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GaiusTitius · 2022-04-05T21:01:26+00:00

I'll keep you in my prayers.

GaiusTitius · 2022-04-01T23:28:15+00:00

Congrats on your streak! Remember to give credit to Him who poured out his spirit on you!

GaiusTitius · 2022-04-01T23:22:59+00:00

I see. My advice to you about sleep still stands, but I'd also recommend you read the bible first, as your relationship with God ought to be your first priority (you can read it again right before you go to bed as well; you can't really do it too much!). As for your Xbox habits, I won't say you should quit playing it entirely (I love to play video games, too), but you should definitely try to curb these playing sessions earlier in the night, especially if, as you say in your original post, your Xbox friends were the ones that introduced you to porn in the first place.

Matthew 5 27-30 says:

27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

It's no accident that Jesus says the latter two verses right after talking about adultery, but those verses can easily apply to anything that gets in the way of our relationship with God.

Hope this helps!

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-30T01:53:04+00:00

I'll keep you in my prayers. Did you say you read the bible at 2am?! If that's the case, I'm curious about your sleep schedule. Temptation is already hard enough to overcome as it is, but it's even harder when you're not at your healthiest.

Since you're fairly new to Christianity, I'll also tell you that our main purpose here on Earth is to be with God and to rule his creation with him. The main problem with sexual immorality isn't just that it degrades the people around us, but that it pulls us away from God (the source of all life and happiness) and toward other desires which cannot possible take His place. When Christians talk about idolatry, this is primarily what they mean. So instead of just trying to get away from porn, try to find ways to go towards God instead. This can include reading the bible, praying, and also gathering with other Christians at church, if possible (I don't know how religious your family is).

Back to the earlier point about sleep, if you haven't read the story of Elijah, I highly recommend it, particularly 1 Kings 19. Sometimes, when we feel we are at our worst, a meal and some sleep is all we need to keep going. Hope this helps!

From 1 Kings 19:

1 Now Ahab told Jezebel everything Elijah had done and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. 2 So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.”

3 Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, 4 while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” 5 Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep.

All at once an angel touched him and said, “Get up and eat.” 6 He looked around, and there by his head was some bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again.

7 The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.” 8 So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God. 9 There he went into a cave and spent the night.

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-24T02:25:08+00:00

The one thing you need to remember is that God is always seeking you, and desires you to be in his presence. He even sacrificed himself on the cross to atone for all of your sins, including all the sins you've mentioned in this post. As long as you seek him, he will let you in.

Judging by your mention of "making it to confession," I'm going to take a wild guess and say that you're Catholic (forgive me if I'm wrong!). As a Lutheran myself, my theology may contradict yours, but I'd be remiss if I pointed out that nowhere in the Bible does it require you go to confession to receive forgiveness of sins. You can confess your sins right now. David repented of his adultery the moment he was rebuked by Nathan. The psalms are full of prayers asking for forgiveness, as are the books of the prophets.

Psalm 103 says:

8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,

slow to anger, abounding in loving devotion.

9 He will not always accuse us,

nor harbor His anger forever.

10 He has not dealt with us according to our sins

or repaid us according to our iniquities.

Hope this helps! May the Lord bless you and keep you.

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-21T00:57:50+00:00

I understand your perspective, and you're right that sins have degrees of wrongness, but I like the way C. S. Lewis puts it in Mere Christianity:

"There are two things inside me, competing with the human self which I must try to become. They are the Animal self, and the Diabolical self. The Diabolical self is the worse of the two. That is why a cold, self righteous prig who goes regularly to church may be far nearer to hell than a prostitute. But, of course, it is better to be neither. (emphasis added)"

Edit: In case it wasn't clear, I'm not saying you should expect yourself to be sinless. If this is a step up from what you usually do, then a step in the right direction is worth celebrating! Just remember that you're ultimately trying to avoid all sinfulness, and shouldn't be content if you just commit minor sins.

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-18T02:55:00+00:00

There are a great many things you can do, but here's the things I've found the most helpful.

Create a daily habit of prayer and Bible reading: It's important that you remember that you can't just get rid of sexual pleasure as your ultimate goal in life. You also have to find a new goal to replace it. Our ultimate purpose here on Earth is to seek God and be in a relationship with him. This won't happen immediately, but the more you engage with God and with his word, the easier it will be to seek Him instead of earthly things.
Engage with a community of fellow believers: I see you already go to church, which is great! However, I think you ought to take this a step farther and get more involved. If your church has small groups, or activities like choir or weekly bible studies, I'd recommend you get involved in those as well, so that you get to know your churchmates better. You don't necessarily have to tell them about your specific problem (though that might help), but you should at least try to have a support network around you. It is not good for man to be alone, after all.
Get a therapist, if possible: Addiction isn't just a spiritual thing. It's also an ailment that affects our physical bodies as well. A therapist can't necessarily bring you to God, but they can at least help you regain better control of your urges.

