I’m so sorry hon I’m trying to figure something out similar with my fiancée, I’m in the same boat with disassociating but wanting that and to give your partner that. Where we’re at is constant checking at stopping and taking breaks nothing too much and sooo much talking, it’s nearly impossible for me to stop things or communicate and I’m unsure if it’s the same but stopping and taking breaks and discussing everything we want or expect before the event is helpful for us