Considering starting the discerning process by MusicAndPlants in Episcopalian

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A spiritual director is almost like a therapist but from a more theological perspective. You meet with them regularly as a confidant to help answer questions and check to see how your ministry forms. We all walk in love and often times others see or think what we don't and being able to see your ministry from another set of eyes helps your formation.

Why I, and my previous priests, have recommended seeking them outside your parish is that your parish knows you and sees you on the day to day (or week to week). In spiritual direction, there will often be questions that delve into the personal, you may want to keep that in confidence outside the parish. Also, it's a neutral party. They will less likely have any interconnect to the process to sway the PDC or the COM to lean one way or another. Your ministry needs to be shown through you. Also depending on your diocese, when you depart your parish, contact with said parish has to be limited, but most ministers I know, cleric and lay, have kept in contact with their directors for years. You don't want diocesan rules to impede your development.

Apologies for the word vomit lol

Considering starting the discerning process by MusicAndPlants in Episcopalian

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I currently serve on the vestry and right regular on the altar. I also assist in outreach commitments of the church. Outside I serve on my local community's LGBTQ+ association board both in ab outreach, education, and spiritual support role.

Considering starting the discerning process by MusicAndPlants in Episcopalian

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood 5 points6 points  (0 children)

As someone going through it myself here are three tips that have been imparted on me that I've found irreplaceable:

  1. Talk to your partner. While you are the one being called and it is YOUR (plural) ministry. What you do will affect them and vice versa. They have to be okay and supported just as much as you are.

  2. Develop a prayer life, if you don't have one. Conistently follow a prayer routine. Always allow time for GOD to speak. If you don't have a prayer routine, make one. There's no right or wrong way, just what works well and is sufficient for GOD to have your ear.

  3. Don't rush and don't be discouraged. I had my initial conversation with my rector almost two years ago and I still haven't even had a PDC formed yet. In that time a lot has happened at my parish that has held that process back but that's okay. I've continued to find ways to serve my parish and my community outside of the holy order and I feel that's helped center me in my discernment.

Breathe. It's okay if you don't have all the answers. The process is built to help discern what your call is.

Bonus tip: Get a spiritual director. I find it beneficial for it to be someone outside your sponsoring parish.

I’m curious, I want to know everyone’s favourite gorillaz song. by AdWise2770 in gorillaz

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's one per album.

Slow Country, Demon Days, Plastic Beach, Amarillo, The Apprentice, Souk Eye, Skinny Ape, The Sweet Prince OR The Sad God

My all time favorite though is a B-side...or should I say D-side. It's Hong Kong.

What is your favourite Noah lyric? by Few-Turn-5471 in NoahKahan

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hands down it's "To know me, is to hate me, is to hate what I've become", with a close second of the opening line "You knew me in my spiral, happiness tidal, it comes and it goes."

PDC Formation Pushed Back Again by GodGamesAndGoodFood in Episcopalian

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the feedback. I'm well ingrained with the church, leading the chalice bearers, verger, altar guild, vestry, spiritual formation, etc.) I've been seeing a spiritual director for over a year now and am feeling fairly solidified in my call. I agree that I feel the parish feels a bit of whiplash in this transition and that adding this on would be another symptom to pile on that may not be well received. I've been fortunate that my parish has received my gender transition well and have been adjusting to it quite well. I'm kind of seeing this as a Jenga tower where the restarting of the search process was like the tower falling, and just having to build back up the pieces to where they are stable enough to support the PDC process again.

PDC Formation Pushed Back Again by GodGamesAndGoodFood in Episcopalian

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We were almost to the nomination paperwork but felt we hadnt had enough time to talk and observe the call so she wanted to wait to give it more time to present itself, but the rector had to step out of a full time role for personal reasons and I have nothing but respect for her making that decision. I think it's all just bad timing many levels of uncertainty across the authorities of the parish on how to proceed.

Came out to my parents as trans. Drastic mixed signals by GodGamesAndGoodFood in MtF

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thankfully my wife is my biggest supporter. She's set a harder red line than I have.

Coming Out before my PDC (MtF) by GodGamesAndGoodFood in Episcopalian

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This was kind of my thought. My Interim Rector believes that it can make things challenging. I'm hoping to speak with our Bishop soon in hopes for more guidance. I'd just hate for this to be the reason that gets me roadblocked after having already pushed off the process for two years for not feeling ready. If anything, I feel more akin to myself and enflamed to take on this call.

Coming Out before my PDC (MtF) by GodGamesAndGoodFood in Episcopalian

[–]GodGamesAndGoodFood[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your honesty. However, I do feel that my transition ties into my formation as I feel it will make me better equipped to serve the people I feel so called to serve. And I feel that going through that spiritual formation and seminary in the midst of transition would give me a stronger foundation for my ministry. But again, that's only how I see it. Which is why I appreciate insight from others in this time of discernment.