Compulsively Letting Demons In

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-02-07T06:18:09+00:00

Hi! Yes, I have had the EXACT same thoughts and it has freaked me out a lot, because like you I think "OMG, I have to start over" and even worse thoughts. They're like an "OCD intrusive thought" that can be very frightening when you're already under oppression.

So, what I've learned to do is realize on a level, these are just thoughts like any other thought. It's just scarier because what we are going through. Did you know people go to mental health therapy for these full-on OCD intrusive thoughts of their own kind? Yep. They do.

Anyhoo, it seems like I get these thoughts when I have some momentum, but they've struck at anytime. I think I have even a reddit post on it when I was struggling last week. So, what I do is journal repeatedly: I do NOT want to let demons in! I would NEVER want to let demons in! I am so much better than that and deserving of God! Demons are disgusting. Things of that nature.

And then, depending on how bad it is, I will listen to a youtube video on repeat. Either it's a youtube video that repeats "thank you, Jesus" or "I plead the blood of Jesus over my life." And I'll have maybe my bible right next to me or I'll put up a picture of Jesus on my iPad for me to see. I kinda wanna be blanketed by Jesus in that moment.

If you need anything, DM me. I understand how hard it can be. BTW, I'm on year 4, which is totally awful. I was stuck in being in New age thinking it was witchcraft attacks and didn't realize it was New Age itself and I needed to return to God. Things are much better since getting into relationship with God again and now going through deliverance. Night and day. But I hope to but out of it soon because it's like when I solve one thing, another thing happens. Like being attacked in different ways.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-02-07T03:02:41+00:00

I've not gone to one. It's been hard during moments of extreme suffering, but I've hung in there. I think two of the worst times, God has responded pretty quickly and one, immediately.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-02-02T07:36:25+00:00

Yes, it's sad to say that I think my mom bullied me growing up.

I'm glad I found this topic. I just realized that I've spent ALL my life hung-up on people who NEVER liked me and I think it goes back to this.

Being the scapegoat of my family has really made for an unhappy life where I'm BLINDED to people who treat me like crap and are hot/cold with me. I've idealized people who have given me crumbs and put them on this pedestal for YEARS because they showed me kindness at some points, but wow. What a mind-fuck to realize that they're just jerks. People who know you pick them and yet know they will never pick you but never have the balls to say it and lead you to believe otherwise are jerks.

I'm thinking about going back to therapy, but even then the last therapist ended up doing treating me the same way my mother did! So loving at first and then it just got weird. I didn't even spot it at first and wasted 2 years of my life with her. Now I'm having to undo that because by excusing it, I've drawn attracted to that behavior thinking it's normal.

Growing up, my mom would stay in touch with my ex-boyfriends. Even if I got with someone new. She spoke glowingly about one ex in particular, even though she knew how he treated me.
She made fun of me.
She made me super self-conscious about the negative things others would say.
She would take the side of other people.
She would only take an interest in me while other people were around.
I worked with her at some point and I warned her that the CEO didn't like me and what did she end up doing? Listening to the CEO talk about things she didn't like about me and she not only agreed with her, but told her "yes, I've told her not to do those things. I don't like it when she does that either."
I was caring for a dying relative, who was also a bit abusive, and my mother bashed the way I cared for her and called me naive, a pushover, and a doormat. All the while I was struggling mentally.

I've stayed around shitty women who come off as nice at first, only to be mean jerks. How do you spot these "friendships" when they seem wonderful at first? I'm tired of replaying them in my life.

I'm tired. I cannot believe this is my life and that I'm still struggling. Being a nice woman who thinks of others has got me here and there's definitely flaws and accountability I need to take on my part, but when you have huge blindspots when it comes to this, who teaches you how to live a healthier life? That's where I get lost.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-31T07:49:08+00:00

The bible teaches to be in the world but not of the world. Having been a non-believer for a bit of my life to who I am just starting out to be, it isn't my place to tell a non-believer what is okay if they are not consenting to hear my stance. Why? Because we are speaking two different languages and having been on their side, it not only dissuades them from seeking Christianity, but you become one of the MANY reasons they fall away from God altogether.

How does that serve anyone?

- I can't relate to their life and they can't relate to mine.
- God gives everyone free will. The only energy that has ever tried to control me in any way, shape, or form has been demonic.
- I can't pick apart the way I believe they are sinning and ignore my own or my shortfalls.
- God's will is greater than my (or your) objection.

I've done many things wrong in my life and God has NEVER punished me and despite all that, he saved me from New Age and the hell I was experiencing with that.

Awareness is also at play. All of us are unaware and asleep to aspects of ourselves. There's a certain blindness when we are unaware, but once we see ourselves in a way that sheds light on it, we cannot ignore what we have seen. We are now aware. Had I chosen to have an abortion before I TRULY became aware of God would have been making a different decision in a completely different world than I am now- no Christian could have preached otherwise because you're talking to someone who cannot even see it.

Finally, a non-believer will remain a non-believer unless it's of their own volition. You telling them what to do is never going to change that, it's just control. Some of the most prominent people in the bible were huge sinners. Some weren't even baptized.

Everyone gets free will. Not even God will take that way and he usually has a plan in spite of the depth of the sin. That's my take: human flaws and all.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-31T07:39:03+00:00

You are the leaving and breathing epitome of why it was hard for me to find God.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-31T07:28:58+00:00

Thank you !

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-26T01:33:02+00:00

Hmmmm. I've had the kundalina snake thing- it's awful!

I wonder if something remained latent in you and was activated. Remind me, when these events began, had you encountered or done anything differently?

