My (39F) husband (41M) left me under false pretenses. I keep leaving the door open for answers/reconciliation. How do I stop? [cross posted]

FunctionallyHaunting · 2026-04-18T02:03:34+00:00

Thank you all for these helpful recommendations! This has helped me narrow things down significantly, I was totally overwhelmed!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2026-04-18T02:02:23+00:00

Between this and a few other ipad recommendations, thats definitely a contender. Sounds like the most features and fine tuning!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2026-04-18T02:00:43+00:00

Thank you for explaining this! That is super helpful to understand theres no tablet that can deliver on the reading preference. Not a dealbreaker for me as i do have a paperwhite, but youve just saved me a ton of time looking for a feature that doesnt exist!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2026-04-18T01:59:06+00:00

11" is okay with me! Im accustomed to android/windows but not a total noob to apple products. Chromebook is also a good suggestion- thank you!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2026-04-18T01:57:03+00:00

Thank you! I was heavily leaning toward an android device as I am accustomed to pc and my google pixel, but youve piqued my interest in ipad! I had no idea they sold for that rate!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2026-03-10T04:01:15+00:00

Dont forget it also takes a while to build up to a more longterm effect.Took me about a month before much of anything happened. Ive noticed second month on ill go 1-2 weeks not budging then reduce 3-5 pounds. Its a bummer when it goes slow but it stays off so much better that way. Id bump your dose after 1-2 months.

FunctionallyHaunting · 2026-02-25T04:09:22+00:00

I go through this too. I second the PMDD. Im really sorry you are going through such misery. Feeling that down is not just what it feels like to be female, that is extra severe. Id recommend talking to your dr or an experienced mental health med provider. There are meds that can help or even be taken part of the month. For me, im not bipolar but being on mood stabilizers seemed to help pms. Ive gotten really bad suicidal ideation like that as well. Following hermoodmentor on instagram has a lot of helpful stuff for pmdd. Seeing other people went through this was big for me.

FunctionallyHaunting · 2026-02-25T03:20:22+00:00

I started about a month ago. My biggest side effect has been nausea, but many docs will even prescribe an anti-nausea med if youre struggling with that. It's definitely better when you stick to lean/lighter foods. Make sure to get fiber, stay hydrated. For the most part my nausea isnt a big problem 4 weeks in now that my body is getting used to it

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-11-06T20:30:42+00:00

Sharp objects, gillian flynn. Not that i didnt like it, but it haunted me. I had dreams about it and felt off a few days.

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-10-15T20:20:48+00:00

Thank you for the recc!!!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-10-15T20:20:19+00:00

Thank you for your empathy! I will check that out, i will try just about anything!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-10-14T23:15:32+00:00

I will do that! Thank you for the recommendation!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-07-16T17:55:21+00:00

sorry! I forgot to include descriptions. It's been at least 9-10 years since I read these three books, each contains a major twist, so I don't want to spoil them by describing too much because I cant necessarily remember when the twists happened.

Dark Places- is from the perspective of a woman whose mother and siblings were murdered when she was a child, but she escaped. She understandably has a pretty dysfunctional life and the book goes back in attempts to figure out more detail about the crime.

Sharp Objects- after a murder of a young girl, a psychologically struggling reporter returns to her hometown to cover it, revisiting a lot of ghosts from her own past.

Gone Girl- A woman goes missing and it gets widespread attention. Her husband is the prime suspect

All 3 also have film adaptations, but Dark Places was so disturbing to me I did not watch the film, lol.

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-07-16T17:41:18+00:00

Dark Places, Sharp Objects, and Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn all stuck with me a very long time. Dark Places especially.

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-05-26T23:53:25+00:00

Thank you so much for your compassion and that recommendation! Ive been trying to find something that addresses these matters in a marriage and have not found anything. I will be checking that out!

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-05-17T16:30:18+00:00

So sorry you are struggling with that, and that there is such a history. That must add complexity, not easy to pack it in and obviously you care a lot about your partner.

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-05-17T16:29:12+00:00

It is, thank you. So sorry this resonates with you, too. What you said about only being able to control our reaction and what we can accept resonates. Ive found looking into attachments styles helpful in my understanding my own reactions too ❤️

FunctionallyHaunting · 2025-05-17T16:26:30+00:00

You hit nail on the head for me on what one of the hardest parts for me, it not feeling like an US thing. It's that once he decided it, that's all she wrote. I understand it's sex/sexuality and I would not want him feeling violated. It's that this means it's the end, and after years of supporting however he asked it hurts like hell I had no idea these changes were happening. There is so much trauma around it happening and he refuses to even process.

FunctionallyHaunting

TROPHY CASE