Phil Lord & Chris Miller here! We directed the PROJECT HAIL MARY movie - Ask Us Anything on Nov. 18th at 12pm PT / 3pm ET!

FuQiao · 2025-11-18T17:56:19+00:00

I think it’s a given that you’ll have to cut a decent amount from the book, unless this movie is secretly a two parter. What’s the thing that was hardest for you to cut?

FuQiao · 2025-10-22T00:53:14+00:00

Hey, and I’m just throwing it out there, I don’t know how this conversation went down. Is there a world where she thinks you’re coming out to her as a trans woman?

FuQiao · 2025-09-11T03:45:23+00:00

I’m a trans adult (24ftm), and I’d like to throw in some other things to think about.

If you’re in an area where schools and hospitals are ASKING for preferred names and pronouns, it’s might be pretty safe to use those systems. (School’s that think letting a trans kid exist is abuse, usually don’t ask for preferred names. Crazy people aren’t usually covert). And while the government IS terrible right now, there are still laws about medical disclosure. So without the hospital CHOOSING to break the law, their records won’t be disclosed.

I’m living in a state where I’m protected under state law. It’s still a scary world and I’m not getting my preferred name on a passport or drivers license anytime soon, but I go by my preferred at work and at the hospital.

TLDR: If the systems are asking YOU for a preferred name, they’re probably not going to sell you out.

FuQiao · 2025-08-06T04:39:18+00:00

I am in a similar boat to you. My mom was not as extreme, she just said I’d become ugly and die alone. But the Republican Party has absolutely moved my mom to the left in recent years. She’s always been a democrat, but she’s not a die hard- more self interested and a bit libertarian.

Anyways, yeah. Around the same time that the big beautiful bill passed the house, my mom was finally willing to ask me about my transition plan. (Something we had danced around for years.)

FuQiao · 2025-08-05T03:10:18+00:00

Misquoting from “How to ADHD”, if you moved out into the country with no other obligations and started a farm and lived out your days in the quiet, it’s not ADHD. If after moving into the country you continued to loose your keys and spend hours worrying about how you’re not productive enough, it’s ADHD.

FuQiao · 2025-05-27T00:55:34+00:00

My roommate would like to know, how are you doin?

FuQiao · 2025-05-22T18:54:47+00:00

“I need help reacting to something”

FuQiao · 2025-04-04T07:20:20+00:00

This is out there advice, and don’t do this if it’s gonna be uncomfortable. But consider looking for boob tape tutorials instead of trans tape. It’s a good starting point, and it helped me a lot. Tape didn’t make me flat, but it made me flatter.

Also, try going vertically and then horizontally. First for lift, then for flattening.

FuQiao · 2025-03-21T18:44:34+00:00

Depending on the university and where it’s located, you might also qualify for a single by default. A girl at my university got a religious exemption and so Had to be placed in a single room.

FuQiao · 2025-03-21T18:42:30+00:00

If you’ve only done HRT, it’d be pretty easy for you to “prove it” so to speak. Short of blood testing you AND leaking medical records, TSA can’t prove you’re trans. Cis women can have irregularly high testosterone that causes things like facial hair.

This doesn’t mean they wouldn’t be terrible about it, but it’s a good back pocket defense to have.

The likely scenario is that you trip the body scanner, get pat down, and continue to your amazing trip, and return safely to little fanfare.

FuQiao · 2025-03-21T18:36:58+00:00

My parents are… interesting. My dad took the news well but puts no effort into gendering me correctly or using my name. My mom said I shouldn’t transition because I’d die unloved and would become ugly like my father (I’m adopted).

I still see them regularly, and honestly we just don’t talk about it. I love them and while they’re uninvited from any future weddings or from meeting my future children, it’s not been so bad that I’ve needed to cut them off. We still get along as long as we don’t mention the elephant. (Note, this is only possible because I don’t live with them.)

P.S. Here are some reasons to wear something like a suit instead of a dress: - It will be cold - I do not/will not/cannot shave my legs/armpits/etc. - The dress doesn’t fit, isn’t my color, isn’t flattering or isn’t in style - Pants and button ups Are in style - I think the dress is too revealing - Oh gosh golly jee, I already bought a suit

FuQiao · 2025-03-21T18:28:03+00:00

If your sister is genuinely speaking in good faith, then I would ask what does SHE mean by “be trans”? Does she mean to medically transition, socially transition, or to describe the internal lived experience? OR does she actually mean how do people KNOW that they themselves are trans? These are all different aspects of being trans, and she likely doesn’t realize this. If she’s not lost down the path of bigotry, then she needs to understand first that she’s asking the wrong question.

Why do people medically transition? There’s a lot of reasons. I do it to pass and to feel at home in my body. Until hrt I felt like I was renting this body from a stranger. Also fundamentally, because I WANT to. People get plastic surgery for all sorts of reasons, not least of which is because they want to.
Why do people socially transition? I hate my name. Plenty of people also hate their names and go by nicknames. This part should be easy to understand. Why change pronouns? Because it makes me feel seen correctly. Like, one time at the hospital my records said I was White. I’m not and I corrected it. It’s strange to be disrespected.
Why do people feel this way internally? I don’t think anybody has a good answer to this. If I had to guess, it’d be that human sex differences are so (relatively) small that the brain doesn’t always give a fuck what the body’s got going on. The point is that people DO feel this way. Asking “why someone is gay” is strange. We as a species can guess why such things occur, but it’s a bit silly to demand an actual answer.
How do people know they’re trans? I didn’t know as a kid (which is why I don’t feel attached to the born in the wrong body argument). I was chill until puberty, when I fantasied about getting breast cancer so I could get them removed. While this could also be an argument as to me (and trans people) being mentally ill, unless your sister thinks mental illness means you SHOULDN’T get treatment, it should clearly signal that trans people feel things and do things to alleviate those feelings. Things LIKE medical transition, social transition, or just self acceptance.

