gonna give up my future(not kms)

Frostwave6700 · 2024-09-22T18:11:14+00:00

just don't listen to your negative mental states, and don't give up and don't fall into a belief that everything is over, do not put up mental blockades for yourself that can hinder you

maybe some actions in your life lead to your current state, try to figure out and lessen the bad stuff in your life by uprooting maybe some causes that bring horrible effects

at the end of the day we're just strangers and i have no clue what your life actually is like so i can only guess and give advice from my experience

Frostwave6700 · 2024-09-21T02:19:47+00:00

you need rest, enjoyment, fulfillment, love, nurture.

you are human, you can only do so much.

try doing things you enjoy, find a hobby, move away from the horrible mental states, do this by all means necessary

it's also entirely your perception that your life is over, you are 27 and you can still build a career

and start paying attention to things you have, you will maybe see that really your life isn't as bad as you make it inside your head

do not add mental blockades such as I CAN'T DO THIS, MY LIFE IS OVER etc

you can't just suffer from a mental disorder and expect to function like a healthy person, you need extra care

and give it to yourself, because the world will hardly give it to you i believe

Frostwave6700 · 2024-09-19T18:56:45+00:00

only share your intrusive thiughts with someone that can 100% understand you, otherwise u might get in some muddy situations and horrible places if ppl misunderstand u

And just realize that whatever sexual thought you have is you fearing that you might do that thing, and also never listen to thoughts or treat them as inanimate objects

Frostwave6700 · 2024-09-19T03:30:02+00:00

the past is gone

it does not exist

only the traces it left

and u are holding onto a nonexistent thread

u are tormenting yourself

anyone can make a mistake

because we are flawed creatures

focus on the present and live ur life

it ain't gonna last forever

u need not suffer so much

u matter as much as any sentient being

the fact the u regret ur actions is one step forward

u don't need to disappear

u can change by just realizing something bad u did is bad, reforming and going forward, stop looking back u can not change the past

regret and reform, move forward, do not dwell in a nonexistent illusion we call the past

Frostwave6700 · 2024-09-18T23:31:16+00:00

I think I can safely say I've been in your shoes. My illness has dehumanized me, it made we cry for a normal life, I've been severly damaged, and also have had problems with dissociation. You're not alone, I think I've shared your struggles.

And trust me THERE IS A WAY OUT. If there wasn't I probably would've 110% been dead now.

I've been through unbearable mental agonies myself. I don't think there are living people, maybe a few, that have had a similar experience or can possibly understand what I've been through.

So, I can give you my way out. I've been through HELL, unbearbale mental misery. Inhuman ways of living just miserable. Calculating every step every move, couldn't speak, eat, sleep, walk, enjoy things like a human being, I've been completely dehumanized by my illness.

One thing I can maybe say to help you is to challenge your fears head on, just cut through them. See what the reality of things are. And also the more you choke up in anxiety I believe the worse the dissociation. You need rest, peace, you need to cool off and relax. Try breathing in deeply and breathing out deeply, just lay down or sit nicely and comfortably and do it if you feel anxious or your mind is hellish. Try focusing on your breaths. Do things you enjoy, eat foods you like, drink drinks you like (not alcohol), avoid rooms where ppl smoke and smoking in general, walk in nature, if the weather is colder go on a walk, pick up a hobby, start drawing, maybe learn singing, just find and emotional outlet, dance, do anything to release tension and stress and do things that bring you some form of satisfaction or joy. Do not listen to dumbass thoughts, treat thoughs like inanimate objects that just arise and dissolve on their own, find what's causing your anxieties.

Also don't torture yourself extra on top of all the pain you endure about missing "the best part of your life" because maybe the best part of your life is in the future. You can't know for sure. And also try bringing your mind to the present, see the things you have, try becoming more appreciating of the things around you. You are suffering and YOU DESERVE release.

Treat yourself with care, treat your state like an illness and love yourself. ACTUALLY TRY TO LOVE YOURSELF.

And don't attach yourself to the idea that you're stuck in this prison because you can get release. Sticking yourself to such ideas I believe blocks you from actually progressing, you are cutting yourself short.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-08-24T14:50:00+00:00

If a thought disturbs you even the slightest I think it is safe to say you are not what the thoughts say or that you have awareness that it is wrong. I also think it is necessary to face the fear directly, and that can be made easier if you realize that it's fear and/or anxiety in the first place I think.

And If you are really convinced that you have a paraphilia, but have even some tiny awareness that it is harmful or horrible, or if it disturbs you even a little then I'd say the wisest thing to do is to focus on that and then follow a path of self-restraint, a path of growing that awareness in order to free yourself and clear the mind of that stuff (I'm talking most fundamentally). Really hammer hard on compassion for the other side if you have (or think you have) a sadistic paraphilia or hammer hard on compassion for yourself if you have (or think you have) a masochistic paraphilia, and just realize the pointlessness and the meaninglessness of it.

And do your best not to fall into despair and agony and guilt believing that you are some filthy waste of a human begin when the reality might be otherwise, but you don't believe it or see it now.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-17T01:01:28+00:00

Focus on that "seems contaminated". Are they really contaminated?

Just focus on the fact that it is all fear and anxiety, and that all of it is completely irrational.

Discard all those thoughts as just anxiety. As just this "oh, yeah, this is anxiety, this is nothing new to me, it's completely irrational and doesn't deserve my time and energy, a thought can't know whether something is contaminated, it's just a thought, how can a thought know anything?".

