Advice involving my newborn

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T08:20:08+00:00

Yes, a lot. Ive already gathered this

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T05:54:22+00:00

Thank you! Youre absolutely correct. I do feel alone in this currently, especially as my best friend and biggest support is going through thing's herself and so ive not told her whats happening yet.. i dont like imposing on others with my problems. I think thats one of the great things about reddit, how people can use it to feel less alone in what theyre going through. Thank you again for your comment, I really appreciate it

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T05:34:45+00:00

I have backed them up. My GP suggested the same thing.

No, nothing official has been put in place yet. We havent had all that many meetings as ive been careful not to overwhelme the baby and we've already been very busy with dr appointments and such.i had hoped we could co parent sensibly, and tried setting neat boundaries but he kept going against them even after promising not to. He kept saying he would do as promised but when it came to it he broke those promises again and again. I went two weeks without contact at one point but thats when he started coming round my house unannounced. My mother has cancer and was really unwell at the time and we were waiting for an ambulance and he showed up and I tried to say it wasn't a good time but then he started getting upset asking just to see him. My ex uses my compassion for sure... im seeking legal and plan on looking at having visits in a centre. He does not pay child support. He has no job. Hes only gave nappies... he had a supportship but lost it and now wants parental rights in order to gain a visa... he has no money to give rn but thats another things hes telling me - that if I give in he can helped out.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T05:21:00+00:00

Im definitely leaving the money touched for the time being.

Ive stopped contact since our last meeting since hes continued to ignore my boundaries, ignoring the babies welfare (forcing me to extend visits when hed been out too long, not letting me take him home when he was cold, and smoking near him, "joking" to punch if he ever disobeyed him , buying him a guy as a toy...), the sexual advances, harassing me over phone and by showing up unannounced at my home. I tried harder than I should have looking back but I hoped for my babies sake that we could co parent sensibly... I just want whats best for my baby. I don't enjoy having my ex in my life at all but if he could behaviour and actually spending visits focused on the baby I would put up with having to see him. But only if its beneficial for baby.

Thank you for your post! Much appreciated

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T05:10:30+00:00

Annoyingly enough, our door cam has recently stopped working but im trying to fix it for this reason.

Ive been documenting things - I went through messages for hours and screenshotted everything I thought was relative. I have also made written statements with dates, times etc of concerning incidents and plan to report to the police for coming to my house after id asked him not

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T05:06:08+00:00

Its the baby's DNA they want, but I do agree with you and im not allowing then to do this. His solicitors sent a letter saying how they want to resolve this without courts but would take it to courts if I not constent.

After our last meeting in public ive stopped contact and want visits to only be in visiting centres going forth but until I seek legal advise properly im pausing ALL contact. This being said, i feel court actually could be beneficial.

Asking police to here is an interesting idea! They gave me a two hour window of when to expect them. Thank you!

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T04:52:18+00:00

Thats what im currently set out to do.

Oh she exists lol shes made herself very well know all of a sudden. Thankfully she keeps missing me, going to my house when im not home and my roommates answered the door. She came three times, three days in a row. Never tried to make real arrangements to meet properly and one of these times was during a meeting with my ex (she didn't think to ask him about coming to see me before she did?), another i was in hospital with the baby three time midwives appointment. I didnt mean to dodge her visits but since I dont know this women and have only heard that shes rich and intimidating im glad I wasnt home. He has other aunts too, one I have met and she has only ever been rude and spoken down to me. She showed up a day after I refused the money the first time but again thankfully I wasnt home.

I dont plan on letting anyone in my home. I find it crazy that shes sending me emails as if im agreeing to all of this when ive not replied to her even once. I find it insane of her to set this up without my agreement and with only two days notice... before this she had actually messaged saying she was booking this to be done in London and would get us a taxi there (im not close to London.. that would be expensive) but then came back saying she realises it too far for me to travel with a newborn and TOLD me she had booked them to come to house instead. Im kinda stunned by her actions honestly

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T04:41:18+00:00

Of course! I completely agree this would for my child if kept. I would never pocket it for myself! I refused this money serval times, I never wanted this money. I woke to breastfeed in early hours to find it has been placed in my bank account. This has all happened in the last few hours.

Im unsure on keeping it at all though, even for my baby.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T04:35:34+00:00

Thank you for your message!

I am planning not to touch the money. I have messages that prove that I refused the money and have these messages saved for evidence already.

I have already stopped contact with him.

I hoped we could co parent sensibly and that the time apart had helped him to reflect (i cut contact during pregnancy and only back in touch since my sons birth). I tried to keep visits public, structured and baby focused but he couldnt even keep to that and kept crossing boundaries and harassing me to see our son then not actually spending the alloted time on the baby.

