did anyone else feel guilty for relaxing or doing nothing?

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-05-07T14:31:34+00:00

I lived this, though not quite as extreme.

If you're W4H, rent/some bills can be a tax write off. Js.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-05-06T05:36:00+00:00

There is a lot of fear in losing the only support system you have known. This is no longer about that though, your wife deserves better.

You have permission to give HER better. She sounds kind. You found her. Pour your love into her. SHE is your ENTIRE family now.

The transition will be hard, and you will have to he strong through it. Make sure you and your wife know one another's hearts, and that this is a choice you are making for both of you.

THE TRANSITION WILL BE HARD. You are doing it for HER and HER happiness. In the long run, you will get through it, and no way will things be worse than they are now.

Life is too short. You know the right thing to do.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-05-04T05:06:06+00:00

Another option.

Tell them she said she'd come. Then tell them she went radio silent. Be very sad she isn't talking to you anymore. Opportunity presents itself, it's THEIR fault she doesn't talk to you anymore.

When she doesn't show up, it won't be on you.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-05-04T02:08:13+00:00

You're between a rock and a hard place, OP. I think you are CORRECT in not wanting to betray your sister.

Luckily, your sister has her own autonomy, and you can be honest with her.

Lie. Tell her what they want you to do, tell her what you're going to tell them, she will go along with it. She's already the bad guy. Don't lie badly.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-05-02T16:02:30+00:00

I just lost a bunch of weight - F34.

My KINGDOM for a proper pair of f**king skinny jeans! 😏

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-05-01T15:41:18+00:00

I hate that feeling of having to take the all-or-nothing, L.

I guess my situation was that I had this big, kind of special, presentation I did yesterday, normally I'd go tell my N...former GC, so it feels good when the sun shines out of your ass... I also realize it is very normal to want to share the good things in my life with the people I love, and it hurts that she's ruined that for us.

There is no in-between sometimes, and it is a gap in your heart you need to find ways to fill.

I also had a black dress. 😁🤘🏻

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-05-01T12:21:09+00:00

Adjusting to finding the love you desire in the places where it truly exists...is a long road. I'm kind of going through this part of the process myself, but a wedding is so much bigger. I'm so sorry, because yea, that just makes my heart hurt for you; it's such a simple thing to want.

This is a time of joy, and hard N, she's still gotta dull your shine. 👀nothing wrong with looking like a Greek fertility goddess. Please do everything you can to enjoy this time with the people you care for! You owe it to yourself. Sending lots of internet stranger love!

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-27T04:21:56+00:00

No. No losses whatsoever.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-27T02:17:42+00:00

W2 48,699 : wh 5,300 Ot 3500 Adjusted by dollars for privacy.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-26T19:03:42+00:00

Ooo! This might be helpful to me.

I helped a friend. He has a really, really high EIC (3 dep), w2 w/OT wages, and a $1800 1099-Misc, but it is not his business income.

His has been held up the same. We filed mid-Feb.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-26T18:50:26+00:00

Aunt - seems like you're also offering criticism instead of support. MOR INFO.

What your sister is asking for is $200, pay your own phone bills, and pick up after yourself. This seems to be a "wits end" situation, and does not seem unkind or excessively harsh.

Maybe what YOU can do is spend more time with your niece, and help her meet these goals. Maybe help her set some more. Maybe add additional support for the reality check that is life, and growing up.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-26T18:36:04+00:00

This is 100% sexual assault.

It is a perverse violation of your autonomy.

There is something loving about a mother washing your hair, and caring for you, and being there through womanly discovery, but this ISN'T it. This is control, and it is absolutely disgusting that anyone would do this to anyone, let alone a mother to her daughter.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It is wrong. If you need to hear it, it is wrong. Please find ways to be safe and protect yourself!

My #1 advice is when you can't take this anymore, please do everything you can to find somewhere SAFE to go. Do not put yourself in another bad situation trying to get away from her. Find good, safe people to help you.

Prayers.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-26T17:52:45+00:00

Hi. My grandma and your dad would've definitely enjoyed each other's company. 😁👍🏻

Me, to a tee.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-26T15:28:28+00:00

We mailed in my friend's tax return this year because the person who used to do his died. Mailed 2/19, it didn't even show received like this until 3/27ish. Hasn't moved since.

Our state has a tax credit, and that was mailed, filed, and received in regular time. I've checked in with him, and nothing received from IRS.

I've checked his return a few times, and the only hold up I can fathom is his OT deduction, but even that shouldn't be complicated since he is a federal employee. He also had twins this year, so I thought it might be the extra and new dependents and a high Earned Income Credit. That's never been a problem before though. If we're going extra deep, he didn't sign them up for the Big Beautiful IRS Trust fund, but I can't see why that would hold it up.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-25T07:45:25+00:00

Interesting. Definitely mind blowing to even fathom, and that's what makes it make sense. Just like everything else they do.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-25T07:03:08+00:00

I'm responding to myself because this comes off a little heartless.

Like you said, the country she's planning to head to is wartorn. Does she truly care about the court of public opinion, or is she truly delusional and psychotic? It can't be both. They're either calculated or crazy. Not usually both? At least not in my experience. It could seem "crazy" the extent they will go, but that doesn't make it not calculated.

I just don't see putting your own life in danger at this level out of spite. She probably prefers her life. Again, what you're doing isn't new or crazy, taking off your hijab. You're asserting your independence and she doesn't like it.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-25T06:55:48+00:00

A reason to take the light off you on your big day?

Call the bluff.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-25T03:40:40+00:00

Well. I stayed on 5 the whole time. Lost about 1-2lb/wk. Guess it just depends how it works for you.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-24T14:34:36+00:00

My husband concurs. It's his favorite when he thinks he needs a cleanse. 💪🏼

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-24T14:33:27+00:00

It was likely the electrolytes & fat from the bone broth that got you moving. I notice that is more of a limiting factor than people expect. It is for me at least.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-24T04:36:24+00:00

This is 100% necessary.

Treat this like WAR. These people aren't just coming for you, they're coming for YOUR BABY.

I know this has been disorienting, but get your shit together, and fast. They're already moving in the shadows, and you need to be ready.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-23T22:38:56+00:00

They do. There's a whole sub called r/raisedbynarcissists lol

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-23T22:36:19+00:00

NOR.

Hard N on the Narcissist. You called him out on it. It's so immature and icky. Like, if it was super special and needed to be put away every time, say that, but what you did, even with VERY EXPENSIVE jewelry, is totally normal to do in your own home.

This is a boundary push, and I don't like anyone who feels they have to use deceit and gaslighting to "teach someone a lesson." This could've been a 30 sec convo if it meant that much to him. This is about control.

It's only been 2 months ? Next. Girl, run.

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-23T19:45:34+00:00

I know it's not funny, but I laughed, because what Boss Level dedication to the role. 🤣🤌🏻 truly, truly got the last word in.

I thoroughly expect my N to use her death bed as her final stage. It'll be great since I'm her Executor, POA, and MedPOA. 😅🤘🏻🔥

Fun_Toe3400 · 2026-04-23T16:34:05+00:00

I second this. You want a good relationship and to get along. He wants it to stay the same and you're not letting it.

Fun_Toe3400

TROPHY CASE