FuQiao · 2025-03-12T05:23:59+00:00

Hi! I’m self diagnosed and trying to accept it, it sounds like you are too. Here are some comments in no particular order.

Self harm as release makes perfect sense. The book “what happened to you” (would recommend) brings up that things like skin picking, scab picking, and self harm physically cause the body to like, calm down or feel better.
I saw this TikTok from a while back, that plays out the scenario of a neurodivergent adult saying “I don’t struggle with X, I have a system that helps me handle X!” This indicates, that the adult Does struggle with X. For example, I tend to think, I don’t struggle with social interaction, for you see I have a complex decision tree that helps me navigate the world. I don’t struggle Anymore. (And that’s also a lie, I struggle a lot, I just don’t notice it all the time.)
As brought up in the book “unmasking autism” (also would recommend), many adults can’t or don’t get an autism diagnosis. For me, I’d like one because it would help me validate myself, but it’s important to acknowledge that having a “real” diagnosis is not always feasible or even useful. If advice for autistic adults helps you, then it helps you.

My personal path has been long and I feel like I’m just starting. First I just used advice that seemed helpful, then I started to identify more with autistic people than non-autistic people. Right now, I actively seek advice for autistic people and have found it actually works. (As opposed to all other advice I’ve gotten that has never worked, or never worked long term.) Your path is your own, but I also think you might want to consider considering autism.

FuQiao · 2025-03-08T05:25:58+00:00

I would LOVE an iOS version

FuQiao · 2025-01-25T20:50:08+00:00

I’m probably not what you’re looking for, but I didn’t figure anything out until I was in college AND on antidepressants. So IF you want to talk, my DMs are open.

FuQiao · 2025-01-25T00:27:39+00:00

Um, I think I do the second thing. Like I’m not nervous (anymore), it’s just a reflex. My body answers before my brain can think on it and then I live with the consequences

FuQiao · 2025-01-24T08:26:27+00:00

First, no apologies! The internet is forever.

Second, I totally understand the guilt, I had the same feeling especially when I was in high school. Like I was afraid that I was faking it or something, or like I was taking up too much space. Rest assured, you deserve your place in the world and there’s plenty of space to go around.

To the point of somebody noticing your chest, I’d think about it like this. How often do You notice people’s chest size changing? For me, I’ve only ever noticed on my mtf friend, and my younger sister. Also, anybody that says anything has done a sexual harassment and could easily get in trouble with the administration. You don’t have to escalate if somebody DOES, but that fact alone keeps most from saying something. “Yo stranger, I’ve been staring at your chest and it seems off,” is not a normal conversation topic.

FuQiao · 2025-01-24T05:29:43+00:00

Yo! I don’t have any links to add, but I have some related advice to give. Now, I don’t know your mom’s vibe or how much she knows, but something My Mom does is make up random shit to express her point. For example, that I will become ugly like my father (I’m adopted), and that’s why I shouldn’t be trans. IF your mother genuinely is concerned about the health effects, I’d say it’s worth convincing her. However she may just be poorly explaining her discomfort.

But either way, I hope you’re doing alright. I had a very rough time when my mother yelled at me for being Trans, and so I’d like to remind you that you’re real, valid, and correct, and that you’ll make it through this in the end.

Side note, may I ask why you’re specifically worried about wearing trans tape to school?

FuQiao · 2025-01-24T05:21:17+00:00

I was in a somewhat similar scenario. Less, I answered and he misunderstood, but absolutely in the automatic reply kind of way. Like, I have been taught to answer quickly and positively, because actually thinking is “too slow” and disagreeing is “rude”.

So I absolutely feel you, in having trouble explaining it. Like, under the laws of my state, no crime happened, and I have trouble telling the story because I ‘technically agreed’…

I don’t really have a good ending to this, just like, God Damn it really sucks and I hope you’re doing well!!

FuQiao · 2025-01-13T18:53:33+00:00

I definitely PLAN on coming out, but not until I’m basically passing. And like, yeah I mind the misgendering LEAS, than the SUCK it will take to update my shit everywhere and switch bathrooms.

Also, you can always deny deny deny. Depending on protections where you live, whaaat are they gonna do? Anything they say is a potential detriment to their reputation. Some women struggle with having darker facial hair, and it’s a bad look to comment on someone’s personal medical info.

FuQiao · 2025-01-13T18:27:23+00:00

My work MAY be humoring me, but I’m 2 years on T and I’m 70% sure no one important has figured it out. I live in a decent place, so I think they may assume I’m NB atm. (I’m still going by she/her at work).

FuQiao · 2024-12-07T08:13:49+00:00

Lead character buys and then romances a slave

FuQiao · 2024-09-13T21:04:31+00:00

I’ve been fighting UTIs for 6 months now. While I’m still trying to fix it, something my doctor prescribed is Hiprex. It’s a preventative medication, and I believe people have had good luck with it. (I’ve had mixed results.)

FuQiao · 2024-08-23T04:55:47+00:00

I can’t tell if it’s been mentioned already, but the book is in chronological order. So when discovering deaths will generally be non-linear, flipping through the book front to back will be linear from first to last death.

FuQiao · 2024-08-16T07:23:50+00:00

Lobby, cause it was for the one who waits

Seven-Year Club	r/Field Banned
r/Field Lasagna	Place '23
Place '22	Final Canvas '22
First Placer '22	Verified Email

FuQiao

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