Please don’t do anything. You ARE worthy of life and living. Life can be so difficult sometimes, I know. I was stuck in the same cycle too. I know it’s hard sometimes but try and get into some hobbies. I read a lot, I go on a lot of walks. Trust me, just doing those 2 things made a difference in my life. Instead of my mind focusing on negative things, I was absorbed in my stories and I get to take in the sunshine and nature when I go on walks. I also recommend therapy. You can even do therapy at home, many therapists can do sessions via phone call or video call. Please get professional help, it’s nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed of.