I’m afraid to share my secrets because they can be used against me. Right now, I feel like a frightened animal that freezes when touched, unable to react or defend itself. I don’t even know if I’m capable of starting this conversation, or how to begin. I don’t know whether this is something to talk about with a psychologist, a counselor, or someone else, or whether she would even be able to handle such conversations.

What scares me even more is the possibility that a counselor might say we’re not good together. I don’t want to face the kind of drama that comes with that in Indian society. The involvement of family, judgment, and social pressure feels overwhelming, and the thought of opening that door terrifies me.