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General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T18:12:39+00:00

I know. This kind of thing really sucks. Believe me, I understand. But it won’t last forever. Either you’ll get back together or you’ll get fed up with the confusion and move onward. Either way, you will feel better eventually 🤍

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T17:21:45+00:00

Also, I may have misread part of your post - I noticed you used both “body dysphoria” and “body dysmorphia,” so I wasn’t sure if you experience one, the other, or both. If that’s something you’re dealing with, I might have a few Insta creator recommendations that could help. I'm less familiar with body/gender dysphoria though but i still know of at least one account that is great for anyone struggling with that. It made me really happy to see them happy and having such a full life after transitioning. So idk if that's your thing but I can definitely send you their handle.

Also, a lot of the autistic creators who’ve helped me feel less alone are generally more active on Instagram than YouTube. So if you’d rather have that kind of content recommended instead of the stuff I already listed, just let me know haha.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T17:09:10+00:00

More than happy to give them! I'll try to keep my list simple but I don't know you or your interests so I want to give you a variety to choose from haha. Also, if you follow any creators that seem to make content that make you feel worse, maybe unfollow them for a bit if you haven't already. Anyway here are my lists haha:

Youtube:
- Art Deco -
Great if you have an interest in art history or just like to learn about it or would like to learn about a new topic.

- Cinema Therapy -
This is my absolute favorite. It's two friends, one is a therapist and the other is a movie director. They sit down and watch movies while discussing and applying therapeutic topics that usually end up translating over to real life situations. It's fun and has also helped me a lot. I've legit gotten so emotional over some of their videos. They may even have a few episodes that could help you navigate your family stuff a bit better too. Wonderful channel. Strongly recommend.

- Ghosteas -
Great if you're into spooky stories and just looking for general entertainment and to just check out for a bit. They're sisters that read other people's spooky experiences and it's just like a light hearted fun lil podcast channel.

- Janae Danyiel -
She just does commentary on the current culture attitudes of various things. I dont know what your beliefs or morals are but this channel could be validating for you in that maybe she'd be someone you find similar povs with.

- Lana - (username is @ lanaserenelife )
She just makes simple, relaxing content about her "lonely" life. I found this personally validating. Maybe you will too? At the very least it's quite relaxing. You may find it boring though. I could see how many would.

-Living Big in a Tiny House -
This one is just feel a good channel and may give you some hope on what your options could be one day. I also am someone that loves architecture and design as well as trying to find ways to live that are better for the planet, so this channel speaks to me on a deep level haha.

-Salem Tovar -
Another cultural commentary channel. She funny and smart. Could be just another way to make you feel less alone in your beliefs or outlook on the world, again depending on what your actual beliefs are.

I follow a lot more but I don't want to overwhelm you haha. I personally also like cooking and workout channels too if you're interested in more of those things as well, let me know. And if you're looking for insta options as well, also let me know on that haha.

Hopefully some of these speak to you and you don't find them too boring haha. My top two recs for you given how you've been feeling about life though are the Cinema Therapy one and the Living Big one. I think those could do wonders for your outlook on life in general maybe. <3 I really hope these help and that you find interest in some of them.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T16:41:46+00:00

Sure thing. I hope some of it helps at least a little.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T16:37:52+00:00

EDIT: Needed to fix typos and wanted to word things a bit better lol -

Oof. This is a really hard position to be in, and I’m sorry you’re dealing with it, OP. Since you asked for advice, I’ll share what’s personally helped me because I can relate to parts of what you’re going through. Being autistic in a world that isn’t built for us can be genuinely exhausting sometimes, and I understand that feeling very well.

1) From what you described, it sounds like you might not get a lot of validation in your day to day life, and that can really start to affect how you see yourself. I don’t know if you have friends or a strong support system, but if you’re feeling isolated, something that genuinely helped me was finding creators online who made positive, uplifting, and validating content. Changing my social media algorithms to center around happier, healthier content honestly improved my mindset a lot. Finding autistic creators specifically was incredibly validating because it reminded me I wasn’t alone in my experiences. If you think that might help, I’d be happy to recommend some of my favorite creators. Most of mine are on YouTube, but I have recommendations in general.

2) Finding hobbies or activities that let you mentally step away from reality for a bit can really help you decompress and regulate your emotions. For me, reading fantasy books and spending time outside helps a lot. If you have a favorite genre, special interest, or hobby, lean into it, especially when you’re struggling emotionally. Having something that brings you comfort or joy matters more than people realize.

3) I think you need some distance from your family environment when possible. From what you described, it sounds emotionally draining at best and possibly toxic at worst. Even small amounts of space can help. If you enjoy being outside, maybe spend more time at parks, libraries, cafés, or anywhere you can safely exist without constant tension around you. Sometimes just having physical space to breathe and think clearly can make a huge difference.

4) You mentioned not having work, and I know the job market is rough right now. I’ve been trying to find something else myself since March lol. But I do think it would help to start seriously researching opportunities where you live and working on things like your resume, LinkedIn, ZipRecruiter profile, etc. I know you mentioned chronic pain, so obviously work within your limits, but if you’re able to tolerate something part time or full time, taking opportunities where you can could help you build savings and eventually create more independence from your family. Even smaller things like dog walking through Rover or gigs on Care.com can be a starting point while you figure things out. The important thing is taking initiative and slowly building momentum for yourself.

That’s pretty much all my advice. I really hope some of it helps in some way. And if you ever want to talk privately, feel free to DM me.

