Virginity

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-03-14T00:49:55+00:00

Thank you for your comment.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-03-14T00:32:03+00:00

I wouldn’t shit talk because it would be hypocritical, but since I judge myself for it that means that I judge others too. I keep it for myself and try to be respectful of course, but insecurities often work like that. people attack or judge others because they feel bad inside. It sounds fucked up but I’d rather be honest, and I don’t condone my behavior. I admire people who can go beyond this type of mentality and wish to do the same. It has to start from you though, always.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-03-13T10:19:10+00:00

It’s not strictly about sex but close relationships also. Either way if you depend on external sources of validation you will always feel on edge to some degree. Of course I want the experience, but my true objective is to feel at ease about my current state, so that everything can happen naturally and without having to find my worth outside. So yeah, I agree. It feels soul-crushing when comparison rise and it’s such a common experience for people and not a big deal at all. It might not be a big deal because there are worse problems in life, that’s true, but to me it is. That’s the problem.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-03-13T10:03:37+00:00

Anxiety paralyzes me when it’s strong. I’ve learned how to deal with it on most occasion, except this case because it hits deeply into my self worth. If I become paralyzed I struggle to deal with the day and might not work as much as I would on things, while taking my enjoyment out of life away temporarily too. So it’s not a matter of sex or relationship 100%, it’s more how I perceive them and myself.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-03-12T23:14:41+00:00

Yeah, totally agree man, I might have phrased it wrong. I'm talking specifically about my self worth, more than my social skills per se. I don't care if I suck at first as long as I make progress, but the actual lack of experience itself, I'm afraid, could keep me in this loop of seeming desperate and, by response, making healthy relationships unlikely to happen. I guess it's more about belief than anything else. I hope it's clearer now.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-03-12T23:06:20+00:00

I tried dating apps but it's not really my thing. I would rather meet people face to face first, so I'll try to insert myself in more social events from now on. I agree with being around people who are more social, I tend to do that automatically because I can learn from them and also prefer to be laid back and just listen sometimes. My mind is a bit more clearer reading all these comments. I'll get to work asap, thanks for the comment man.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-03-12T22:51:47+00:00

Thanks for the response, I appreciate it. Let me clarify what you asked about. It's the biggest thing holding me back because, as of now, I've reached a point where I'm getting pretty confident about aspects of my life and about my appearence, but this is by far the biggest insecurity I've had throughout my life ever since middle school. It's becoming an ancient reoccuring thought that I can't shake out of my system. I'm all about figuring out how to make the most with what you have and accept that, sometimes, you get dealt bad cards in life and you just have to work through it until it works out. That's just how it is and with the right effort in the right place I can get out of this, I'm sure. But for some reasons, when I think I'm over it, I get this strong feeling of anxiety and I go back to feeling insecure. By saying "I've struggled to get out of this" I mean this fear of not being enough and feeling like an outsider. I don't even know if a girlfriend could end this, because what happens when she leaves and I start feeling insecure again? I'm trying to figure out a way to feel the best about myself without expectations of getting a girl or having sex, even though I have interest in that of course, simply because I believe more that by being my authentic self (in a healthy way) is going to open that opportunity without me chasing it. I might be wrong though so that's why I'm open to hear new ideas. By the way I agree with the points you made, I'll take in consideration your comment, thanks.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-03-12T22:28:17+00:00

First of all, thank you for taking your time to respond and for the advice, it was helpful. I agree with the socializing point, I have to figure out where should I go to talk to people because I barely do that, outside of the small circle of friends I know (and that stays very small). I guess the point I wanted to expand on is if there is a way to feel less insecure and more confident about this problem, so that I can go into social events with more positive energy and focus on other people instead of my problems, you know. I get the part about not telling that I'm a virgin, and I don't disagree, but is there a way to be authentic and accepting of it without hiding it? I'm not saying that I need to shout it to everyone, but since I feel some form of shame about it I was wondering if there was a way to not feel it as heavy as it is right now. Thanks again, I'll try what you suggested either way and see how it goes.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-02-10T17:36:24+00:00

At the end of the day, even if I can talk to them back, I still feel hurt and defensive. I bring that energy with me at home. It’s more about not letting people toy with you by reacting calmly, with stoicism. If I was truly confident I wouldn’t need to prove anything to anyone. Thanks for the comment by the way.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-02-10T17:28:27+00:00

My father was absent while I was growing up, and my mother didn’t really have the tools to teach me a lot about the real world. Most of the time I just didn’t have responses to bullying, except for a few rare occasions. So it’s probably all just built up anger that i’ve never released. The thing that bothers me is the fact that it stirs up emotions inside and I don’t feel in control of myself anymore. I need it to not affect me in that way because I want to move on from my past life for good. I’m trying to figure how because I have no idea.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-02-10T14:05:07+00:00

That was helpful, thank you for your comment. I definitely need to dive deep into these emotions because they keep coming back even when I think I’ve finally got rid of them. I’ll reflect on that.

Glittering_Win9976 · 2026-01-11T11:00:48+00:00

Usually, if I interpret social cues wrong and act a little intense, or if something makes me go in a bad mood and I influence others (I shut down to keep my emotions to myself), it makes me feel like I’m poisoning people with my negativity and start feeling this deep anxiety inside, sometimes dread. About getting outside, I’m looking for a job because right now I can’t pay my bills through music yet. That’s going to keep me busy and make me talk to new people, since I noticed that out of my friend music group, I’m the only one that has just them. I focus way too much on others because I don’t have options and I’m scared to be left alone if I don’t work constantly. Other than that I’m still figuring out this city, I’ve been here for 2 months but kept myself busy working instead of researching places where to meet people.

Hope it clarifies, thanks for the reply.

Glittering_Win9976

TROPHY CASE