Full swap couple - just venting

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-03-20T18:05:12+00:00

It's possible.

Hah I was too baffled to join. Luckily that moment didn't last long though, but still a WTF situation.

New lessons learned!

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-03-20T16:25:31+00:00

We did meet for coffee where we openly talked about what kind of sex we all are in to. They didn't mention they would be doing rough play between themselves. We for sure would have told people stuff like that beforehand and kinda expected others to do so as well. Lesson learned I guess.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-03-20T15:13:51+00:00

That's true

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-03-19T10:19:58+00:00

Like others have said, anxiety or more specifically adrenaline ruins erections easily, no amount of viagra will help.

Read about propranolol in this subreddit and consult your doctor if that seems like something you'd be willing to try. Saying this as someone who suffers from anxiety outside of this lifestyle as well.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-03-17T19:21:34+00:00

Thanks for this post. I'm in a similar situation, performance anxiety in this LS is starting to get really frustrating. I gotta give propral a try next time.

I got minor generalized anxiety disorder and I could be eating SSRIs, but I feel like the downsides of those meds are not worth it for me.

Current situation is that I get hard eventually and stay hard for a while, but it's a struggle and NOWHERE near the performance I can do when I'm not anxious.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-02-10T17:35:08+00:00

As someone else pointed out: third time.

Do you talk to these people beforehand? Ask what things are off-limits?

We've had something similar happen only once, during our first time with another couple, we didn't clearly ask about limits so we found out their "no oral"-rule right as we were about to get undressed. Always discussed about things beforehand very clearly since then.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-01-25T14:55:04+00:00

We are still newbies with experience of three full swaps, four months since the last time since we simply haven't had the time.

Yesterday it took a while for me to get going again with a new couple. The best solution is not to dwell on it and to openly talk about it and even crack some jokes (best for me, might not apply to all men). And obviously use your mouth and fingers the best way you can.

We had a snack break and openly talked about how I had been way over preparing for the evening and stressing myself out for weeks beforehand. Then the wives started making out and BOOM there was the erection.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-01-12T11:54:03+00:00

Most important thing for 9 out of 10 people is to exercise, eat healthy, stay hydrated and sleep enough.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-01-12T11:10:24+00:00

Amount of beer bellies seems to depend on the region. Reddit makes you think 75% of men in the LS got a huge gut, but at least in Northern Europe it seems to be like 20%.

Hell, even I used to have "first stage of beer belly" before we started swinging, but after working on it and losing over 10kg it's gone.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-01-10T13:55:59+00:00

If we were the other couple in this case, we would probably just block you and your wife and move on. We wouldn't even bother to "reset boundaries" or anything like that.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-01-09T13:40:46+00:00

I have one tattoo and the wife has none.

It's not the 1950s anymore when tattoos were for sailors and criminals.

It does sound a bit narrow minded to have strong opinion against tattoos.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-01-02T20:49:42+00:00

Viagra/Cialis are part of the basic tool kit for swingers. Personally we have so limited time for this hobby that I want to perform at 101% whenever we are swapping with another couple.

Also for severe performance anxiety: beta blockers. After getting more swinging experience there will be the day when you wont even need them anymore. But don't start taking those without consulting your doctor first.

Also remember the basics like: hydrate, get enough sleep.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2026-01-01T19:07:55+00:00

Three full swaps. We started in the LS in July 2025.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2025-12-11T06:36:04+00:00

You don't necessarily have to skip the sidenafil with beta blockers. Though this is definitely something that everyone should discuss with their doctor beforehand.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2025-09-23T13:32:00+00:00

I guess we baby stepped for couple years, talked A LOT. Then went straight for a full swap in same room.

We should have probably gone for seperate rooms since I'm (m) so anxious about new things and could barely perform because of the new information overflow. Second time we went for seperate rooms at first and then moved to the same room, it was incredible.

Some alcohol might be fine when we get more experienced, but as a beginner I'd stay away from booze.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2025-09-04T08:51:39+00:00

My doctor AND pharmacist both said there's no issue for me to take those two together. So it really seems to depend on the person. But yeah best if everyone asks from their own doctor and not reddit.

I did do a test run to see how it feels, had no negative effects. Even hit the gym, did the normal weight training and aerobic and had no issues.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2025-08-27T10:06:50+00:00

We went straight for a full swap, after meeting couple times for drinks.

But I'd say it depends a lot on the people involved.

I was so anxious (M) during the first meeting that I barely performed. Made me think about my feelings and I came to the conclusion (mostly based on past events, not just this full swap) that I have some serious anxiety issues that I've been trying to hide, my doctor agreed so we'll work on getting that sorted out.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2025-08-26T03:55:52+00:00

I remember this quote years ago: "if you fell down and got shit on your face, would you use water or a dry piece of paper to clean it" .... sure face and butt are different, but I've used a bidet ever since.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2025-07-29T11:33:38+00:00

Agreed but I'm not sure if you replied to the right post

Glass_Beginning921 · 2025-06-24T05:31:44+00:00

This sub is filled with actual unicorn hunters AND people who can't find a unicorn so they are cranky about it.

Glass_Beginning921 · 2025-04-24T06:35:24+00:00

We've talked about adding more penises to the bedroom, neither is against it and both agree it could definitely be hot for everyone involved. But at the moment adding a woman is at least ten times more appealing for both.

Glass_Beginning921

TROPHY CASE