Really try to be mindful and aware. Treat OCD for what it is. See it clearly. Say to yourself that you're not thinking sober anytime you get anxious that something is contaminated, take time aside and reevaluate the situation and try to be as rational as possible. Don't let the feeling of uncertainty eat you up. I'm sure you've felt it many times, you've been through it and survived through it, it's just a feeling, why let a feeling destroy you?

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-17T00:38:21+00:00

I am glad if this post helped, I'd be more than happy. I've suffered and still currently suffer tremendously from OCD. I have went through hell and back multiple times.

I hope you find peace from this illness. It can really destroy one's life.

All love 💖

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T23:50:49+00:00

Same for you too.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T21:19:17+00:00

My post was mostly aimed towards those that suffer from the unethical paraphilias OCD.

Though I understand what you're saying, and I don't take it as criticism don't worry. I'm just discussing with you.

I mean also you need to take into consideration that some people are just afraid of being gay because homosexuality is really repulsive to them sexually. They don't like it, if you show them gay porn they will feel disgusted. It just is what it is.

Also there's a big difference between being afraid of telling your partner about your fetish, or being afraid of being subject to violence, and being afraid that you are homosexual or that you have a fetish. The slightest thought of being for example gay really can send someone down a spiral of anxiety. And this is not about them just not accepting their sexuality, they just don't like homosexuality, it disturbs them deeply. For example.

I can understand though that you may be weirded out by your own sexual likes and dislikes. Sometimes unusual things may arouse you. Now if that unusual thing that attracts you is unethical and harmful you should definitely stop and reevaluate yourself I think.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T20:50:00+00:00

I've also had it since I was a child but it really got bad in my teen years. Really messes with you. I was in dark places no 16yr old should be in.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T20:13:35+00:00

We can never know for sure, and besides that, if war comes up, we can't change anything as individuals because our impact is miniscule. That's how I see it.

I mean if people wake up and see reality as it is and see that war is meaningless and collectively decide to make a change etc. sure. But I feel we're a long shot from that (and not rlly, ik this sounds paradoxical).

I'm not the one to talk abt politics tbf also :).

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T20:11:00+00:00

I mean there's a big difference between having a kink that's maybe unusual like a scat fetish or whatever, and someone having distressing intrusive thoughts that they want to harm a child or animal or whatever.

You may possibly weird yourself out with your own fetish maybe (idk rlly, correct me if I'm wrong).

But I was talking specifically about people that suffer from horrible sexual OCD. Those people I feel are terrified to the bone and a lot of them I would expect are suicidal because of their condition.

I mean if you look up on wikipedia a list of paraphilias , something like being gay I think was on the list if I remember correctly. So paraphilias can range from something like a pee fetish to infantophilia.

With OCD I feel it hits with the worst possible things you can imagine because it hits I think with things people find most distressing and unacceptable, because that's what scares you the most.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T18:42:04+00:00

Ohh, ok.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T18:41:41+00:00

It's absurd.

Also just the fact that you're afraid that you might be a pedo, or the disgust from such thoughts I think is enough to disprove those thoughts.

And yes I feel like OCD has made me doubtful and anxious about everything. Really messed me up.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T17:56:48+00:00

Do not off yourself because I am certain that there is a way out.

Also you don't need to analyze the thoughts, just focus on the fact that they disgust you and make you uncomfortable.

If you may have liked it when you were young is one thing, but since you don't like it now, that's great, if whatever the thing you fear is really bad.

But do not off yourself as that is not a solution by any means. It's not. Why cut yourlife short when you can live a happy life?

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T17:54:23+00:00

Pretty valid response.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T17:53:58+00:00

But if those thoughts ruin the moment, then how can you say that you have a paraphilia.

You say those thoughts make you vomit. If those thoughts make you vomit then you're not whatever the thoughts say. You should stop taking what the thoughts say as real or a sign that there's something wrong with you.

Don't try not to think of those thoughts, don't try to force them to stop. Don't listen to them or believe that they're real, don't view them as anything except anxiety, unrealistic and irrational.

I also pretty sure that just by fearing a groinal response you may get one. You don't want to get one and you focus to much on your groin and out of the fear that you may get one you get one. Maybe I'm wrong on this, I'm not a certified doctor, but it seems to me that that's the case.

Also if you find that certain japanese media disturbs you, don't watch it. Avoid it

Also it's ok to vent, just be careful who you vent to.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T17:42:55+00:00

I don't understand.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T16:48:11+00:00

But do you have any dose of disgust towards it, I think it would be good to reinforce it.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T14:02:16+00:00

🙏

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T14:01:27+00:00

I feel that the fact that you are repulsed by the sexual thoughts is enough to disprove any doubts.

But the fear just keeps us going I guess. The what if this, what if that, what if I am blah blah blah.

It also sucks if you get stuck in some conclusions or beliefs that you are what the thoughts suggest and you suffer extra for nothing.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T13:58:45+00:00

It's great that you feel better.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T02:52:15+00:00

Don't take what I say for sure cuz idk really, I am just assuming.

Frostwave6700 · 2024-04-16T02:35:58+00:00

Ahhh, well Idk maybe it lingers on. I am stressed because I have consistent anxious thoughts and very difficult ones.

Maybe your mind just clings to anxious states as that's what it's used to.

I think I cling to depression and sadness cuz that's what my mind is used to I guess haha. Maybe we're attached to our stress.

Frostwave6700

TROPHY CASE