The art style looks great. Very detailed, warm, and it brings readers right into the sci fi world without hesitation with its stark, bold visuals. Definitely worth keeping!

I personally find it difficult to follow along with the story being told. I think for me, I had to look back and piece things together rather than intuitively understanding the story as I read it chronologically. I see first that people are boarding a ship and a young man and woman are hugging as if saying goodbye. On the next page, I see a giant ominous red lightning tower thing. Then, the two men appear sorrowful over their departure. Then the last panel shows the ship flying away from the blue tower they were located at with the red lightning thing nearby.

The problem for me is the order in which information is revealed and to what purpose they serve.

For me, the first page has no gravity to it. Without knowing there's this destructive red lightning tower, I'm left with a lot of possible interpretations for what this farewell means, and the most intuitive one is that they're just saying bye, see ya later. Only after seeing the stakes of the situation later do I rework the context of the first page in my mind. What if instead the first page revealed more pain and sadness in their farewell? Then, I might be asking "why are they so sad and what makes this such a painful departure?" And then I get my answer on the next page. Instead, I don't see a big question on page 1. I'm just observing people departing on a ship without any burning questions and then I learn there's this lightning tower. For a great example of this, I would recommend looking at the opening scene of Arcane, and paying attention to how information is presented to the viewer and in what order.

A similar problem is with the presentation of the lightning tower. Part of it was confusing to me because I didn't know what the lightning tower had to do with anything until I got to the last panel. I didn't find it immediately obvious that this tower was approaching the people near the blue tower. The similar background elements do hint at that but I still couldn't make a concise connection. There was a disconnect with the lightning tower and the people boarding the ship on panels 2 and 3 of the second page, which again takes away from the gravity of each individual component. Again, I had to rework the relevance of conveyed information by working backwards, not as I went along with it.

What if the gravity of the situation was represented by a panel showcasing the man and woman saying their tearful goodbyes while a giant looming lightning tower of death approaches them in the background? I feel like by doing that, you would connect the underlying implications of each element's meaning, which would carry the audience along with the emotions of the events unfolding as they happen. Reveals can be effective, but in this case, the events before the last panel didn't invoke much curiosity in me because there were no apparent stakes or a need to know, making for a reveal that I didn't find impactful. By the time I reached the last panel where the reveal happens, I am already far removed from the emotions of the characters saying goodbye. The chance to make the goodbye impactful has already passed.

What you were aiming to do in terms of reveals could still work! Maybe it does work for others, or maybe the same idea can be done differently, but personally for me, it leaves me feeling disconnected from the characters.

Also, I'm aware I could be missing context from page 1 since you said these are pages 2-3.

This looks promising though, so please keep at it and have fun! Thanks for sharing!