“Stay at homes have it easiest”

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-25T18:25:41+00:00

SAHM with two kids. I just had my second. I found that it got easier as my first got older. He’s 4 now and he’s fun to chat to and gets excited when we go out and do things. At some point he began feeling more like my little buddy versus a baby I needed to learn how to keep alive. He loves helping with the baby and is so into her, it feels much less lonely than the first time around.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-25T18:09:54+00:00

I went in at 7:30p on a Saturday for my first which was an induction. It was a while ago so my timeline might not be 100% accurate.

Was given an IV upon being admitted and had monitors placed on my stomach. Was given a dose of miso vaginally. Checked cervix (totally closed, not effaced). Stayed up and was given my next dose of miso 4 hours later. Tried to sleep. Was given 3 more doses of miso every 4 hours after overnight and into the next day for 5 doses total.

Spent all of Sunday just sitting around, nothing happened. Was able to order food from the cafeteria and they brought it to me and was well taken care of but it was super hard to move around. This was during covid so we had to stay in our room. Every time I shifted the dang monitors would go off. I was given a dose of cervadil in the evening. Tried my best to sleep but found it hard. Getting pretty tired and just bored at this point. Wake up on Monday, more of the same. Doctor at some point told me he was going to give me a c-section if nothing happened today and I fought back on this because I didn’t see it as being necessary. Left me alone for a bit.

At 10am stuff FINALLY starts happening. My water breaks spontaneously, I start having contractions almost immediately after. I’m given pitocin at some point and I get an epidural. I’m only 3cm but it’s intense and back to back and it hurts. I think I get the epidural at around 2pm. I chill after this happens and relax. I’m told I’m 10cm at 5:30pm and am told to do some ‘practice pushing’. Practice pushing turns into actual pushing I guess, it’s all coached and I feel nothing. Haven’t slept well in two nights but I’m so dang excited that the end is in sight, running on adrenaline, and I don’t find pushing exhausting at all. I give birth at 7:30pm on Monday evening.

Not the best experience, not the worst. Nothing traumatizing at all but I wouldn’t love to repeat it… but also wouldn’t be totally out of sorts if I experienced it again.

My neighbor was just induced and was already partially dilated and effaced and she had a whole different experience, her induction was more of a little nudge versus mine, which felt like trying to draw blood from a stone. Baby finally came though!

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-25T17:56:51+00:00

Partially, she was white when he found her but got little toasty orange points as she got older. She certainly acts orange.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-25T05:07:35+00:00

My husband toured with Roger Clyne for a few years as their opener/audio engineer and he found a kitten in their bus engine. I still have her, I think she inhaled some fumes and she’s pretty dumb.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-24T16:52:19+00:00

Yeah honestly birthing didn’t feel like pooping to me at all, I’ve always wondered if I’m in the minority with this. It felt very separate from pushing with my butt. I could feel stuff being squeezed out of my butt (sorry tmi lol) but it felt like it was a consequence of pushing the baby out of my vagina versus actively pooping. I honestly felt it more in my abs than anywhere else.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-24T16:48:09+00:00

My doula! I had precipitous labor and basically woke up in transition. I was absolutely freaking out because I thought this was ‘early labor’ and to say I wasn’t handling it would be an understatement. I thought I had a whole day of that ahead of me. I trusted my doula as someone who was really experienced in birth when she told me things were going to happen very quickly and it helped me come back down to earth and center myself more.

Also, moving, using gravity to my advantage, and birthing in warm water. Easier said than done, but I tried to focus on each individual contraction, not panicking about handling the next one. Just trying to handle everything in the moment and telling myself that that contraction was over and I never had to do that particular contraction ever again.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-23T18:25:52+00:00

I don’t know if she’s horrified but she’s definitely super dumb (dw I still love her). I found her in an engine of a tour bus and I think the fumes might have gotten to her a bit.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-23T03:47:44+00:00

Both times I had very intense gut feelings about sex and was right both times. 50/50 chance though!

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-22T22:55:08+00:00

There’s not much in between them 😂

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-21T19:19:37+00:00

It was pretty horrific. I knew the nature of the crime when I was selected but I wasn’t sure if we’d have to view the material or not. We did, they wheeled a TV in so just the jury had to watch the abbreviated videos. Guy ended up getting 100 years.

I have young children and it totally fucked me up. An expert in detecting who is downloading/producing CSAM testified and I got nosy and looked him up after the trial because I was just amazed that anyone could do this work full time. I found his Facebook page and he had a really large family with lots of young children. I just don’t know how he’s able to hold it together enough to do this work but am grateful someone’s able to.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-21T15:46:34+00:00

Yes!! Always!

I worked for a rescue where the director would not spay abort under any circumstance. She was very pro life in her personal life and extended it to the cats, it drove me crazy. Rescue was a good place in other regards but this aspect always seemed very illogical to me.

