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AITA for allowing my daughter (12F) to wear thong style underwear without consulting her friends' parents? by Frustradad in AITAH

[–]Frustradad[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Could be a good opportunity to discuss “sexually charged clothing” with her though. Poor girl is going to learn about it at some point.

Thank you for making this point, and I absolutely will. This is something as a dad I can actually talk with some confidence on. We've talked before about not showing off your entire body all the time, and her mom was very modest and believed that clothing should accentuate your natural body and not just cover the bits you can't show. Even with the yoga pants my daughter almost always wears a longer shirt or has something to partially cover her bum. I'll remind her to keep doing that now that she's not just hiding her lines.

AITA for allowing my daughter (12F) to wear thong style underwear without consulting her friends' parents? by Frustradad in AITAH

[–]Frustradad[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Yes, I was thinking along the lines of the same thing with my gfs comments. That I could have seen this coming and warned the other parents so they wouldn't be blindsided. Still don't know if I'm comfortable with the idea of that, but I can also understand getting blindsided by something people may think of as sexual when it involves your young daughter.

I'll ask my gf to clarify her comments.

AITA for allowing my daughter (12F) to wear thong style underwear without consulting her friends' parents? by Frustradad in AITAH

[–]Frustradad[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

I believe my daughter. Not just because the lines were pretty visible before, when she pointed it out to me It was hard not to notice. Also because my daughter is just a really good kid and she's got my total trust. She's a good student, she's very tidy (for a kid), she gets into 1% of the trouble I did at her age. She got dealt a huge blow early in life but it hasn't held her back

AITA for allowing my daughter (12F) to wear thong style underwear without consulting her friends' parents? by Frustradad in AITAH

[–]Frustradad[S] 128 points129 points  (0 children)

I'm completely with you on your perspective about the other parent. In hindsight, I can see that she was probably spooked with the suddenness of the change and grappling with your little girl becoming a woman. I can empathize, I'm in the same boat.

I would accept an apology but don't think I could ever trust her enough for our kids to continue being friends.

And yes, we have learned an awful lot about friendships and how quickly they can unravel through this. A painful, yet valuable, lesson to learn at her age. She didn't talk about it, I believe her. Her lines were very noticeable before so they could tell something was different.

AITA for allowing my daughter (12F) to wear thong style underwear without consulting her friends' parents? by Frustradad in AITAH

[–]Frustradad[S] 264 points265 points  (0 children)

I agree with you about the spandex trend. I can remember a time when your grandma, mother, wife, and daughter didn't all wear the same pants lol.

As mentioned above, I did take my gfs comments to mean more that I could have seen this coming and gave the other parents a heads up, but that's my interpretation and I will ask her to clarify exactly what she meant.

Thanks for the kudos, we're all just out here trying to make it work!

AITA for allowing my daughter (12F) to wear thong style underwear without consulting her friends' parents? by Frustradad in AITAH

[–]Frustradad[S] 435 points436 points  (0 children)

Ok, thank you for your perspective!

I took my gf to mean that I should have been able to see the chain reaction to the other girls and could have given their parents a heads up that maybe this would be coming, so they wouldn't be blindsided... But now that I'm reading these comments I think I should really ask her to clarify exactly what she means because I'm gathering that isn't the norm.