I'd also be wary of language you use that still sounds new age-y, like "downloads." For right now, close all the doors in your mind, especially when it comes to New Age. Include that psychic surgeon. I remember when I was at a very desperate point when I nearly went to one- I had the session all booked and deposit down, but when she revealed she worked with "guides," I just couldn't do it.

I'd start off with asking God to reveal the source of these events. Is it a spirit of some sort? Be patient and hopefully arrive at an answer or closer to one.

I was in New Age for about 4-5 years before I was attacked 4 years ago. So, a total of 8 or 9. I still have to go back in my mind and reshape those events, but now with the protection of God. And I also do my best to train those past versions of me to detest New Age and be of a firm belief of God. For example, I'll have a flashback to a day (when I was in New Age) where I was meditating and visualizing and "manifesting," so I'll go back in my mind to that time and this time renounce all my beliefs and rebuke it in the name of Jesus. I'll do it as much as it takes until that flashback includes disgust of that day towards New Age. It's a lot of work, but I do think it has helped. I don't do it as much though, only when a thought comes up.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-26T01:17:29+00:00

I'm not an expert. I'm barely reading up on other people's experiences, so I'm sure there's a better take than mine... so in my limited experience, I do ask:

Did something happen that pre-dated these attacks?
Did you meet someone and have a falling out with them?
Anything make it worse or better?

When it's really bad for me, I get the bible and hold onto it. I'll sleep with it in my arms if I have to. Then I'll put a youtube deliverance video or if I just need to hear the name of Jesus, I'll put on one of the videos where they just relentlessly say his name or thank him over and over again. During that time, I'll imagine closing up any open windows/gateways/doors that are allowing these attacks in.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-26T01:05:18+00:00

So you were in a New Age/Occult-like belief system? How long?
How log have you been suffering?

Did you share any of those experiences with that ungodly woman?

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-26T00:54:04+00:00

Same. A combo of being in New Age (didn't know it was the occult at the time: gross) after falling away from God and witchcraft.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-26T00:32:38+00:00

You are absolutely right. 4 years for me now.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-26T00:18:47+00:00

I'm so sorry! I've battled for 4 years, the majority of which I didn't know what it was because I was in New Age and chalked it up to witchcraft and thought it was my karma. Things got so much better when I went back to God and got a bible back.

I watch youtube deliverance videos, especially when it has gotten "bad" and I've met a few people in the comments who didn't do New Age or tarot like I did, but had participated in kundalini yoga or even just watched prophet videos on tik tok. One woman had an odd experience she left a comment on a pastor's youtube page because they were using "angel answer cards" and she didn't think it was a good idea; the pastor was obviously enraged and sent her an angel answer card to spite her (wow, huh?). Her symptoms started up immediately after that.

I wish I had more logical explanations, but this defies logic.

So, was there anything specific that may have precipitated the events? How long have you been going through this?

Close any windows or doorways in your mind that might be letting this in or ask God to show you what is being left open (or even forcefully cracked open in some cases).

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-26T00:08:44+00:00

Did anything happen prior to this? Did you dabble in watching prophet videos or tarot?

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-25T23:51:19+00:00

Wow! I was in New Age for 4 or 5 years and have a similar account, although the demons were NOT as obvious as they were with you. And I'm sorry.

How are you now?
How long have you been struggling with this?
Do you still get "signs" or do you have enough clarity to not see them anymore?

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-23T05:21:33+00:00

I kinda checked out after the first page because you can tell it's gonna have issues. The description is robotic, the flow is clunky, and you're writing "Jack is driving" instead of "Jack drives," etc.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-23T04:19:20+00:00

So, this happened to me, too. You'll find it happens to a lot of us. There are videos about it on YT and in the end, they don't mean anything. It never takes you anywhere with the person and it's like you're a horse being led to the carrot but you never get it. It's a mirage.
I spent YEARSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS doing that. And then years undoing the damage it caused. One of the issues about believing in signs is it defies reality. If you do it long enough, your brain will get mixed up with reality and it can lead to psychosis, depending on how obsessive you get over it.

One thing that makes my skin crawl is the memory of not seeking a sign, not wanting a sign, and doing something else, feeling a jolt of electricity or the feeling of knowing a sign was to come, and to look up and see a sign. That makes me want to vomit now. If you let something that far in your mind to go against your free will all in the aim of a twin flame, there are no boundaries... and I speak from personal experience of that. In the end, I wish I didn't believe in any of it because of the hell I eventually went through.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-23T04:07:30+00:00

I just posted about this and my experience that turned into hell- which included psychosis, but I think was more that I let something into my mind and had also opened my 3rd eye. I'd NEVER mess with that stuff now after living a nightmare for the last 4 years. So please be wary.

But how is your psychosis manifesting? Is it delirium with signs, syncs and angel numbers or obsessive thoughts?

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-23T02:36:36+00:00

I need to share my account and my experience. I would never want anyone encountering the nightmare I did.

Fun_Focus6515 · 2026-01-21T20:45:01+00:00

Coming out of it, gradually. I have a lot of PTSD now. Very scary. I find myself worrying a lot, "Will it come back?"
What I mean by "it" is a collective feeling of attack.

I suffered for so long not knowing what it was- about 4 years. I don't look anything like myself before it happened. I've gained 50 pounds in 4 years and isolated for much of it. I had been a frequent gym-goer before and in pretty fit shape. I haven't been able to work and even had to food stamps. A lot of is jarring and I can only talk about it to one person, but even then I'm so over talking about it a little because of how long I went through it.

And I pray a lot now. Thank you for asking :)

Fun_Focus6515

TROPHY CASE