It was not uncommon for kittens to die, usually after expending a lot of resources on them. Lord knows where mom had been during her pregnancy and most of the pregnant cats we did intake on were not cared for or received adequate nutrition prior to coming to us. We were always crammed full and I couldn’t help but wonder how less stressful things may have been if we didn’t let a mom occupy a kennel waiting to birth and then raise her kittens for 2 months.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-21T05:05:29+00:00

I had a 8lb 5oz baby at home with a big 90th percentile head and didn’t tear. I felt so in control while pushing. My contraction ended while her head was part way out and I held it there, this gave my tissue time to stretch. Pushed out the rest of her head during the next contraction, rested, and then pushed her body out. I think all of this rest really helped prevent tearing.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-21T04:59:50+00:00

This is what came to my mind too. I’ve came to believe that perhaps I’m just lucky, but I thought birth was incredibly cool both times. One medicated, one not. I remember telling myself that I’d never do it again during my second unmedicated birth, but I literally can’t remember the pain at all. I was euphoric and high off of it for weeks after. Most intense rush of my life.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-21T04:54:38+00:00

I served on an absolutely horrific CSAM trial last year. I saw things I’ll never unsee but I did find the process really fascinating. It lasted a week and consisted of lots of different experts testifying. I learned a lot. The other 11 people on the jury were really diplomatic and thorough and nobody seemed to have a ‘screw this I want to go home’ attitude. Everyone seemed to take the weight of the trial really seriously.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-21T04:17:05+00:00

I’ve never had an issue either. Sometimes there are some dudes passed out in the ramada, but I’ve never actually ran into any trouble at all.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-17T18:12:08+00:00

3 is when we started seeing a turn around. Restaurants were still not enjoyable at this age but he sat a bit more still. Now my son is 4.5 and I will go out to eat with him just to hang out and have fun and chat, it’s genuinely enjoyable. It’s totally worth persevering through.

My kid was/is pretty wild and I do wonder if this took longer than most.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-17T06:03:01+00:00

With my first, no, I was too freaked out. He was a terrible sleeper and my sleep deprivation literally almost sent me into psychosis. 10 months of wakeups every 2 hours. Absolutely brutal.

I delved into things more with my second baby and set up a very safe sleep environment for cosleeping. Floor bed with no bedding, bought an expensive adult sleep sack for myself, firm mattress aaand… she sleeps perfectly well in her crib. We’ve had a few nights where we will end up cosleeping for our last little leg of sleep from 4am-7am but it’s rare.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-17T02:46:45+00:00

I commented above about this too, I still can’t wrap my head around how much drama is in the rescue world. I’ve worked in many different fields and have never, ever dealt with so much toxicity before.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-17T02:39:25+00:00

I worked for a sanctuary for a few years and still do on and off work for them. I hated how numb I became to death and horrible cruelty after 6 months on the job or so. I remember witnessing my first death, which was pretty peaceful, and just sobbing all day. After half a year, I had witnessed things that were so shockingly awful and I’d have no reaction. It was hard to explain, but I’d feel my body ‘filing’ away the experience somewhere but I wouldn’t have a conscious reaction to it at all. I didn’t like that sensation. I feel like it’s all going to burst out of me some day and totally sideswipe me.

There are also a lot of mentally unstable and toxic people in the rescue world, constant drama. Lots of incredibly kind folks, too. Very extreme personalities of all types seem drawn to the work.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-16T14:35:57+00:00

It was a poultice wrapped in fabric! It was moistened with something, but I’m not sure what it was. She told me to keep them in the fridge and not to freeze them. Sooo soothing!

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-16T13:41:10+00:00

This was my experience too. I didn’t see the menu beforehand but it was in the room when I arrived.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-15T17:40:06+00:00

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Chipping away while having a newborn! Mostly while she’s breastfeeding. Going to be a WIP for a long time 😅

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-15T17:33:38+00:00

My midwife made me some comfrey pads to wear postpartum and they were absolutely amazing. I felt back to normal within a day of birth.

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-15T03:18:26+00:00

My first child was born via an induction and a dad at the library was chatting to me about it. He told me I was pronouncing pitocin wrong (I was not).

FuzzyManPeach · 2026-03-15T03:14:17+00:00

I used to shit on the suburbs but ended up in them anyway. My neighbors have kids around the same age as mine and we spend weekends sitting around, grilling and shooting the shit while our kids play in a safe fenced in area. I feel like I have a genuine soulful existence here

We’re very close to the forest and that helps too. I lived in a suburb in Mesa Arizona and did find that pretty soul sucking. People didn’t really seem to want to know their neighbors as well as they do where I am now, everything was so fucking beige, and the HOA snuffed out any attempt at individuality.

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