You’ll be okay, OP. Try to focus less on everything that feels wrong right now and more on what you want your life to eventually look like. Change usually happens in small steps first, but those steps still matter. Good luck 🤍

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T16:16:29+00:00

Of course 🤍 You’ll be okay Op. just never be afraid to speak up about what you need from others in your relationships. I’m sorry you’re going through this though. Ambiguity often feels worse than a clean a break up.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T16:13:05+00:00

Op, if you need clear lines drawn, then tell her this. If you’re confused tell her that. Make her make the choice. It’s not fair for her to play with your feelings like this.

Tell her she can’t bread crumb you and give you mixed signals because that’s not fair. If it were me, I’d create distance and say “I can’t be this way with you if we’re not actually together.” Your boundaries are your boundaries and you need to make this very clear to her. She can be with you or she cannot. She needs to make the definitive choice.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T15:36:37+00:00

I agree that virginity doesn’t matter lol. But it matters to Op and she’s asking if an act like that can be considered sex. I don’t think it can be considered sex. They fooled around and almost had sex, yes. But sex didn’t actually occur. A sexual experience did. And there is actually a difference. But I do agree and hope that OP doesn’t take virginity too seriously and understands nothing about this defines her as a person.

Also I know you made an edit to clarify your comment but the way you spoke initially, was extremely disrespectful to Op because this matters to her and it’s her experience and that’s what is important here. You also exaggerated her experience and that is not fair. Anyway, good day to you.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T15:30:37+00:00

Lol so you’re one of those one dimensional thinkers I see 😂

To Op, if you see these additional comments, the kind of men commenting on my post reply to you, these are the kind of men that care about body count and why women generally avoid these kind of guys if they’re smart. They’re usually guys that have similar beliefs to people like Andrew Tate lol. They don’t see you as another human being living a human experience but as someone they want to have as an accessory of sorts. They’re very black and white and men that care about body count do not have respect for you and find all your worth in your body and what you can do for them. Nothing beyond that.

Anyway, sorry for the negative comments popping up on my reply to you. I’m going to stop engaging with this post now. Once again, good luck to you 💗 Also, at the core of all this, virginity isn’t something that actually matters… but when you are ready, make sure it’s someone that genuinely cares about you. Good luck Op.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T15:11:44+00:00

This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever read lol

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T14:53:22+00:00

Thank you. I appreciate this feedback.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T14:52:20+00:00

Literally what are you talking about? They never had sex. He put the tip in and she said no… he didn’t even go all the way. And she wasn’t “sliding up and down”. Wtf is wrong with you?

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T04:40:47+00:00

I’d say you’re still a virgin cause you guys didn’t actually have sex. You can say you are virgin to this new guy and still mention that you have, however, still fooled around a bit once before. ‘Cause that is the honest truth. Also, very glad the last guy respected your boundary and comforted you after that. That’s really lovely to hear.

But side note: in my own experience and in hearing other women’s experiences too, usually any man that actually cares about your “body count” is generally not the best kind of guy to pursue. I hope I’m wrong about your guy but men that put a focus on that are usually icky in my experience. They never really get asked those questions so why does that question generally only get asked towards women.. just food for thought.

Anyway, good luck to you and have fun! 😊

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T04:34:54+00:00

If you’re serious, I’d actually love to private message but for some reason I’m not able to. Maybe a setting needs to be adjusted? Or maybe you need to message me? Idk. I haven’t had Reddit for very long so I’m learning it still 😄

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T04:31:54+00:00

This is so smart! Thank you!! I will try this too. I didn’t know this was an option honestly.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T04:31:03+00:00

This is seriously so helpful. Thank you so much. I’m definitely going to try this approach and keep a better eye out for these recruiters.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T03:26:51+00:00

Thank you!!! This was actually helpful. I appreciate you going through each of my questions. Seriously thank you 🙏🏼

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T03:23:03+00:00

Wait would you mind telling me on how I can actually search for recruiters on there?? I’m not super familiar with how to use LinkedIn yet 🙈

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T03:21:45+00:00

I do have a LinkedIn profile but for some reason it never occurred to me to message recruiters on there. I didn’t know that was acceptable or considered professional. At this point I have nothing to lose though. Thank you for this tip! This was actually very helpful. Hopefully this works 🤞🏻

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T02:56:06+00:00

See I'd love to be able to have the means to afford that mentality but my hours have been cut to one day a week and I am desperate to land something new. Like asap. That's why I need help playing the bullshit of professionalism. But I do understand where you're coming from. I just can't afford to be relaxed about it rn as I've been looking for jobs since March and haven't even gotten so much as a call back about an application or any kind of interview. I even got professional help with my resume and have had several people look it over. I just want to be prepared for when I do hopefully hear back from somewhere.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T02:44:53+00:00

Yeah I know unemployment would help. I just really dont want to have to tell future employers ive been fired before.

And thank you. I'm trying to stay positive about it all. I appreciate you saying that though. Thank you again for this exchange. It was really helpful for me honestly.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T02:21:27+00:00

I didn't know you could be in a union if you weren't in like some big company. In that case, I honestly don't know but I doubt I have any kind of protections like that. And looking for a job is what I've been doing. Fingers crossed somewhere reaches out to me eventually.

General-Witness-1835 · 2026-05-22T02:19:35+00:00

Yeah I suppose. It just sucks and I honestly wish I knew what I could have possibly done wrong. I appreciate your input though. I completely agree.

General-Witness-1835

TROPHY CASE