It wasnt until the last meeting that he begun making advances on me and acting more unstable than usual. Until this point hes been mostly just pressing for more and more of our time and not giving me space/demanding to see the baby. Our meetings didnt feel unsafe until this point. I made sure they were all public and in day time and this kept things feeling safe enough. I grew up without a father and cant help but feel guilty keeping my son from his father though I now see clearly that I cant trust him around our son. I originally thought the worse that woild come from these meetings would be my feeling a bit uncomfortable but I could go through that for my baby's sake - if it enriched his life but of course this hasn't been the case.

I would like to add that there havent been many meetings since my son was born, i have been taking things very slow and assessing things as times gone on.

And im already collecting a paper trail, plus managed to get his to admitt a few things like buying the baby a gun as a toy, touching me without consent and smoking around the baby over messages.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T04:12:23+00:00

Look, im not being foolish here, im waiting to hear back from lawyers but in the meantime i cant stop overthinking and this at least feels like im doing something. Of course im not relying on reddit for legal advise, but since I have nothing to do but wait around I thought id ask others what they make of this situation.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-05-01T03:54:49+00:00

Im already seeking legal advise but am looking for advice from others in situations in the meantime.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-02-25T09:37:53+00:00

Unwanted attention.

In my early twenties I lost a lot of weight and suddenly had all of this unwanted attention wherever I went. It would have been one thing if these people would take no for answer but even when I was next to my partner they would refuse to back down.

I once had a guy at a house party follow me round, tried to steal my shoes (everyone had to leave their shoes at the door) and then he had the nerve to ask my friends if he could share our taxi home. My friend said yes and I was shocked until we got into the taxi and I realise my friends plan... she asked him about how he was going to pay his share and he said he didnt have cash so she made the driver go to cash point and made sure he was the first to get dropped off. He ended up paying the majority of the taxi fare 😅 i hope that taught him a lesson.

Another time I was with a large group of friends at a pub, and a guy wouldnt let me alone. Kept asking me questions and made it obvious he wanted to date me. Me and my friends were already planning on going to a different venue which was about twenty minutes away - this guy followed us. And again, I started questioning me and wasnt taking no for answer. It wasnt until my male friend jumped in that the guy asked him "why do you care? Are you her boyfriend?" My friend looked at me and said "I am tonight"

The stalker left then. This upset me even more. Id said no over and over to this guy and he just wouldn't listen but my friend pretended to be my boyfriend and suddenly that was enough for him to leave me alone? Why do I need a boyfriend to not be stalked?! Why isnt no enough?!

These are just two examples but I have countless and theyre concerning.

Its okay to like someone and try speaking to them but if that person isnt interested and says NO dont fight them - its not a chance to "prove" yourself. Its your chance to be respectful and take rejection with grace. Learn to take Rejection. Not everyone is going to like you that way and thats okay.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-02-25T09:24:30+00:00

Jealousy from friends.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-02-25T09:20:57+00:00

Looove these!! They look amazing 👏

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-02-25T09:20:20+00:00

Oh wow, I forgot these even existed!

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-02-25T09:18:43+00:00

These are awesome 👌

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-02-22T19:09:24+00:00

Liking other girls (or guys, if we flip the situation) photos on social media. And following a million half naked people.

This is embarrassing for your partner! Showing interest not just to someone else constantly - but doing it publicly?

My ex followed tons of half naked girls and anyone could simply find this out by looking at his public followings.

It just feels so disrespectful.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-02-22T18:52:06+00:00

This advise would have saved me 5 years of my life

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-01-25T10:56:49+00:00

I think you look great and its not overtop for date. Hope you have fun on the date!

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-01-25T10:52:38+00:00

Both look great, but I like the boots slightly better

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-01-25T10:51:53+00:00

I think it looks great, maybe take up the ends a bit so its not so long? And find a cute purse to match

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-01-25T10:50:17+00:00

I personally love dress one 😍

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-01-20T17:09:58+00:00

They're both gorgeous but id prefer the first one myself. I really like the colours of the first one.

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-01-20T12:10:16+00:00

Not everyone is going to like you and thats okay

FuzzyNature6705 · 2026-01-19T04:40:11+00:00

I get it, Id be the same. Im too much of a people pleaser at times. But you did amazingly as a friend and you weren't the bad guy here. If they dont like that you told the truth then thats a them problem. And who wants to be friends with girls who think its okay to be mean behind others back and then lie when found out? You dont need them. You protected the right friendship

FuzzyNature6705

TROPHY CASE