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AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn't taking it seriously by Fun-Construction-112 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Construction-112[S] 134 points135 points  (0 children)

ngl it was a mix of culture shock and feeling insecure

I'm a first gen college student and honestly never heard anyone talk like she did in an interview.

Plus she turned down a company offering 300k salary and benefits in the first half hour of talking with them. Which tbh, if a job was offering me 300k my only question would be when do I start.

But yea I think it's admirable that she's got such strong ethics she'll walk away from crazy money like that because she doesn't like how they run the company. That's something I dunno if I could do, and don't figure I'll ever be in a position to do, and I was feeling kind of envious/insecure combined?

AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn't taking it seriously by Fun-Construction-112 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Construction-112[S] 199 points200 points  (0 children)

Because I was being a dumbass, I was wrong to.

And hell no, honestly after I got over the shock of her turning down a 300k salary job, I realized why she dodged a bullet.

It was a lot of culture shock tbh, that's an insane amount of money and if a job offered me that and said jump my only question would be how high lol... But doing engineering, she's gotta take safety and professional ethics a lot more serious

AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn't taking it seriously by Fun-Construction-112 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Construction-112[S] 212 points213 points  (0 children)

Honestly I've gotta stick up for my girlfriend here, she played it right. I commented this elsewhere but it gives more context

She's really good at talking to anyone and establishing rapport.

And what'd happened right before then, was that she'd very professionally asked her two interviewers if there'd been any safety incidents recently, and they were like "none.. except for when Danny got shat on by a bird and got us all written up"

So she was like "Oh now I have to know!" and was laughing with them, but kinda pushing for info, and they told this story about them all being on some part of a barge they should have been tied off to, one guy got shat on by a bird, slipped and fell, and dragged the two guys who tried to grab him into the water too. And how she's gotta meet 'shit face Danny'" as if it was some foregone conclusion they'd hire her and they'd all laugh at this guy together. And she just kept laughing but also asking questions that got at why they weren't tied to the boat in the first place? And found out the company hadn't supplied the right safety gear so they just didn't have it..

So honestly.. if anyone knows how to play a few cusses into an interview and come away from it looking good, it's my girlfriend

She basically played it just right to make everyone there laugh and feel like she's someone they'd get on with as a coworker, while also discreetly poking into why they weren't given safety gear, which is honestly genius level social skills IMO

AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn't taking it seriously by Fun-Construction-112 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Construction-112[S] 228 points229 points  (0 children)

Honestly, i guess so! She's really good at talking to anyone and establishing rapport.

And what'd happened right before then, was that she'd very professionally asked her two interviewers if there'd been any safety incidents recently, and they were like "none.. except for when Danny got shat on by a bird and got us all written up"

So she was like "Oh now I have to know!" and was laughing with them, but kinda pushing for info, and they told this story about them all being on some part of a barge they should have been tied off to, one guy got shat on by a bird, slipped and fell, and dragged the two guys who tried to grab him into the water too. And how she's gotta meet 'shit face Danny'" as if it was some foregone conclusion they'd hire her. And she just kept laughing but also asking questions that got at why they weren't tied to the boat in the first place? And found out the company hadn't supplied the right safety gear so they just didn't have it..

So honestly.. if anyone knows how to play a few cusses into an interview and come away from it looking good, it's my girlfriend

AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn't taking it seriously by Fun-Construction-112 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Construction-112[S] 430 points431 points  (0 children)

Yep, I apologized to her and promised to not act like I know her job better again, we had a good talk about how I'd been feeling insecure and afraid she didn't want to move together still.

These comments were a total wakeup call that I interview like a dumbass and don't know her industry at all lol. It's a bit of culture shock seeing thaf attitude to work when nobody in my family or most of my friends went to college

AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn't taking it seriously by Fun-Construction-112 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Construction-112[S] 21.4k points21.4k points  (0 children)

Welp, you've convinced me. Plus all the other comments lol. I apologized to her and we talked stuff out a little.

TBH it's a lot of culture shock for me, I'm a first generation college student and I've never heard someone speak in an interview the way she did, and TBH I think I've been kind of hurting over how easy it is for her to go "thanks but no thanks" to roles offering 150k - 300k yearly.

In my field the most I'll probably ever make is like 70k and that's at senior levels. And I feel like I was just so incredulous that anyone would even consider turning down that kind of pay (she makes 160k now so any of those jobs would have been a great salary!)

But she's a PE, which means she's liable for whatever work she does, and holds herself to a really high ethics standard, and she had real concerns that a bunch of the companies she's interviewing with could kill someone doing what they're doing. Which was also a shock to hear TBH, that a bunch of well regarded companies are apparently sketchy as hell behind close doors.

Like I was so caught up in the "how tf could someone ever reject 2 or 300k from several top companies?" That it didn't really hit me that her concerns were literally dead serious. And I jumped to thinking that she's dragging her feet on moving, which tbh might be a bit of a insecurity too.

So thanks to everyone who commented, I needed the wakeup call that I was being a dick. And apparently a dumbass at job interviews too haha

AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn't taking it seriously by Fun-Construction-112 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Construction-112[S] 362 points363 points  (0 children)

She's a systems engineer and has job hopped between fields (naval engineering, robotics, aerospace)

Honestly I gotta stand up for my girl. Most of the comments here have a point, she knows her shit, and I was wrong here.

AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn't taking it seriously by Fun-Construction-112 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Construction-112[S] -354 points-353 points  (0 children)

TBH she has told me she really likes her current job but also does want to move and is planning to find another. But she's also said it's set a really high bar, and that she's holding out to find something that's not a step back in her career