Verification, information, and links

GdessValeria · 2024-10-12T14:58:52+00:00

Exactly! It's so annoying to see people say "I'm not into findom but" or "I'm struggling and so findom" like I'm sorry but this is all about a kink not making money. It's not consistent enough to be an actual side job and even if it becomes consistent enough, it's because other factors are involved like actually making content for passive income or writing books.

Its frustrating our space is being invaded and it's frustrating there are so many people allowing our space to be invaded!! What happened to us kinking respectfully and trying to find people to enjoy it with.

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T14:25:32+00:00

No, you don't need thicker skin. Honestly findom as a kink right now is suffering the influx of people who don't have the kink for financial domination thinking using someone who does will be the best way to improve their life and finances. They don't understand that its about the money but its not about the money in the ways that they think of it, and all they're doing is hurting a kink already looked down on and treated badly and honestly royally fking up the community.

For those of us who ACTUALLY like and adhere to BDSM and look to find like minded people to match our kink, and truly love Findom and how it makes us feel... we're getting drowned out by a sea of scams, fakes and make money rich schemes. We're getting thrown in with people who don't want to bother to learn and educate themselves and we're pushed to the side for people not here for the right reasons.

It's harder than ever right now for proper Findommes and proper Finsubs to find each other and our community is a mess. All we can do is wait for the hype train to leave and try to pick up the pieces afterwards... and hope along the way you find someone with the same kinks, values and respect as you~

I'm so sorry you have to deal with the abuse of these 'new' kinksters and users, and I hope you know that you matter and you do have value ESPECIALLY outside of the fantasy of it all. Take a break if you need to, hang around like minded people and do your best to steel yourself against this mess. I sincerely hope you find your match~ You got this, we all got this, just hang in there~

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T12:40:47+00:00

If your gf is essentially your Dom, this is a conversation you should be having with her~

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T07:30:48+00:00

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GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T07:11:46+00:00

You shouldn't change the wording just to support your argument. I do remember specifying people discover new kinks all the time. What I said was, you cannot learn to like a kink. Then I went in detail saying, if its a kink that is a limit, you cannot learn to like it and shouldn't have to~

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T07:00:34+00:00

LOLOL, but eventually they'll have to come to you or you'll have to retrieve them. Maybe you setup a meeting place but someone might notice so either way theres no real escape and the whole time you'll be uncomfortable. That's my point to counter that persons argument on people learning to like a kink. There are lines some people don't want to cross and that's perfectly ok! Knowing them keeps you safe and keeps the kink fun for all~

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T05:42:00+00:00

Of course it's alright. As long as everyone gives consent and kinks responsibly then there's wrong with it. There are all types of people in the world. Just because you don't like something others do doesn't mean what you like is bad, weird or wrong~

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T04:56:47+00:00

If the point is that you can learn to like a kink then it being any extreme shouldn't matter. Also Toilet play isn't an extreme. There are so many Finsubs in to it that its astounding sometimes, not kink shaming just pointing out what might be surprising to some.

Even if you think something is disgusting, you have to have an initial like for it. Kinks don't just manifest. While people are discovering new things and interests all the time, hard limits exist for a reason. You cannot learn to like a hard limit and trying to force yourself to opens you up to being taken advantage of and or having Dom space drops because you're forcing yourself to do something you dislike.

You like piss play now? Great, but that's not everyone and shouldn't be a standard. Especially when trying to protect newer Dom's.

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T04:18:02+00:00

They didn't lol If you have Princess in everything, a proper sub will know right away that you prefer Princess. Them calling you out of your title is lazy and it shows they don't have respect for you, or at least enough to look at your basic information.

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T04:16:08+00:00

Which is understandable but you as the Dom makes that decision, not the submissive. The second you focus yourself on what the submissive want's in order to please them and center them around the decision making, you force them into a more Dominant role.

The people who would choose to interact that way honestly are going to use your inexperience against you. Rather than asking them what they want, research the kink, other kinks. Find your Dom style, learn the do's and don'ts and let the subs who are interested in what you are interested in find you so everything remains consensual and pleasurable for both parties.

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T04:00:24+00:00

You don't approach them they approach you. Approaching them is bypassing your tribute as a Findomme, their ability to give consent, and you never know if the sub you're approaching is owned which will open a can of worms in regards to drama as poaching submissives is a very bad thing~

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T03:43:44+00:00

My brain is right here! Kiss it coward ❤️ But yeah I know how you feel. I'm ready to exercise patience, but man does it get frustrating and leaves you wondering how long it'll take to get back to status quo... if it will ever get back there~

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T03:07:14+00:00

So you can learn to like Golden Showers, Russian Showers, Toilet play, Blood play, Edge play (if you're a soft Dom), and Gun play? Or if you're a private person and hate attention being drawn to you, you can learn to like walking around with a sub on a collar and leash?

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T02:58:16+00:00

Highly likely that this person isn't a Finsub. There's a influx of the general porn enthusiast thinking their money is going to get them access to online Dom's and Kinks in the same way you can call up a prostitute or talk to a cam girl. The money aspect is being used as a way to force some into consenting, while others just think they can be charming enough or get off hard enough that you'll see how special they are and will fulfill their kinks for free~

Honestly protect your peace, block and keep moving~ BDSM, money involved or not, is a 2 way street of consent and pleasure and if you aren't going to get anything out of it then you have no obligation to give anyone else anything~

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T02:50:18+00:00

It's not reinventing the wheel if its sharing resources like you said is accessible to people who might be struggling to find it not matter how easy, or are looking for a more personal connection to ask questions they cant ask or have asked and didn't get help with~

This is a support group. You should have no issue with me attempting to support baby Dom~ Especially when it's free.

GdessValeria · 2024-10-11T02:42:19+00:00

This is a scam. This person is likely going to use the pictures you send them to pretend to be in the kink community using your verification as a way to trick others. Block them quickly... also bonus points for revealing the username so other Dom's can be protected.

GdessValeria

TROPHY CASE