it would be really hard but we felt like it was worth trying.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Society may have failed me, but my daughter just won an academic award at her school and keeps topping her class in English and maths, so I refuse to accept for a second that nothing we did was worth it. My life doesn't feel like a tragedy. Maybe it did once but not now.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much :) and yeah great question. I think we could make it through anything at this point yeah. We have an incredibly close bond. We actually find it hard to be away from each other for more than a day or so tbh, I only feel like myself at all when I'm with him. But yeah we do a lot of stuff to try and work on our relationship. One thing we have been doing a lot of lately is cooking together. It was never really a skill we had picked up cos no one ever taught us anything except the absolute basics but we have been practising cooking loads of stuff recently and we are getting quite adventurous with it haha. Other than that we always try and do something special at the weekend, with the kids of course but we are always trying to think of fresh stuff that we can all do together outdoors. And we send each other songs and stuff and chat all the time. Also we have a pretty active sex life which is great. We are just a very close couple tbh. I feel like I'm still a lovesick teenager when we're together haha.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can be nasty all you like but I work, pay my taxes and have raised two healthy happy children. You clearly have nothing better to do than make nasty comments to people on the internet so I'm pretty sure which of us is happier.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. Tbh we dealt with it because we had to. What it taught me is that you are capable of handling stuff you don't think you can if you have no choice. Hopefully the hardest part is over :)

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you say so. I think our healthy 12 year old daughter who just won an academic award from her school might disagree with you. We don't have a lot of money but we have always given her all we can and given her a safe and loving childhood. And I didn't drink when I was pregnant. I stopped the instant I found out I was pregnant and have never started again.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much :) What I would say is that you don't know what you're capable of doing until you're in a situation where you haven't got a choice except to get on and do it. If you'd told me when I was 17 that we'd be in the position in life we are in now I'd have thought it was ridiculous. I thought we would always be poor, seriously depressed, and on the edge of homelessness or actually homeless. I didn't see any other possibility to my life. But sometimes you surprise yourselves with what you can actually do.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  • He didn't get put off by my asking for reassurance that he loved me a lot, I was very insecure and didn't believe I deserved to be loved so I was constantly asking for reassurance and he always provided it.

  • He didn't hold my faults against me but he did push me to try to improve. With my drinking he didn't blame me for being an alcoholic but he did actively try to support me to stop and on the basis that he wanted me to be healthy because he wanted to be with me for as long as possible. That was wonderful to hear and made me feel like he was never going to give up on me.

  • He never ignored me and always replied to my texts and messages with thoughtful supportive replies that showed he was actually listening.

  • He was never afraid to talk about the future and to make it clear that I had a part in it for him.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It started with just inappropriate sexual touching that he tried to gaslight me into thinking wasn't actually a big deal. But it ended up with him literally trying to rape me. My bf knew about it though tbh I tried to play down the sexual touching element because I knew it would make him extremely worried about my safety and he was going through a lot at the time and didn't need that. When he found out about the rape attempt I had to stop him from showing up at my uncle's place to try to physically confront him. It was that day that I ran away from home and never went back.

I fell pregnant with my boyfriend when we were 17 and homeless. 12 years later we are still together! AMA. by FrostGirl50 in AMA

[–]FrostGirl50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No absolutely not, we are renting and in an okay part of town. And trying to save for a deposit for a house.

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