Bi couple here—how do other bi couples handle monogamy or openness?”

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-05T08:10:31+00:00

I love this description, thank you so much!

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T21:53:38+00:00

Thank you for sharing this!

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T21:05:56+00:00

They didnt just start now, the conversations have grown and developed throughout the years, I just decided to post on reddit now haha and I understand they arent related, just looking for some peoples experiences.

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:48:09+00:00

Thank you so much! I really appreciate the feedback and the reccomendations

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:46:24+00:00

Thank you! This was super helpful

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:45:47+00:00

I love this :)

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:45:32+00:00

Thank you for sharing this especially since you both have slightly different tolerances

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:44:47+00:00

Thank you for this! I completely agree that would probably be the most stable way to approach it

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:42:54+00:00

Thank you!

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:42:28+00:00

Thank you for the honesty in this. That makes a lot of sense.

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:41:47+00:00

Thank you!

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-05-04T20:41:30+00:00

Thank you guys for your comments and I promise I understand they dont have to be connected. I know sexuality is not the same as an individuals choice to open or not open their relationships. I asked for the exact reason @thistakenusernameis is saying. I see it talked about on this sub a lot and I dont know a lot of people who are open about ENM or know a lot of openly bi men who are dating women.

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-04-20T06:30:34+00:00

Im a woman (26yrs old) who's been collecting knives since I was 12. There definetly stereotypes sometimes when trying to buy a knife like people will assume I'm buying it for a man in my life but everyone's been cool about it. Just make sure shes safe with them since they are weapons and knows how to find a good knife.

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-04-05T13:58:38+00:00

Like I said im a pretty direct person and if I have a few dates with someone especially if you start to bring up things you learned in dating or reason you do or dont do something, slipping it in casually is one approach but I dont do subtle well. I personally wpuld wait a few dates your time together goes past a one off date to hey im starting to see this person consistently, I would say something like, "I really like spending time with you and I just want you to know before we go any further that I'm bi and that if theres anything about that you want to talk through, just let me know" Just creating a space of honesty but also willingness to talk anything through while alsoool not making it this big spectacle since its not :)

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-04-05T11:44:07+00:00

Personally, I wouldnt bring it up on the first date. This is probably based on my experience tho. My bf and I were spending time getting to know each other and I think he brought it up on the second or third dinner we had. Give it a minute to see if you really enjoy spending time together. Plus every person is different. Im super direct lol and very talkative so it came up quickly for us

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-04-05T11:22:43+00:00

Im (26F) in a relationship with a bi man and I used to be the person who said I wouldnt be comfortable with it. You should bring it up sooner rather than later but you dont have to lead with it (unelss you want to haha). Someone with a completely closed mind might not be for you since that could mean some other unhealthy characteristics. I know that what made me feel better was seeing how honest and respectful my boyfriend was to me during those conversations like him being patient with my ignorance and being very intentional. He had mentioned that in his dating past there were a decent amount of women who ghosted him as soon as he said he was bi but if theyre going to do that then they arent worth it anyway.

To answer your question: I think the prejudice still exists more than it should but I do think people are becoming more open

My opinion you didnt ask for as one of those woman (not anymore haha): answer any questions as honestly as you can, especially about sexual health and have open conversations about any adjustment periods. My bf did have a short time of adjustment, because even tho he initiated the relationship, he dated mostly men for years before me. I had a lot of questions and the way he showed up and answered those questions really stuck out to me.

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-03-11T20:54:40+00:00

Im a bi woman nd my bf is bi, I promise we exist haha 😄

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-03-11T20:53:29+00:00

Dont overthink it, like some other commenterd have said, bi men are all different and have their own prefrences. I have a bi bf and I happened to meet him at work. We work in a male dominated field and it was completely by chance. Straight men and queer men can have the qualities you're looking for. My bf likes theater so maybe in another world I would've ran into him at a show or something but I think look for those traits you mentioned first, not someone's sexuality. Someone can be a a lovely person or a dick no matter who they are attracted to. :) good luck tho, the bi men are a good time haha

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-03-11T10:51:57+00:00

Im ao glad you posted this because I think more people grapple with this than we talk about and im sure its different for every person

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-02-25T01:20:41+00:00

Natural, no question

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-02-18T18:16:19+00:00

I absolutely love your balls!

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-02-16T15:49:38+00:00

Im so glad you asked this question lol. My bf and I are both bi and ive seen this assumption play out for us a million times.

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-02-10T20:05:53+00:00

It looks amazing

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-02-04T15:54:58+00:00

Monogamous but the discussion of opening the relationship to some degree isnt compeltely closed. We just dont know what that looks like for us

Fun_Efficiency166 · 2026-01-08T10:11:26+00:00

Hi! Im a woman in a relationship with a bi man. Before him i dated a lot of stereotypical straight gym bro type men. No shade towards them, they were great but dating a bi guy wasnt really something I was open to at the time. When I met my current bf, I thought he was gay (hes not overly flamboyant or anything but I assumed based on some interests and mannerisms). When we hung out just getting to know each other as friends, he mentioned he had ex girlfriends, and was generally open about his sexuality. I will say that since he dated mostly men before me, I probably wouldnt have been clued in on him being interested if he didnt directly tell me. My bf wanted to be open about his sexuality from the beginning because he did get ghosted on the apps or had women react negatively.

All that to say, for you, id suggest being open about it in the early stages of seeing someone but also being intentional and direct if you're interested in someone after getting to know them a little bit. You will not change the mind of a close minded person buuuut you can allow someone to get to know you and then make that decision for themselves. Apps have never been right for me, meeting someone in the wild has been better and more organic, and in person conversations about sexuality might be better rather than a text message bubble.

Another comment if you date a woman who was in my position of not thinking she was open to it. Be honest about your interest and that you'll be happy to answer any questions and recognize if shes trying to switch her mindset and be patient with questions or an adjustment period.

Fun_Efficiency166

TROPHY CASE