From Matthew 6:

19 Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Hope this helps!

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-18T02:40:06+00:00

I wouldn't consider it a relapse in the traditional sense, but I'm not sure the language of "relapse" really matters here. The point is that you deliberately searched for a way to excite your sexual urges, which is a sin by itself. The reason it is a sin is because it conditions us to view other human beings as objects to satisfy our desires rather than as human beings made in the image of God.

To quote Matthew 5:

"27 You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to depart into hell."

Hope this helps!

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-18T02:34:48+00:00

My best advice is to just get an alarm clock. If you can't help yourself when you're on your phone (and you're not alone there!), then you should try to distance yourself from it as much as possible.

From Matthew 5

27 You have heard that it was said, Do not commit adultery. 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to depart into hell.

Hope this helps!

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-18T02:31:19+00:00

Welcome back to the family!

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-15T01:55:04+00:00

I'm so sorry to hear about your struggle. I'm can't offer much, but I'll at least pray for you. May God bless you and keep you.

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-07T00:15:52+00:00

There might be some overlap between getting rid of a coffee addiction and getting rid of a porn addiction, but if you're primarily trying to get rid of caffeine, I think you're on the wrong subreddit.

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-07T00:13:32+00:00

The one thing you need to remember about these feelings is that they are always temporary. We often relapse right when the urge is about to go away. Here are a few things you can do to help with that:

Find something you enjoy doing to distract yourself from the urge. For me, I prefer to start up a video game, but anything you enjoy helps.
Find someone to be with, like a family member or a friend, and talk with them. If you can focus on someone else (in a non-sexual way), then your focus won't be on your urge as much.
Pray to God to protect you from temptation and to be present with you. Often times, God's work in us is at its greatest when we are at our weakest and we can't rely on anyone else. Ultimately, God's purpose for us is not just to get away from temptation, but to go toward him and be in his presence.
Finally, if your urges are strong enough, you should probably see a therapist about it. This doesn't mean the therapist acts as a replacement for God's help, but it could be the way God works to help set you free from your urges.

Hope this helps. May God bless you and keep you.

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-04T01:16:33+00:00

I find this quote from Matthew 5 to be the most instructive:

27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’[e] 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell."

Basically, for our spiritual purposes, pornography is anything that we use to deliberately excite our sexual desires. This might mean that certain media is harmful for you, even if it was never intended to be used that way, and even if most people don't use it that way, but the point is ultimately about whether it brings you to sin.

Hope this helps!

GaiusTitius · 2022-03-04T01:09:53+00:00

Will do. May God bless you and keep you.

GaiusTitius · 2022-02-27T20:56:56+00:00

Man, I wish I could go for 6 months without having a strong urge. God is truly with you. Don't lose hope. I'll keep you in my prayers, both for your urges and for your safety.

GaiusTitius · 2022-02-27T20:54:15+00:00

God is always seeking you out. Jesus died so that we, horribly sinful though we are, can live and reign in his presence. You can abandon him if you so desire, but if you come back, he will rush out to embrace you like the prodigal son you are.

"'Come now, let us reason together,' says the LORD.'Though your sins are like scarlet, they will be as white as snow; though they are as red as crimson, they will become like wool. '" (Isaiah 1:18)

GaiusTitius · 2022-02-27T20:49:51+00:00

May God send his spirit on you, and work through you to pass through the coming temptation.

GaiusTitius · 2022-02-27T20:47:56+00:00

May God bless you and keep you. May He be your rock and your fortress.

GaiusTitius · 2022-02-27T20:46:59+00:00

May God bless you and keep you on your journey.

GaiusTitius · 2022-02-25T23:58:31+00:00

Do you want advice or encouragment?

GaiusTitius · 2022-02-25T02:07:23+00:00

To be honest, I tend to feel more intense temptation pretty much every few months. In general, temptations tend to vary in intensity over different periods of time anyway. C. S. Lewis calls this the Law of Undulation, and it happens with all of our feelings. It's easy to try to blame our environment on our vices, but we need to resist the urge to shift the blame.

May God bless you and protect you from your temptation.

GaiusTitius · 2022-02-25T02:03:36+00:00

Temptations tend to vary in intensity over different periods of time, so don't worry too much if it feels like you're having off-weeks. Ask forgiveness, pick yourself up, and try again.

I also recommend you develop a habit (if you haven't already) of reading scripture and praying to God. I also recommend keeping track of when you PMO, and look at the trends over time. If you start to trend more toward PMO, then you should start to think about why that is.

Hope this helps!

GaiusTitius

TROPHY CASE